Stand Strong
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Alive and Awake"Social pressures threaten a childhood friendship
87 total reviews
Comment from Drew Delaney
You get a virtual six-star. Sorry I ran out of the real ones. This sounds quite interesting. I've been involved with taking teens to Christian Rock Groups years ago, now. And to youth group and different things. I think it is great that you are attempting this genre here. I have two grandson's brought up in with Christian parents, school and youth groups, band, and everything. Both are in the midst of rebellion. Jesse thinks he should have been a girl. He's 21, and goes to a Christian college in Michigan. Jody got caught smoking marijuana at home. I, as grandmother, remember the days raising my kids, and their rebellious attitudes, but this is ridiculous. It's just heart breaking. Drew xx
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
You get a virtual six-star. Sorry I ran out of the real ones. This sounds quite interesting. I've been involved with taking teens to Christian Rock Groups years ago, now. And to youth group and different things. I think it is great that you are attempting this genre here. I have two grandson's brought up in with Christian parents, school and youth groups, band, and everything. Both are in the midst of rebellion. Jesse thinks he should have been a girl. He's 21, and goes to a Christian college in Michigan. Jody got caught smoking marijuana at home. I, as grandmother, remember the days raising my kids, and their rebellious attitudes, but this is ridiculous. It's just heart breaking. Drew xx
Comment Written 21-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Thanks for taking time to read my chapter, Drew. I appreciate your 'virtual' six! I'm sorry to read about your grandchildren, but I think that the good values instilled by their parents will hold true in the long run. I pray that's the case for you all.
Warm regards,
Bev
Comment from kittykatnoel
I think you mean to leave off the 's in the line starting "Jujee's opened..."
I think the line, "hangers and tucked neatly into the shelves", needs to be reworded or change "into" to "onto".
Wonderful story, I think it will be well received by christian teens and addresses well the issues they face.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
I think you mean to leave off the 's in the line starting "Jujee's opened..."
I think the line, "hangers and tucked neatly into the shelves", needs to be reworded or change "into" to "onto".
Wonderful story, I think it will be well received by christian teens and addresses well the issues they face.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Hi, Kitty. Thank you much for this gracious review and your good suggestions. I appreciate both! :) Bev
Comment from irishauthorme
I really like the way you wrote this. You touched on several subjects that confront Christian teens, but are hard to talk about. Teenagers have such high emotions. Things that are of no consequence to us in our confident maturity are a big deal to them, particularly their appearance.
Modern high schools are a difficult testing ground for Christian teens, who are shunned by many of their peers, who label them "Prudes."
Good story, look forward to your next chapter.
irish
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
I really like the way you wrote this. You touched on several subjects that confront Christian teens, but are hard to talk about. Teenagers have such high emotions. Things that are of no consequence to us in our confident maturity are a big deal to them, particularly their appearance.
Modern high schools are a difficult testing ground for Christian teens, who are shunned by many of their peers, who label them "Prudes."
Good story, look forward to your next chapter.
irish
Comment Written 21-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Hi, Irish. It's so nice to hear from you. Thank you for your very encouraging review. I appreciate you insights and generosity! ;) Bev
Comment from CR Delport
It is nice that you are around long enough you can revive a post :) This is interesting and well written, although I do notice a slight difference in your recent work. It seems more ... polished, if that is the right word. Anyway, good job.
Have a great day.
Christelle.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
It is nice that you are around long enough you can revive a post :) This is interesting and well written, although I do notice a slight difference in your recent work. It seems more ... polished, if that is the right word. Anyway, good job.
Have a great day.
Christelle.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Hehe, yes, I've been on the site about six years now. Have seen too many good writers leave and lots of good writers join.
Thanks for noticing the effort I'm making to me more 'polished', Christelle. I'm working with an excellent editor on my Jericho Road Novel and learning so much!
I appreciate your generosity.
Bev
Comment from MusingsOfMWH
After reading this excerpt of "Stand Strong", I'd like to say you deserve credit for getting the importance of actively living Christian values across to your teen target market via the action and dialogue of your primary characters. Jujee has been consistently showing her disrespectful, superficial nature with a pattern of words and actions; the Skillet concert is your masterful stroke in providing the setting for Mara to take a stand. After getting her feet needlessly chilled and her feelings callously hurt by someone she trusted as her friend, your teen protagonist begins her painful process of growth. Compelling, excellent writing.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
After reading this excerpt of "Stand Strong", I'd like to say you deserve credit for getting the importance of actively living Christian values across to your teen target market via the action and dialogue of your primary characters. Jujee has been consistently showing her disrespectful, superficial nature with a pattern of words and actions; the Skillet concert is your masterful stroke in providing the setting for Mara to take a stand. After getting her feet needlessly chilled and her feelings callously hurt by someone she trusted as her friend, your teen protagonist begins her painful process of growth. Compelling, excellent writing.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Thank you so very much for this comprehensive and most encouraging review. Mara will 'turn her cheek' for a while as she believes Jujee is more confused than mean. What I find is how much we all do that as Christians. But there comes a time when you say enough. It's usually when you learn you're worthy of something better.
I really appreciate this very gracious and generous review, Musing. Great to hear from you.
Warm regards, Bev
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Hi! I'm Michael; when I first got involved with FanStory, I didn't know if it was allowed to use real names, so I tried to get a bit creative. All the best!
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Hi back, Michael. I'll try to remember that for future reference. Good to make your acquaintance. All the best to you, as well.
:) Bev
Comment from Belinda
I find myself wondering: what will happen to Mara. That's how interesting this second part is. There are girls like Jujee everywhere, it seems. Look forward to your next.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
I find myself wondering: what will happen to Mara. That's how interesting this second part is. There are girls like Jujee everywhere, it seems. Look forward to your next.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Thanks so much, Belinda. I appreciate much your encouragement and support.
:) Bev
Comment from boxergirl
Good job, Bev, with the continuation of your story line. Mara having to endure Jujee's attempts to remake her into someone she definitely is not and then abandons her at the concert. But then Gabe shows up and Mara is praying she doesn't mess this up... the question to me is will Gabe be a good guy or a bad guy?
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2015
Good job, Bev, with the continuation of your story line. Mara having to endure Jujee's attempts to remake her into someone she definitely is not and then abandons her at the concert. But then Gabe shows up and Mara is praying she doesn't mess this up... the question to me is will Gabe be a good guy or a bad guy?
Comment Written 20-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2015
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Thanks so much, BG! I appreciate your insights and support. :)
Comment from Jay Squires
You've written a very entertaining and readable chapter to your book. The Young Christian Teen market should be great for your book. It's tough enough for a teen to develop true relationships with others in her peer group--tougher still while staying true to her Christian principles. I enjoy your premise here, Bev and am anxious to see it play out.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2015
You've written a very entertaining and readable chapter to your book. The Young Christian Teen market should be great for your book. It's tough enough for a teen to develop true relationships with others in her peer group--tougher still while staying true to her Christian principles. I enjoy your premise here, Bev and am anxious to see it play out.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2015
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Thanks so much, Jay. It is really rough out there these days. Even more when you have strong principles that fly in the face of so much moral ambiguity.
Your support and generosity mean a lot!
:) Bev
Comment from gypsycaravan
Serves jujee right if Mara gets a 'choice' one. Friend would be a loose term for jujee. I'm glad Mara will have someone to sit with at the concert . Nice work.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2015
Serves jujee right if Mara gets a 'choice' one. Friend would be a loose term for jujee. I'm glad Mara will have someone to sit with at the concert . Nice work.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2015
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Thanks so much, G. Jujee is going to continue to be a burr in Mara's side. :)
Comment from chasennov
A window opens Stand Strong Alive and Awake.' This is an excellent chapter you have created here, Bev. How gorgeous can someone be up close? Well done.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2015
A window opens Stand Strong Alive and Awake.' This is an excellent chapter you have created here, Bev. How gorgeous can someone be up close? Well done.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2015
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Thanks so much, C. It's all about the eyes, my friend. :) Bev
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You are most welcome, Bev. All in the eyes huh? Wonderful. No wonder I'm staring into my wife's eyes all the time.
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Oh, that's so sweet. My husband has beautiful eyes, and a good soul to boot. :) Bev