Reviews from

Lonely Hearts Meet

Viewing comments for Chapter 44 "part 1 Chapter 14"
Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.

64 total reviews 
Comment from oNray
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another interesting chapter. My brother had a huge akita (spelling) that he could not control. That dog cost him so much in fines, but no way would he get rid of the dog

 Comment Written 13-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 14-Dec-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from alexisleech
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

There was a good build up of pressure here which indicated a calm before the storm. Troy does indeed seem almost too good to be true and is probably exactly what Anna needs after what she's had to endure. A very enjoyable read.

 Comment Written 13-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 14-Dec-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Tonulak
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You managed to layer a lot of tension in a lot of daily routines. You ended the chapter with a dramatic note, by having the dog lunge at the baby. Well-edited and very tight--Ted

 Comment Written 13-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 14-Dec-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from rchitwood
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh!My this is not a good sign I hope Troy gets to Michael before the dog.Your story as always a delightful read.Very good dialogue and characters also believable.I would recommend this to others.Blessings Rita

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 14-Dec-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Nanashirley
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Is this girl ever going to get a break. Troy is almost too good to be true. I wish there were more like him. I saw no need for editing.

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 12-Dec-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from uniqueauthor
Average
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I given this three stars only because I have just joined Fan Story and I haven't had the opportunity to read your previous submissions, but this awakens the desire in me to read the rest of the story.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 12-Dec-2011
    I fail to understand why if you want to read the rest of the story you gave me three stars. Usually when someone gets less than five stars, the reviewer gives suggestions to improve and when the author makes the corrections the reviewer upgrades the rating. You offered no suggestions. I have no idea what I need to do to get the upgrade.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A great chapter without anything worrying
Anna ... or so I thought.... the dog!!

her telephone rang. Her eyes widened as her head
Might I suggest...
the telephone rang... since you have another 2 "her"s right after. I do the same myself...

I'd like to say thank you for your support and encouragement throughout the year, Barbara. Have a wonderful Christams with your family... and I pray for your good health in the coming New Year, my friend.
Margaret

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 17-Dec-2011
    Sorry it took so long to answer your review. I had a really busy week. I appreciate your suggestion. Merry Christmas.
Comment from KATYBUG:)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

this was a very interesting and touching chapter
i like the way you used the italic font to symbolize the characters thinking...
it was very clever and added a lot of inside voice to the story
good job
love
katy

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 12-Dec-2011
    Thank you for the kind review and support.
reply by KATYBUG:) on 14-Dec-2011
    YOUR WELCOME
Comment from tango494
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Again, I love how smoothly and effortlessly you move the reader from ocean to ocean in your story. You do an amazing job with you imagery and I found no grammar issues at all. Another awesome job.

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 12-Dec-2011
    I appreciate the kind review.
Comment from emmaysavage
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You do like those cliffhagers. Thanks for keeping your characters normal without letting the story get dry or predictable.

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2011


reply by the author on 12-Dec-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.