Thanks for Giving
White men's empty promises.15 total reviews
Comment from adewpearl
strong use of alternate-line rhyme
good internal rhyme in the first line
good alliteration in shuffle of shackled feet
Strong expression of intense emotion in this poem spoken from the point of view of those who were displaced and oppressed
What a tragic story of once proud people reduced to those living on the welfare of those who lied to them and stole from them
Excellent tone of satire in the Thanks litany
This is quite powerful, Kay. Brooke
reply by the author on 14-May-2012
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strong use of alternate-line rhyme
good internal rhyme in the first line
good alliteration in shuffle of shackled feet
Strong expression of intense emotion in this poem spoken from the point of view of those who were displaced and oppressed
What a tragic story of once proud people reduced to those living on the welfare of those who lied to them and stole from them
Excellent tone of satire in the Thanks litany
This is quite powerful, Kay. Brooke
Comment Written 13-May-2012
reply by the author on 14-May-2012
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Good morning Grandma, Thank you for reading. Yes, I was angry, I will fight for my people no matter what. We are a race that is disappearing, our culture and our young folks. I don't celebrate Australia Day and after 200 years, Sorry Day doesn't cut for me. Bless you my friend, K.
Comment from Carrie Carson
My gosh, this is a forceful read. Imperialism is often disguised with "Godly" intent. The difference, I think, between a spiritual and a religious life. One being universal and the other an arbitrary arrangement to exploit.
No spag issues, great form.
Sorry day I guess is kind of like Junteenth in the US. Whites do have much history to apologize for.
reply by the author on 13-May-2012
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My gosh, this is a forceful read. Imperialism is often disguised with "Godly" intent. The difference, I think, between a spiritual and a religious life. One being universal and the other an arbitrary arrangement to exploit.
No spag issues, great form.
Sorry day I guess is kind of like Junteenth in the US. Whites do have much history to apologize for.
Comment Written 13-May-2012
reply by the author on 13-May-2012
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Carrie, Thank you for reading and glad my point hit home - whites have much to be sorry for. Blessings, K.
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Sure, you're welcome.
Comment from Shirley B
Thank you for sharing this poem. It is a story poem. I learned a lot. The abab rhyme scheme works well in this poem. Thank you for your author notes also. The picture you chose was an excellent choice. Great job. Thank you for sharing, Shirley
reply by the author on 13-May-2012
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Thank you for sharing this poem. It is a story poem. I learned a lot. The abab rhyme scheme works well in this poem. Thank you for your author notes also. The picture you chose was an excellent choice. Great job. Thank you for sharing, Shirley
Comment Written 13-May-2012
reply by the author on 13-May-2012
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Shirley, Thank you for reading, glad you learned something about our history. We are still fighting for our land. Blessings, K.
Comment from mumsyone
Your first words, "Red dust rising," brought to mind our American Indian. As I read on, I could still see the parallel(s). Nice that you have a National Sorry Day; I don't think we've ever apologized to our native Americans for the way they were treated.
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reply by the author on 13-May-2012
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Your first words, "Red dust rising," brought to mind our American Indian. As I read on, I could still see the parallel(s). Nice that you have a National Sorry Day; I don't think we've ever apologized to our native Americans for the way they were treated.
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Comment Written 13-May-2012
reply by the author on 13-May-2012
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Thank you for reading and understanding that the white man's way is not the way to peace. Blessings, K.
Comment from Starlit Ink
Wow, this is touching and powerful. Although I can't say that I enjoy perpetuating the awful myth of the racist white man, it is beautifully written. This has happened to white races in history also. Starlit Ink :)
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reply by the author on 13-May-2012
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Wow, this is touching and powerful. Although I can't say that I enjoy perpetuating the awful myth of the racist white man, it is beautifully written. This has happened to white races in history also. Starlit Ink :)
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Comment Written 13-May-2012
reply by the author on 13-May-2012
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Thank you Starlit Ink' - tis no myth that my people were treated like the American slaves. We are still fighting for our tribal lands. Thank you for reading. Blessings, K.
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Yes, they were treated wrongfully by not just white, but the soldiers were many races. The myth of the racist white man is perpetuated and completely untrue. I am white (Irish) and our race was horribly mistreated also. It doesn't give me the right, however, to point fingers, although it can seem so sad. thanks for sharing. Teresa
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I agree with you - no pointing of fingers by me, our race is one of the oldest in the world and yes, sad and cannot be undone. Blessings, Kace.
