Money, Money, Who's Got the Money?
Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "Money: Double Cross? "Two bank robbers hide in a women's boarding house.
16 total reviews
Comment from ameen786
Bravo! My friend I applaud your wonderful sense of cohesiveness, how you keep all the characters is sync with their respective genre and still maintain the solid plot so full of intigue, bravo!
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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Bravo! My friend I applaud your wonderful sense of cohesiveness, how you keep all the characters is sync with their respective genre and still maintain the solid plot so full of intigue, bravo!
Comment Written 20-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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Thank you, sweetheart. Got a couple fours on this from readers who just walked in and even with the background, couldn't be objective about reviewing.
Comment from randomzed
O.K.
I want to be fair & objective.
This is an excerpt.
Admittedly, I've come in during the middle of this play.
It appears like something I'd like to know more about.
Nevertheless, some spelling seems an error, not purposefully mis-spelled.
All people involved seem to have a few lights out in their marquee, but I believe this is on purpose.
All in all, it's proof one should not walk in during the middle of a play.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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O.K.
I want to be fair & objective.
This is an excerpt.
Admittedly, I've come in during the middle of this play.
It appears like something I'd like to know more about.
Nevertheless, some spelling seems an error, not purposefully mis-spelled.
All people involved seem to have a few lights out in their marquee, but I believe this is on purpose.
All in all, it's proof one should not walk in during the middle of a play.
Comment Written 20-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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I always forget to post this as part of an ongoing work. And also it's a farce with silly characters and silly situations.I went on spell check and only found on unintended misspellings.
Four stars suggests a needed improvement and more than just one misspelled word. But still, I'm glad you want to know more.
Comment from shy1250
ROTFLMAO!! this needs 2 hit tv, the sooner the better!! Great job of mixxing action and dialogue, great job showing bad losers at work, great job getting the gal down on hands and knees looking 4 contact lens--this has real promise. Only 'mebbe' error I saw was punctuation, but I've noticed between write and post the punctuation can change. Go figure!! later and God bless, shy
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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ROTFLMAO!! this needs 2 hit tv, the sooner the better!! Great job of mixxing action and dialogue, great job showing bad losers at work, great job getting the gal down on hands and knees looking 4 contact lens--this has real promise. Only 'mebbe' error I saw was punctuation, but I've noticed between write and post the punctuation can change. Go figure!! later and God bless, shy
Comment Written 20-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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Yes, it's a real challenge to post these plays. I go back and forth trying to catch the spags. Thank you so much for the sixer.
And for your remarks on getting it on the small screen.
Comment from LilHippie
Uh oh! Too nutty! Will he shoot Mack? Will he then shoot Kandy? Will the police ever arrive? No, he ruined that 911 call. Hmmm. . . . No, don't tell me. Very funny and very well written. Every time I see "new writing by Spitfire" I say "Yay! The crazy ladies!" Cannot wait for more! I love this.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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Uh oh! Too nutty! Will he shoot Mack? Will he then shoot Kandy? Will the police ever arrive? No, he ruined that 911 call. Hmmm. . . . No, don't tell me. Very funny and very well written. Every time I see "new writing by Spitfire" I say "Yay! The crazy ladies!" Cannot wait for more! I love this.
Comment Written 20-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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You really lift me up, Lil. I hope nobody expected this to happen. I love twists and turns in a novel, play, or movie.
Comment from TammyGail
Lololo..Damn :) closing with "Now I lay me down"
that just hooks the reader in for the next act
Your always master with scripts Spitfire
Sometimes I stay away from them many I read are well boring as hell, not with yours and this was yet another fine example of such, thanks for sharing it was a pleasure to read and review..
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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Lololo..Damn :) closing with "Now I lay me down"
that just hooks the reader in for the next act
Your always master with scripts Spitfire
Sometimes I stay away from them many I read are well boring as hell, not with yours and this was yet another fine example of such, thanks for sharing it was a pleasure to read and review..
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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Thank you so much, Tammy for your high praise. I do love writing just dialogue and not having to bother with description.
Comment from rjuselius
this definitely needs a few chapters more. i got a bit lost with the characters and who was who. and where is this setting taking place? what's in the briefcase? have you written an introduction to this? i'd love to read it.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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this definitely needs a few chapters more. i got a bit lost with the characters and who was who. and where is this setting taking place? what's in the briefcase? have you written an introduction to this? i'd love to read it.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2012
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Sorry, I forgot to put in this was part of a whole. I did give a brief background, but the women are all introduced in the first scene. You can click on any scene now that I have properly posted it. Maybe I'll add more notes for those just tuning. It doesn't make much sense standing along. The briefcase is full of stolen money. It takes place in a condemned boarding house. The women are all down on their luck. Hope this helps. Thanks for tuning in.
