Comment from P1

Excellent

this is such a lovely soft relaxing piece of writing
the picture and the colours you chose are perfect
never heard of this style of writing before but i have
to say i really enjoyed reading it. x

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine. I found it on this site that Brooke recommended to me:
Shadowpoetry.com

Comment from donaldww

Exceptional

Exceptional. The Terzaneelle is wonderful and you have created a gorgeous example.

The picture and colours are beautiful matching blues.

Between reality and a sweet dream

That is a perfect description of a mermaid.

DW

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine. Thanks so much for this lovely six Donald.

Comment from wiljacro

Exceptional

HI! Ine. This is a beautifully told tale of the World of a lovely sea-lady,the Mermaid.
The flow of the poem is very much in accord with the endless flow of the seas, and the picture is perfact. Well written, thanks for sharing. wiljacro.

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine. Thanks ever so much for the gorgeous six. It revceived more than one- Lucky me.

Comment from Chris Tee

Excellent

Ine your poem is correctly done in the repeating sequences here, but I am afraid that you have not got the meter right here. For instant Gently is not iambic (GENT ly) AQ ua TIC also not right.
I will not penalize your stars, but this work needs improvement in the meter.
The terzanelle is a huge pain, but leaves you delirious with joy if you finish ... They are strictly written in iambic pentameter.

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine. I know, but only went off it a couple of times- I thought.

reply by Chris Tee on 01-May-2012

Ina with respect you should not go of at all. You are number four in the rankings girl.

Comment from judiverse

Exceptional

You capture the mystery and beauty of the mermaid so well, I'm saying six stars. You carry out the format in wonderful style. You paint a lovely word picture with expressions like "between reality and a sea dream." Nice use of alliteration like "bedazzle blue-green." You describe so well the magic of the ocean and the beauty of the mermaid. One suggestion: you might want to try 'never to surface" instead of "to never surface" in the last stanza for smoother flow. judi

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine. Glad you liked it this much and thanks so much for the six. Will change according to your suggestio, thanks.

reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine. Glad you liked it this much and thanks so much for the six. I just checked for the change, but it would spoil the meter-so I think I leave it.

Comment from Hareem.S

Exceptional

I love this poem, this sound ubforced and flows very well. This seems like a very interesting form and I enjoyed reading it a lot.

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine. Glad you liked it so much and very pleased with the lovely six.

Comment from Tomoso

Exceptional

Great stuff!
I loved the flow of this poem. Thanks for your notes as I never heard of this form of poetry. I liked the alliteration and sound of the line"Swimming freely in a sunlit sea scheme." The artwork is stunning and the colours are brought to life by the poem.
Well done,thanks for sharing

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine. S pleased you liked it and thanks ever so much for the lovely six.

Comment from psalmist

Excellent

Thanks for introducing a new style. I do like styles that use repeating lines. I thought you did a terrific job with this terzanelle. Your repeating lines wove in and out like the mermaid swimming through the sea. Excellent job carrying the alternating aba/bab rhyme scheme throughout. You have "painted" a lovely sea scene with your words. Well done. Linda

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine

Comment from misscookie

Excellent

Beauitful artwork of a Mermaid Who lives deep beneaththe sea.
I could vision another peacefull world down there
You captured my attention with each line I read.

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine

reply by misscookie on 01-May-2012

Your welcome, have a nice day.

Comment from TELLER OF TALES

Excellent

Fantastic words expressed by the author briliantly put and very wellguided, like a dream from th e mind of it's creator, a fantasy very well lived thank you ilove the piece verymuch...TheTeller of tales..

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 01-May-2012

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reply by the author on 01-May-2012

Thanks for your generous review. Have a lovely day and take care, Ine