Stained Glassed Heart
Freestyle poem.11 total reviews
Comment from Jean Lutz
Mike, I am honored. I love how poetry becomes alive. A word here or there takes root and soon another poem sprouts. Both your words and art are stunning.
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2012
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Mike, I am honored. I love how poetry becomes alive. A word here or there takes root and soon another poem sprouts. Both your words and art are stunning.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2012
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When I came here, I was fortunate to see this myself and be credited for sparking a couple of imaginations. It seemed fair to usually explain my inspirations in the notes. Considering I am also involved in a poetry discussion groups, I know what they come up with when the author doesn't leave notes behind!
I thank you very much for your compliments and this review and hope all is well with you. Reading your poem was a fruitfull honor for me, as it gave me the idea on the much needed imagery to convey a long held poetic view. Mike
Comment from adewpearl
my heart on an alter - altar - this occurs several places in the poem
good alliteration in sharded shapes
it's grand design - drop the apostrophe
good alliteration in prepared to pay a price
excellent expression of heartfelt expression Brooke
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2012
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my heart on an alter - altar - this occurs several places in the poem
good alliteration in sharded shapes
it's grand design - drop the apostrophe
good alliteration in prepared to pay a price
excellent expression of heartfelt expression Brooke
Comment Written 05-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2012
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That's why I slapped a freestyle on it. I could have put that at the beginning or at the end, but this is intended to be a song and that would be the short chorus. I did attempt to change the inflection of heart on an alter, with a qualifier. I see your point about it's and will change it most likely tomorrow. Because of the graphics, I have to use photoshop and actually already spent about a day in a half, fighting things to make it work out right. Just need a bit of a break to gather some courage to touch it again.
I enjoyed the review and thank you for it and the compliments. Mike
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my only comment about alter is that it should be spelled altar, and you misspell it each time
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I got you, it's amazing that no one else picked up on it, so I will put out a new version late tonnight when I get home from work.
Comment from misscookie
This uis a very deeop poem
I like how you express your emotion behind the stain glass and once it is reveiled you undrestand the reasons why.
Thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2012
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This uis a very deeop poem
I like how you express your emotion behind the stain glass and once it is reveiled you undrestand the reasons why.
Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 05-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2012
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I thank you for the compliments and this review. It just struck me how we try to protect our heart and in doing so, deny it what the heart itself cherishes the most. Mike
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Your very welcome and that is so true.
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Mike,
Your picture and presentation is flawless. I like the notion of keeping one's heart behind stained glass. That is so clever and compelling. This is an accomplished free verse with excellent verbiage and smooth slow. Well done...chey
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2012
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Hi Mike,
Your picture and presentation is flawless. I like the notion of keeping one's heart behind stained glass. That is so clever and compelling. This is an accomplished free verse with excellent verbiage and smooth slow. Well done...chey
Comment Written 05-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2012
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Wow! The word, "flawless," is truly flattering and if anyone knew the truth, they would be rolling on the ground laughing. I actually had this ready to post Saturday night after half a days work, but decided to destroy it and start over due to the fact I didn't like how it all went together. Then for the entire Sunday, I had to go back and fix problems such as typos and repeating stanzas, figuring out why I had it in one type face and not the last one I used. Ended up at version G. Arrg! I went from wondering why it wasn't getting reviewed, to hoping people won't review it. It wasn't until late last night that I was happy I got everything right, and afraid to look at it again this morning.
I appreciate the compliments especially on the free verse and smooth flow as I hope to shop this one around for a song. Origionally I wasn't going to have a two line verse that repeats itself, but I found a way to make it sound good for use with a poem. I thank you for the compliments and this review. Mike
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You are welcome, Mike
Comment from Irene D. Garces
It was good for you to have the courage to post this beautiful poem in Fanstory. And it is equally good for me too to have read this piece too.
Yes, there are times when we are down and sad that we'd rather hide our tears from others. We'd rather stay in a room and pour out everything without the fear of being noticed by others outside.
It is true that when we are happy, others share that happiness. But when we are sad, sometimes, we are alone...
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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It was good for you to have the courage to post this beautiful poem in Fanstory. And it is equally good for me too to have read this piece too.
Yes, there are times when we are down and sad that we'd rather hide our tears from others. We'd rather stay in a room and pour out everything without the fear of being noticed by others outside.
It is true that when we are happy, others share that happiness. But when we are sad, sometimes, we are alone...
Comment Written 04-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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I love the last line, yet some people have their own considerations on what happiness is and the pursuit of it, yet hide what are them true selves. I thank you so much for your compliments and this wonderful review. Mike
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You're welcome, Friend. Thanks too for sharing. God bless.
Comment from MParasmal
Hello Mike K2!
A good enjoyable poem.I've never read such a poem before. For me it's a new style of writing.The last few stanzas,you've repeated as a whole.Any specific reason (Just for knowledge)or some strong emotion conveyed by repetition.
Anyways,A good poem over all.
MITA.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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Hello Mike K2!
A good enjoyable poem.I've never read such a poem before. For me it's a new style of writing.The last few stanzas,you've repeated as a whole.Any specific reason (Just for knowledge)or some strong emotion conveyed by repetition.
Anyways,A good poem over all.
MITA.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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I'm afraid the closest I can come for a specific reason for the repetition is either my computer doesn't like me, or enjoys messing with my mind. NOLOL A poem like this is actually done in Photoshop as it involves incorperating the poem into the graphic design, so you work with layers. Layers for the background, the photos and the text blocks. Somewhere along the line the program glitched or I erred. I worked for half a day on this poem yesterday and scrapped it, feeling that I need to better do the graphics. A change one needs to make can become an ordeal as you have to call up the hi-res photoshop file, then redo it. From there you convert it to JPEG which is a graphics file everyone else's computer can read, but you send it to a photo holding site, then get a HTML code and paste it in here. See what I mean?
I do thank you for pointing it out and made the change of removing the repetition. I also thank you for the compliments and this review. Mike
Comment from Winslow
Dear Michael,
The challange is to the mistress who can break down the barrier. See beyond the stain and realize that your heart is just like any other. Why not let your true self show, instead of hiding behind a glass door?
Warm regards,
Winslow
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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Dear Michael,
The challange is to the mistress who can break down the barrier. See beyond the stain and realize that your heart is just like any other. Why not let your true self show, instead of hiding behind a glass door?
Warm regards,
Winslow
Comment Written 04-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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This was actually guided towards a female singer, and I quite agree with you. Unfortunately, with the way society is, I know the stained glassed heart very well. LOL I thank you for the compliments and this review. Mike
Comment from Escapeherfate
I loved this. It can pertain to so manny different situations of the heart, and It is beautifully crafted. It speaks for itself, this poem is elegant and I can relate.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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I loved this. It can pertain to so manny different situations of the heart, and It is beautifully crafted. It speaks for itself, this poem is elegant and I can relate.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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I intended this as a song, but that is something someone would have to help me work it in, I had rock in mind, but wondered how this would fare in country, but don't have the in's on music to get an honest opinion.
I really enjoyed this review because it told me that the poem was emotionally on the mark. In regards to the singer, I wanted to present a certain certitude and mockery, but relay a little vulnerability and fear as well. For the listener, I wanted them to feel the singer's attitude, feel a little put off; as well wonder if he is being mocked, but to soften it a bit with the foot in the door feeling.
I thank you for the review and wow! Those compliments. Mike
Comment from Magics02
A first of a kind poem for me to read and I just love it. It tells a story to the reader and it also gives a subtle warning behind that glass. I really am admired of the photo work and the poetic verses. Great job here!
Blessings
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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A first of a kind poem for me to read and I just love it. It tells a story to the reader and it also gives a subtle warning behind that glass. I really am admired of the photo work and the poetic verses. Great job here!
Blessings
Comment Written 04-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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Well the photowork was actually very basic and more photojournaliastic in terms of the singer. The photoshop work on the other hand was a royal pain in the butt. I worked on it until late last night, and ended up scraping it and totally doing over including redesigning it. From there, I developed problems with posting it online and carrying it over here and hope to work a little magic in that regards.
I really appreciate this wonderful rating, the compliments and this review.
In regards to the first sentance, I don't know the aspect you are referring to, be it the graphics and design or how the actual poem was written. In the case of many of my poems, I think about them as bats in the cave and work out the individual elements, then let them find the form that bests gets them out. In this case, I tried to put the verse more like rock lyrics with changes in the tempo or to allow a little musical alliteration. Such as for, "I keep my heart on an alter
behind stained glass!" to have it sung with church type music being played, but with electric guitars instead of the pipe organ, yet sound in that manor. Mike
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I just loved the way it flowed and read that is what I meant. Look forward to reading more of your work. Bravo Mike! Nice to meet you also
Comment from rightforyou
Sweet I enjoyed reading this poem and the story behind it ...Reminds me of the poets corner in the Abby and the stained glass that hangs there...speaking words of poets and those who are remembered there...Well Done ...Ron
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reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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Sweet I enjoyed reading this poem and the story behind it ...Reminds me of the poets corner in the Abby and the stained glass that hangs there...speaking words of poets and those who are remembered there...Well Done ...Ron
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2012
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I thank you for your compliments and this review. Mike
