The Secret
She would take it to her grave.11 total reviews
Comment from ShirleyT
Great story. I was intrigued from the very beginning and did not lose interest as the story progressed. Good writing and story-telling.
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2012
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Great story. I was intrigued from the very beginning and did not lose interest as the story progressed. Good writing and story-telling.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2012
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Thank you Shirley for your kind review of my story. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from gazzagodbod
great little contest this one enjoying all the stories but yours is my favourite so far well done my friend and good luck gazza
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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great little contest this one enjoying all the stories but yours is my favourite so far well done my friend and good luck gazza
Comment Written 07-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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Thank you gazza for your kind review of my story. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from WilliamDeen
What a wonderful story of true love. Sam was a most unique man. He loved her so much he made the boy his own. I believe she must have grown to love him too.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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What a wonderful story of true love. Sam was a most unique man. He loved her so much he made the boy his own. I believe she must have grown to love him too.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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Yes, she did learn to love him very much. I'm glad you liked my story. Thank you for reviewing it.
Comment from elliejean
I love the picture. I love the story. Sam was a good man. His wife turned out pretty good too. At least she didn't have to pay for her stupid child like mistake. It is a true love story Great work.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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I love the picture. I love the story. Sam was a good man. His wife turned out pretty good too. At least she didn't have to pay for her stupid child like mistake. It is a true love story Great work.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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The picture I took one night when I power went out in a storm. I loved the way the candles looked. I am very glad you liked my story. Thank you for reviewing.
Comment from lizmiles
Very evocative writing. Like that you took a different route from the others and chose to approach from a romantic vantage point. Very enjoyable. Best of luck in the contest. Liz
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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Very evocative writing. Like that you took a different route from the others and chose to approach from a romantic vantage point. Very enjoyable. Best of luck in the contest. Liz
Comment Written 07-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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Thank you Liz for your kind review of my story. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from TammyGail
Great work crafting this story I really enjoyed the read, very well written indeed I seen the words you made bold it can be a nightmare at times formatting. Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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Great work crafting this story I really enjoyed the read, very well written indeed I seen the words you made bold it can be a nightmare at times formatting. Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest
Comment Written 07-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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Thank you Tammy for your kind review of my story. This was the first time I had ever tried to write fiction...so wasn't so sure about it. I am glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from Cooper Watt
I prefer the words not be bold. I find the best entries to be those stories where after you've read them, you have to go back and actually search for the words. Putting the words in bold only draws undue attention to the word and becomes a distraction to the story.
I found your story so engrossing that I had to use "Ctrl-F" afterward to makes sure you'd used the words. Well done!
I really did enjoy your story.... Sam was just a guest at Claire & Clarke's party and intuitively knew Thelma was keeping a secret that involved herself and Clarke, and so followed Thelma from the party to offer support, etc. From that sprung a relationship. And as we all know, when you meet the right person, all life's preconceived ideas and plans can easily go straight out the window....
I wish you the best of luck with the contest.
Sincerely,
Coop.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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I prefer the words not be bold. I find the best entries to be those stories where after you've read them, you have to go back and actually search for the words. Putting the words in bold only draws undue attention to the word and becomes a distraction to the story.
I found your story so engrossing that I had to use "Ctrl-F" afterward to makes sure you'd used the words. Well done!
I really did enjoy your story.... Sam was just a guest at Claire & Clarke's party and intuitively knew Thelma was keeping a secret that involved herself and Clarke, and so followed Thelma from the party to offer support, etc. From that sprung a relationship. And as we all know, when you meet the right person, all life's preconceived ideas and plans can easily go straight out the window....
I wish you the best of luck with the contest.
Sincerely,
Coop.
Comment Written 07-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2012
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Thank you Coop for reading and reviewing my story. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from rightforyou
Write a short story that includes these four ingredients: State Trooper,YES Baton Rouge,YES Hamburger,YES Anniversary Party (person, place, thing, event).YES Keep in mind, the story doesn't have to take place in Baton Rouge, doesn't need to include a cop as a main character, nor be about hamburgers, nor focus on an anniversary party of any sort -- the words must simply be woven into your short story as they appear. The story must not exceed 750 words.YES Any genre, any theme, any level of profanity or otherwise grossness is welcome.YES includes all of these
I read this story and feel that all requirements have been met very interesting story that is very well written Thanks...Ron
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2012
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Write a short story that includes these four ingredients: State Trooper,YES Baton Rouge,YES Hamburger,YES Anniversary Party (person, place, thing, event).YES Keep in mind, the story doesn't have to take place in Baton Rouge, doesn't need to include a cop as a main character, nor be about hamburgers, nor focus on an anniversary party of any sort -- the words must simply be woven into your short story as they appear. The story must not exceed 750 words.YES Any genre, any theme, any level of profanity or otherwise grossness is welcome.YES includes all of these
I read this story and feel that all requirements have been met very interesting story that is very well written Thanks...Ron
Comment Written 06-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2012
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Thank you Ron for your kind review. I am glad you liked my story. It's my attempt at writing fiction...so, wasn't so sure. :o)
Comment from Kyle Renton
Magnificent read!! I thoroughly enjoyed it!! It was short but good, the only thing i could think off to say, and I've said it before, it was great!!
Keep it up!!!
Regards
Kyle Renton
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2012
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Magnificent read!! I thoroughly enjoyed it!! It was short but good, the only thing i could think off to say, and I've said it before, it was great!!
Keep it up!!!
Regards
Kyle Renton
Comment Written 06-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2012
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Thanks Kyle for your kind review. I am really glad you liked the read. It's my first attempt at fiction so wasn't so sure of myself. :o)
Comment from ScarletClearwater
I liked the beginning part about how you describe Felma. It was a nice touch that she changed her name. The story would have been more lively to me if there were more dialogue. Dialogue keeps a work dynamic. I understand the limitations of the prompt though. Good job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2012
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I liked the beginning part about how you describe Felma. It was a nice touch that she changed her name. The story would have been more lively to me if there were more dialogue. Dialogue keeps a work dynamic. I understand the limitations of the prompt though. Good job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2012
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Thank you Scarlet for your kind review. Yes, I thought it probably needed some dialogue but since it was my first attempt at fiction just wasn't that sure of myself. I appreciate your suggestion.
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Well your first attempt you did a damn fine job!
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Thanks, that makes me smile. :o)
