Sunset In Sheridan
Quitin' time ...36 total reviews
Comment from adewpearl
love the whore's bed simile
He rubbed his gelding's steaming back - add apostrophe for possessive
excellent description of setting
you get into Charley's innermost thoughts effectively
you describe his aging well, too
a coyote sang it's song - drop the apostrophe
What a poignant, beautiful conclusion :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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love the whore's bed simile
He rubbed his gelding's steaming back - add apostrophe for possessive
excellent description of setting
you get into Charley's innermost thoughts effectively
you describe his aging well, too
a coyote sang it's song - drop the apostrophe
What a poignant, beautiful conclusion :-) Brooke
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi there!! A thousand thank you's for this kind and very much appreciated review! I am so glad you enjoyed...please forgive me this late note?? HUG, Susan
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, susan, you did a great job writing the story of the man who went silently in the night and his horse was left without the answers he sought. beautiful story
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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this is very well written, susan, you did a great job writing the story of the man who went silently in the night and his horse was left without the answers he sought. beautiful story
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi Pam! Thank you for the constellation of stars! A real honor...even after three years. I am honored by your time for me too..I am so far back I will never get caught up. Love, Susan
Comment from Spiritual Echo
This western theme is in your blood. There are brilliant lines in this story, The Wyoming wind playing with jackrabbits...pain said howdy...beat the dark to the door.
This is another six for sure...maybe the beginning of an unusual book....something about 'old-timers' last day on the prairie' That's two in a row that are so real it's almost as if you are regressing into an old lifetime. These old guys breathe through your words and your move into the prairies is effortless and authentic.
Very, very, very good. ******+
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2012
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This western theme is in your blood. There are brilliant lines in this story, The Wyoming wind playing with jackrabbits...pain said howdy...beat the dark to the door.
This is another six for sure...maybe the beginning of an unusual book....something about 'old-timers' last day on the prairie' That's two in a row that are so real it's almost as if you are regressing into an old lifetime. These old guys breathe through your words and your move into the prairies is effortless and authentic.
Very, very, very good. ******+
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2012
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Hi Ingrid! Wow...thank you. And the little sixer is great too! :) You're the best Ingrid...I wish I'd been born a boy out west. Oh well. I will live it here...lol! I'm counting down the minutes now...wish me luck? I hope the docs are on the up and up. AND I hope you are feeling better too my friend. I wish I could take your pain away for you. xoxo, Susan
Comment from Sasha
This deserves a 10 star rating and I don't even have a 6 left to give you. I just LOVED this. Your imagery is awesome: Dark as black velvet on a whore's bed; an endless abyss that a man could fall into and drown...but pain said howdy...and, The Wyoming wind played tag with the jackrabbits are all simply awesome. I know I've said this before but this is truly one of your best yet.
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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This deserves a 10 star rating and I don't even have a 6 left to give you. I just LOVED this. Your imagery is awesome: Dark as black velvet on a whore's bed; an endless abyss that a man could fall into and drown...but pain said howdy...and, The Wyoming wind played tag with the jackrabbits are all simply awesome. I know I've said this before but this is truly one of your best yet.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi there!! A thousand thank you's for this kind and very much appreciated review! I am so glad you enjoyed...please forgive me this late note?? HUG, Susan
Comment from N.K. Wagner
First, Suse, I'm gonna get the work out of the way:
He rubbed his geldings - 's
Good days work." - 's
Now for the fun part. This isn't exactly a story, but rather a character study and recounting of a man's last few hours of life. It's sensitive without being sentimental, and that's perfect for the character. But the real reason for the 6 is your imagery. Your description of the velvet night and the wind playing tag... Lady, look at what you're capable of! This is professional-quality good. And the horse's distress is perfection. Now go write something else with a more formal ss structure and this kind of imagery. This is outstanding work. :) Nancy
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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First, Suse, I'm gonna get the work out of the way:
He rubbed his geldings - 's
Good days work." - 's
Now for the fun part. This isn't exactly a story, but rather a character study and recounting of a man's last few hours of life. It's sensitive without being sentimental, and that's perfect for the character. But the real reason for the 6 is your imagery. Your description of the velvet night and the wind playing tag... Lady, look at what you're capable of! This is professional-quality good. And the horse's distress is perfection. Now go write something else with a more formal ss structure and this kind of imagery. This is outstanding work. :) Nancy
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi Nancy!! Oh thank you...I am so sorry for yet another late note of thanks...I should expand this one someday. I will try. I stick to the short stories, due to lack of energy and pain...and it's so frustrating. It's all I can do to hang in at all. Please know how much your encouragement means to me...I really appreciate every review, each note you send to me....Thank you again...I'm most sincerely honored...Susan
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Susan,
I love this story. You have captured the life of an old cowboy well. They often suffer from arthritis after so any years in the saddle and hard work. I am happy this story took place in Wyoming! Poor Charley, I was sorry he had to die but he left this earth softly and with no regrets. Well done...bless you, chey
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi Susan,
I love this story. You have captured the life of an old cowboy well. They often suffer from arthritis after so any years in the saddle and hard work. I am happy this story took place in Wyoming! Poor Charley, I was sorry he had to die but he left this earth softly and with no regrets. Well done...bless you, chey
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi Chey! Thank you very much! SO glad you enjoyed this...your state is so beautiful. I remember it well and used to want to live there. Of course, now, I'm too old to do the things like that...I'm just an old 'cowgirl wannabe'! :o) Thank you again! x. Susan
Comment from JW
This was a well written, but sad story. Though it was good that Charley passed on the way he would want, I could not help but feel sorry for his horse. Animals just don't understand. JW
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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This was a well written, but sad story. Though it was good that Charley passed on the way he would want, I could not help but feel sorry for his horse. Animals just don't understand. JW
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi Jonathon! Thank you! I'm glad you thought that! I hoped someone would think of the horse as well! Good for you! And horses are very used to a certain routine too...this sudden being left behind would really cause this behavior! Great review J!! Susan
Comment from c_lucas
Very good use of hyperboles. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery.
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Very good use of hyperboles. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi there...another late thank you, and I do apologize...I am very sorry! Thank you for reading this and for your time...many smiles...Susan
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You're welcome, Susan. Charlie
Comment from shilohgirl15
I loooooved this! The language you used to enhance the scene worked perfectly with the theme of the story. The last sentence to me was a little bit long, but that's just one sentence; I loved it!
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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I loooooved this! The language you used to enhance the scene worked perfectly with the theme of the story. The last sentence to me was a little bit long, but that's just one sentence; I loved it!
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi Miss Shiloh! Please accept my apologies for this late reply? I am so far behind...I am very happy you enjoyed this...your review is wonderful. Hugs and more thank you's!! :o) Susan
Comment from humpwhistle
I like this story, Suse. You know I'm a sucker for westerns. Some really nice language here. And similies and metaphors, too. My kind of writing. Do you think it would be better to add 'together' at the end of the last line? Just a thought.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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I like this story, Suse. You know I'm a sucker for westerns. Some really nice language here. And similies and metaphors, too. My kind of writing. Do you think it would be better to add 'together' at the end of the last line? Just a thought.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 28-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2012
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Hi Lee! I am so sorry for this late note to thank you. It's all I can do to stay online anymore. I am just thrilled and sincerely honored each time you approve of anything I try to do here. Thank you my friend...this means a lot to me...x. Susan
