Reviews from

Along the Jericho Road

Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "A Blood-Red Moon "
Murder Mystery

56 total reviews 
Comment from Author Unknown
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I'm intrigued as to what this murderer has against the priest!! This chapter continues to pull us in Bev...very good dialogue in combination with narration. You know how to end these with a cliff-hanging draw. :) I'm sitting here trying to decipher what all this has to do with the Native Americans. Most interesting. :) x. A.

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 17-Dec-2013
    Well, it might be said he has good reason which becomes more clear as the story progresses. Thanks so much, buddy, your insights are so helpful and will be all part of the revision pool. Hugs, Bev
Comment from CALLAHANMR
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I'm new to your writing and I'm really glad I found it. I had to go back and start from the beginning. You had me hooked right away. I noticed that one reviewer compared it to Father Dowling. The writer that came to my mind is one of my favorites, the late Tony Hillerman. The combination of Native American mysticism and Catholicism is intriguing. I see a winner here. The viewpoint question has also been brought up, but it doesn't bother me. I have one question just out of curiosity. The name Debra Padget reminds me of the beautiful young actress who played a Native American in the movie Broken Arrow. Is that just a coincidence? Best wishes, Marilyn

 Comment Written 07-Jun-2013


reply by the author on 08-Jun-2013
    Hi, Marilyn. I'm really honored by this gracious and very generous review. I consider Tony Hillerman one of the finest mysery writers of his generation. Your oberservation is most humbling. And I am surprised at the fact that Debra Padget was in that movie. I've never seen it, but I do remember it. I loved the stars of the 40's and 50's so much, but don't recall ever seeing a movie of hers. I will have to check it out.

    I know that reading through my novel again when I begin the extensive editing process, I will find some chapters that won't work as well as others and that my writing has changed as I've gone along - the influence of reviews, classes and books on writing. POV is definitely one of my boogaboos, so I'm trying to stay on top of that.

    Long-winded response :0)

    Thanks you for getting it, Marilyn. That means so much to me. And I appreciate, once again, your supportive insights.

    Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from justjo66
Excellent
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Wow, the suspense is really increasing right off the bat.
I'm enjoying reading your work very much. Your descriptions
put me right in the scene. I'm afraid that is where I'm often weak...I tend to get to the point too fast. ;o) I would like to ask a question, however, does the first paragraph about the geese have any underlying meaning or is it just setting the scene?
Thanks

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 01-Feb-2013
    Hi, justjo. Thank you so much for going back to read my chapter - that's very kind of you.

    As to the description of the geese, my intention was to show the continuity of nature, as opposed to events in the human realm. Also, I wanted it as a means of showing that the 'death' of winter was coming. Thanks for asking. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from eowyn0003
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Once again you provide an excellent read. I assume (and we know what that does) you are using omniscient POV. Are you sure that's the best POV. I think it works, just asking so I am not surprised later.

Lura

 Comment Written 20-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 20-Dec-2012
    Well, I'm going to freely admit that I have been learning as I've gone along with this novel. I gravitated toward that POV as a rookie. I may not stick with it for my subsquent novels (though this one will have to stay consistent). Some folks do it very well, like charlie, but it's a bit off-putting sometimes. So, I do appreciate your sharing that insight and your very generous review, Lura.
reply by eowyn0003 on 20-Dec-2012
    I know how precious those six star ratings are, you deserve it. The thing about omniscient POV is it isn't used too often now days. Personally I don't mind it -- although you might want to use limited omniscient where you have insight into your murder and one other character. Just a suggestion.

    Lura
reply by eowyn0003 on 20-Dec-2012
    I will read more of it as I go along. It may be a few days before you hear from me again.

    Lura
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2012
    Lura, I'm just thrilled with the interest and insights you've already shown! I know this is a busy time of year. Thanks again, Bev
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2012
    And I do appreciate your suggestion. I'm always learning from my reviewers and love getting the helpful feedback. POV is a tricky beast to conquer, at least it is for me LOL. Thanks for the information. :0) Bev
reply by eowyn0003 on 20-Dec-2012
    Your welcome.

    Lura
Comment from Jean Lutz
Excellent
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The ending begs the reader to go on. Is the good priest to be his next victim. Or is now a spiritual battle to be continued. Very suspenseful.

 Comment Written 07-Oct-2012


reply by the author on 07-Oct-2012
    There is a spiritual battle brewing that's going to involve several people. I thank you for reading and so generously reviewing, Jean. Hugs, Bev
Comment from Joy Graham
Excellent
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You have my attenion with this story, Bev! I had a strange dream last night about being chased through a church by a crazy priest. I can't remember it enough to write about it. Funny how I would find this story today to remind me of it.

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 28-Sep-2012
    Whoo boy, we're meeting on some otherworldly plain. That's so cool! Thanks so much, Joy.

    Love ya, Bev
Comment from gazzagodbod
Excellent
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love to see them geese geese flying in there v formation it amazes me how they all know how to do it lol thanks love your work my friend gazzaxx

 Comment Written 25-Apr-2012


reply by the author on 25-Apr-2012
    Thanks so much, gazza. I really appreciate the supportive and generous review. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from LAFraser
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a great chapter in a wonderful story. I am certainly enjoying this read. Now, on to A Graveyard Moon. Thanks for posting. :)
~Eilish

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2012


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2012
    Thanks so much, Eilish. I so appreciate your interest in the novel. And your generous review! Cheers, Bev
reply by LAFraser on 19-Mar-2012
    You're welcome, Bev. :)
    Have a great night, my friend.
    ~Eilish
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2012
    You, too, Eilish.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another great chapter, my friend..
good clear descriptive writing, which
makes it a pleasure to read.

self-pity
inheritence
inheritance
Anxiety began to leach his euphoria[;](,) when, at last, the one he'd been waiting for arrived - by using a semi-colon you are separating this sentence (if that makes sense) - I feel the semi-colon needs to be a comma

Margaret

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2012


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2012
    Thank you, Margaret. I really appreciate your great review and taking time to improve some of the areas. I'll be sure to make the changes. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from hyway94
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I must have missed something in the story. What is the message that he left? This is a really good story and I tried but could find no mistakes. Very good, keep it up.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2012


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2012
    Hi, hyway. This is only the second chapter in the novel and I've got about twenty more to go. So, the message and other details have going to be spread out over that length. Hope you will stop by again! And thanks for the great review. Bev