New dawn entangles sullen night
The power of love123 total reviews
Comment from adewpearl
I'm so glad you used iambic tetrameter to give your triolet the flowing lyrical quality this form is capable of
strong rhymes in good triolet form and effective use of the repeated lines
nice touches of alliteration and a lovely romantic tone :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2012
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I'm so glad you used iambic tetrameter to give your triolet the flowing lyrical quality this form is capable of
strong rhymes in good triolet form and effective use of the repeated lines
nice touches of alliteration and a lovely romantic tone :-) Brooke
Comment Written 14-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the thoughtful review.
It is an interesting form and I don't think I've quite got it yet.
Steve
Comment from oozer
Top marks for this charming trioles, my friend. 'With silken threads of fine-spun gold' I would be inclined to
change to: With filigree of fine-spun gold. the word filigree comes from: filum- latin for thread; and granum- latin for grain. Take care.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Top marks for this charming trioles, my friend. 'With silken threads of fine-spun gold' I would be inclined to
change to: With filigree of fine-spun gold. the word filigree comes from: filum- latin for thread; and granum- latin for grain. Take care.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Thank you for your kind words and taking the time to review.
Steve
Comment from Donya Quijote
I have read this poem several times today. Triolets are new to me as I don't recall reading any in French as I explored French literature a few years ago. I do believe the form is French. I could be wrong. And I don't know much about the different types of meter, although I would like to know more. Since I have to read poetry aloud to get a feel for it, I know meter plays an important function and plays a role in establishing its rhythm and flow. You poem has a nice rhythm and flows gently to its conclusion. What I really like about your poem is its descriptive quality. You actually paint a sunrise with your words. No need for a picture, though you have chosen a fine one to go with your poem. Beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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I have read this poem several times today. Triolets are new to me as I don't recall reading any in French as I explored French literature a few years ago. I do believe the form is French. I could be wrong. And I don't know much about the different types of meter, although I would like to know more. Since I have to read poetry aloud to get a feel for it, I know meter plays an important function and plays a role in establishing its rhythm and flow. You poem has a nice rhythm and flows gently to its conclusion. What I really like about your poem is its descriptive quality. You actually paint a sunrise with your words. No need for a picture, though you have chosen a fine one to go with your poem. Beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 13-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Yes it comes from French Literature but back in mediaeval times which could be why you missed it.
Thank you for the very kind words - yes, I tried hard on the description, which may not be enough to win this contest....
Steve
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It was a winner in my book, regardless of the contest's outcome.
Comment from amarherig14
Beautiful poem describing the sunrise: "With silken threads of fine -spun gold".Then it goes to mention what her love does to your heart:"Set free my heart from wintry cold". A gem of a poem.Well written with good rhyme and flow. The art used intensifies the beauty of the write. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Beautiful poem describing the sunrise: "With silken threads of fine -spun gold".Then it goes to mention what her love does to your heart:"Set free my heart from wintry cold". A gem of a poem.Well written with good rhyme and flow. The art used intensifies the beauty of the write. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 13-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Thank you for your kind words and taking the time to review.
Steve
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You are welcome,Steve. Warm regards,Margie
Comment from Robert Lee Brown
A very good triolet. I like the way you weave light and night with golden threads. Very effective. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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A very good triolet. I like the way you weave light and night with golden threads. Very effective. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 13-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Thank you for your kind words and taking the time to review.
Steve
Comment from Mastery
Outstanding poetry, kiwi. You take the reader away from the everyday rigors with your fine choice of words and encouragement in this poem. Bravo! Bob
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Outstanding poetry, kiwi. You take the reader away from the everyday rigors with your fine choice of words and encouragement in this poem. Bravo! Bob
Comment Written 13-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Thank you, Bob, for your kind words and taking the time to review.
I have been off the site for a while - I must take time to catch up with your family story.
Steve
Steve
Comment from DALLAS01
Wow the art work really woke me up. Wonderful personification and vivid imagery combines to make this a really nice poem.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Wow the art work really woke me up. Wonderful personification and vivid imagery combines to make this a really nice poem.
Comment Written 13-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Thank you for your kind words and taking the time to review.
Steve
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you're welcome
Comment from justchillin
Amazing poem, a true joy to read, with stunning artwork. I especially like the line 'dark shadows' fears are put to flight. This description easily allows me to visualise golden light cleansing all fears, and gently carrying them away. Well done
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Amazing poem, a true joy to read, with stunning artwork. I especially like the line 'dark shadows' fears are put to flight. This description easily allows me to visualise golden light cleansing all fears, and gently carrying them away. Well done
Comment Written 13-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Thank you for your kind words and taking the time to review.
Steve
Comment from Denise S
Your poem reminded me of how wonderful it is to welcome a new day. It is always so fascinateing. Your poem was nicely written. I liked it.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Your poem reminded me of how wonderful it is to welcome a new day. It is always so fascinateing. Your poem was nicely written. I liked it.
Comment Written 13-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Thank you, Denise, for your kind words and taking the time to review.
Steve
Comment from BLACKDYKE
I'm not bothered about the poetic
form kiwi' because this is sooooo
beautiful. Rhythmic and with a new
idea to boot.
It's a fiver from me. Eric
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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I'm not bothered about the poetic
form kiwi' because this is sooooo
beautiful. Rhythmic and with a new
idea to boot.
It's a fiver from me. Eric
Comment Written 13-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2012
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Thank you, Eric, for your kind words and taking the time to review.
Steve
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my pleasure
