Going Home
NEVER underestimate 82 year olds!78 total reviews
Comment from Bobbi22
Great story here - probably much better if I was in the audience watching it be played out rather than reading through the script. I do love the humor you included - ordinary things that the elderly do that are so funny. Well written.
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Great story here - probably much better if I was in the audience watching it be played out rather than reading through the script. I do love the humor you included - ordinary things that the elderly do that are so funny. Well written.
Comment Written 24-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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thx so much RightPics - I'll have to send you a ticket then, won't I!!! yes, I'd rather perform it or see it performed than read it too my dear!
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I would love to see a live performance of this!
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me too! I love to perform my pieces and am putting together a couple of one woman shows!
Comment from Doc Holiday
Well done script, Sharyn! The material sounds very familiar, at least the topic does anyway...I wonder why?
I've met the OT after my mother had her stroke and rehab. You've got the language and comments down very well. Is this your mother we are talking about here or a fictional represenation of her? Nice job!
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Well done script, Sharyn! The material sounds very familiar, at least the topic does anyway...I wonder why?
I've met the OT after my mother had her stroke and rehab. You've got the language and comments down very well. Is this your mother we are talking about here or a fictional represenation of her? Nice job!
Comment Written 24-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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gosh I wonder why Doc ... this is pretty darned close to my mother, believe me! blessings for reviewing! Sharyn
Comment from Jaxson Phoenix
You are a masterful story teller. This had everything, and even brought a tear to my eye. Thanks for sharing this wonderful tale. Keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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You are a masterful story teller. This had everything, and even brought a tear to my eye. Thanks for sharing this wonderful tale. Keep up the good work.
Comment Written 24-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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aah - you have me where my heart is - i.e. scripts ... thx so much for reading, and being moved Jaxson - for this is what this piece is all about - you "got" it, and I'm grateful! Best wishes, Sharyn
Comment from Chris Tee
Sharyn you are indeed a very talented writer and this is en excellent script that you have created here. Well done with this splendid and enjoyable work. Great job!
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Sharyn you are indeed a very talented writer and this is en excellent script that you have created here. Well done with this splendid and enjoyable work. Great job!
Comment Written 24-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Chris thank you so much - high praise indeed from the Master of Verse!
Comment from Taurean Monkey
Geez, Visionary, who's been reviewing your scripts? The preamble says it all! LOL
Although it won't bother you, you've got a double space after home:
Yep - now what we do is go out to your house, and do an assessment to see if it's safe for you to go home or not.
I love the whole of the section that contains the dialogue about the mother being considered a flight risk...
lovely tragicomedy. The wry humour is the kind that appeals to me and I'm most familiar with. There's a lot in here I can relate to, including the distance 'thing' ('they're expecting me to live in California, I'm looking at New England - it's at least eight hours away by plane; I'm not daft!)
The home visit is delightful, yet sad, whilst being funny:
She makes coffee, serves it in her beautiful cups ... By the end of the day we're back teeth awash in coffee (including the sprightly running up to her house and jumping in and out of the bath!)
This is a wonderfully touching, well-written script, Visionary. Warm regards, Tricia
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Geez, Visionary, who's been reviewing your scripts? The preamble says it all! LOL
Although it won't bother you, you've got a double space after home:
Yep - now what we do is go out to your house, and do an assessment to see if it's safe for you to go home or not.
I love the whole of the section that contains the dialogue about the mother being considered a flight risk...
lovely tragicomedy. The wry humour is the kind that appeals to me and I'm most familiar with. There's a lot in here I can relate to, including the distance 'thing' ('they're expecting me to live in California, I'm looking at New England - it's at least eight hours away by plane; I'm not daft!)
The home visit is delightful, yet sad, whilst being funny:
She makes coffee, serves it in her beautiful cups ... By the end of the day we're back teeth awash in coffee (including the sprightly running up to her house and jumping in and out of the bath!)
This is a wonderfully touching, well-written script, Visionary. Warm regards, Tricia
Comment Written 24-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Well bless you Tricia - NOW we're talking! (My first love is scripts and theatre) - I'll go find that errant double space - how dare it! I'm so glad you got the "tragicomedy" of the piece. I always feel that that's what MAKES comedy good comedy - and you got the "distance" thing too, hmm? Bless you for reading, understanding, cogently commenting & reviewing rather than just tell me what a pretty picture I've chosen!! Blessings my dear! Sharyn
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Most enjoyable, Sharyn. The poor
dear just wanted to left alone to
do as she wants in her own home...
and she proved she is able.
Aplaud! Aplaud!
Margaret
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Most enjoyable, Sharyn. The poor
dear just wanted to left alone to
do as she wants in her own home...
and she proved she is able.
Aplaud! Aplaud!
Margaret
Comment Written 24-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Thx so much for reading & reviewing Margaret - yep - you've got it - that's EXACTLY what she wanted (and got!) Blessings, Sharyn
Comment from VioletBlueDawn
Bravo. Very well done.
You reached inside of me and fiddled with my emotions, just like a maestro plays a finely-tuned violin. I could go on and on, repeating the same things all your fans have said already. But I can't. I'm near tears. A similar scene played out in my life a few years back, and then again this year. All of this hits so close to home that I will have to revisit this in smaller doses. Not because it's too long, but because my emotions are still being fiddled with, lol. I especially love when you turn to the audience and share your inner thoughts.
Can't wait to see it on stage! Please have tissues ready. :)
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Bravo. Very well done.
You reached inside of me and fiddled with my emotions, just like a maestro plays a finely-tuned violin. I could go on and on, repeating the same things all your fans have said already. But I can't. I'm near tears. A similar scene played out in my life a few years back, and then again this year. All of this hits so close to home that I will have to revisit this in smaller doses. Not because it's too long, but because my emotions are still being fiddled with, lol. I especially love when you turn to the audience and share your inner thoughts.
Can't wait to see it on stage! Please have tissues ready. :)
Comment Written 24-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2012
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Complementary tissues at the front door VB! Thx again! Sharyn. PS: I love YOUR work too - may I 'fan' you???
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Of course! We shall fan each other here @ FS and also during hot flashes, lol.
Comment from Shirley McLain
I find this to be a very good story line, but I also have a difficult time reading it. I guess scripts are just not my thing to read but you did do a great job.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2012
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I find this to be a very good story line, but I also have a difficult time reading it. I guess scripts are just not my thing to read but you did do a great job.
Comment Written 23-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2012
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hey there Okie - good for you tackling this one - sorry, it's one of the LONGEST! I should have started you on a little one!! You'll find my prose pieces much easier I think. Did you find "Torture at Sea"? Anyway, keep an eye out for my prose & poetry - a much easier read - and no, scripts aren't for everyone, but thanks for the attempt kiddo!
S
Comment from Shirley B
Oh how I loved this! :) Being a nurse I could relate to that "have you had a BM today? Stuff. I felt this story as a nurse and as a daughter. You used great imagery. Wonderful dialogue. I enjoyed reading your work, Shirley
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2012
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Oh how I loved this! :) Being a nurse I could relate to that "have you had a BM today? Stuff. I felt this story as a nurse and as a daughter. You used great imagery. Wonderful dialogue. I enjoyed reading your work, Shirley
Comment Written 23-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2012
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thx so much Shirley!!So glad you enjoyed, and thank you for reading & reviewing! Best wishes, Sharyn
Comment from FlorrieFan
The character of the mother really comes through. Despite her flaws she is strong and independent and has done a lot for her ungrateful daughters. Well done with tension and drama and a lot of wondering what is going to happen.
A tiny suggestion would be to "show" this a little more if possible:
Painfully shy as a kid, child of two raging drunks, she has to grow up defending her privacy, out of shame. No other children can ever come to play. Then they'd know! They'd see her parents passed out - the place stinking of booze and cigarettes, always ugly and in disarray.
These details are crucial to understanding her character...
Thank you for creating an unforgettable character and a modern yet universal situation.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2012
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The character of the mother really comes through. Despite her flaws she is strong and independent and has done a lot for her ungrateful daughters. Well done with tension and drama and a lot of wondering what is going to happen.
A tiny suggestion would be to "show" this a little more if possible:
Painfully shy as a kid, child of two raging drunks, she has to grow up defending her privacy, out of shame. No other children can ever come to play. Then they'd know! They'd see her parents passed out - the place stinking of booze and cigarettes, always ugly and in disarray.
These details are crucial to understanding her character...
Thank you for creating an unforgettable character and a modern yet universal situation.
Comment Written 23-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2012
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good idea! thx so much Florrie! and thx for reviewing!! blessings, Sharyn
