Reviews from

Steve's Story-Poems

Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "Murphy's Bar"
A collection of my poems

50 total reviews 
Comment from Cragler
Excellent
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A wonderful idea for a poem it works exceptionally well in this case. The poem is funny and witty and a joy to read. It races along a goodly pace and the reader just wants more. A job well done

 Comment Written 10-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thanks for the lovely review - glad you enjoyed.
Comment from Janet Foor
Excellent
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Laughing out loud. I loved your Husband and WIfe Talking poem "Murphy's Bar". Your drew us in with the sweet talk from beginning. The twist and turns were delightful. Very nice read.

 Comment Written 10-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thanks for the lovely review - glad you enjoyed.
Comment from Chris Tee
Excellent
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Your poem is actually funny as well. You used some cliches here that I liked such as :"I have it from the horse's mouth; The pot may call the kettle black" to mention a few. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 10-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thanks, Chris.
    Don't try this at home.
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow! This is very skillfully written and SOOO hilarious.
I really like the way you made the gradual change from a respectful conversation to a knockdown-dragout brawl.

 Comment Written 10-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thank you, Janice. I'll take that as a big compliment coming from a retired English teacher - I'm almost at that point myself (born the same year as you)
    Glad you enjoyed this piece of fun - yes the change from lovey-dovey to vitriolic was the main idea that first came into my head - the rest just happened, as it tends to do with me.
    Lots more in similar vein if you ever have time to pick through my portfolio.
    Whoops! Just realised you can't do that if you don't know who I am...
Comment from nancyjam
Excellent
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This is hilarious. How sweet they start out and
progress to their true feelings in
comical rhyming couplets.
I really enjoyed this and hope you
do well in the contest.

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thanks. Glad you enjoyed my bit of fun. I started with the idea of gradually changing from lovey-dovey to vitriolic.
Comment from mommerry
Excellent
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That was quite a story told in verse and well-rhymed. This was a job well-done and I have no suggestions for improvement. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thanks. Glad you enjoyed my bit of fun. I started with the idea of gradually changing from lovey-dovey to vitriolic.
Comment from gramalot8
Excellent
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Msytery Poet, this is a good poem worthy fo the recognition you received. Good job of the conversation and the dialog as required by the contest. Good luck.

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thanks. Glad you enjoyed my bit of fun. I started with the idea of gradually changing from lovey-dovey to vitriolic.
Comment from Poetic, Just Is.
Excellent
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This is great. I really enjoyed it. You followed all the rules, well done!

It was nice to see the presentation also. It made for an easier read.

I totally enjoyed this

Cat

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thanks, Cat. Glad you enjoyed my bit of fun.
Comment from HPicasso
Excellent
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This is a great poem of husband and wife dialogue.
Your different colors for the voices is a great idea.
The whole thing was just too funny for words!
Good luck in the contest!
The rhyme and meter are perfect.
Well done!

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Thanks. Glad you enjoyed my bit of fun. I started with the idea of gradually changing from lovey-dovey to vitriolic.
Comment from uniqueauthor
Excellent
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Sounds like a truly happy union, it does.
Neither is more guilty that they other one
For the affair has just begun.
The pot my call the kettle black, but look who won the prize, pretty shrew wife.

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2012
    Ah, but perhaps his subtle plan was to get her out of the house so he could enjoy a romp with the well-endowed barmaid, June!
    Thanks for reviewing.
reply by uniqueauthor on 10-Apr-2012
    You're welcome. Peace for tody