We Miss You
Lonely Poem-Free verse8 total reviews
Comment from Dominica Fidelis
Beautifully written, your sadness is felt. Your dad would have loved this tribute. I have lost my parents therefore I understand and can truly feel the loss and the ache. Thanks so much for sharing this.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2011
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Beautifully written, your sadness is felt. Your dad would have loved this tribute. I have lost my parents therefore I understand and can truly feel the loss and the ache. Thanks so much for sharing this.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2011
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Thank you for your kind reveiw. Yes, losing my Dad has been an awful thing for me. I miss him every day.
Comment from angel123
Your poem about being lonely, because you miss your father is very well written with nicely written statements like Memories like wispy butterfly wings
settle on me at the strangest times. AND I LOVE THIS STATEMENT:
Your presence so close some days
and other times you seem so far away.
How far is Heaven?
I think your poem is beautiful.
Angel123
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2011
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Your poem about being lonely, because you miss your father is very well written with nicely written statements like Memories like wispy butterfly wings
settle on me at the strangest times. AND I LOVE THIS STATEMENT:
Your presence so close some days
and other times you seem so far away.
How far is Heaven?
I think your poem is beautiful.
Angel123
Comment Written 12-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2011
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Thank you. I am glad you like my poem. I do miss my Dad everyday and he has been gone now for over 9 years.
Comment from elliejean
This is a process of grieving. It starts out as a collective process and then you concentrate on how it effects you personally. There is no good way or time to die. It is an involuntary process and it leaves everyone lonely. Good piece,
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2011
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This is a process of grieving. It starts out as a collective process and then you concentrate on how it effects you personally. There is no good way or time to die. It is an involuntary process and it leaves everyone lonely. Good piece,
Comment Written 12-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2011
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Thank you for your kind review and for helping me understand just a little better the process. You would think as a nurse that would have been clear to me but it is so different when it hits you personally. It is a long process.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, mystery writer, a great job writing this poem about the empty space that death left, vivid emotions, i wish you the best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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this is very well written, mystery writer, a great job writing this poem about the empty space that death left, vivid emotions, i wish you the best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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Thank you for your kind review. The stars are appreciated.
Comment from RYME4U
Very touching and deeply emotional.The longing and yearning are poignantly expressed.The pain of losing a loved one is very real.This poem puts it into words. Good job!
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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Very touching and deeply emotional.The longing and yearning are poignantly expressed.The pain of losing a loved one is very real.This poem puts it into words. Good job!
Comment Written 11-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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Thank you for your kind review. The stars are appreciated.
Comment from juliaSjames
I like this poem. There is a poignant sadness in such lines as "How far is Heaven". Given the information in the author notes, this sounds a wistful echo of childhood journeys with the usual cry, "How far is it to - Daddy?"
Lovely metaphor of "Memories like wispy butterfly wings".
For me there is a slight disconnect between the first and second stanzas since you seem to be writing from different POVs. This may be deliberate - focusing on the family and then narrowing the focus to a single individual. But it still jars a little.
Interesting poem - it stirs the emotions.
Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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I like this poem. There is a poignant sadness in such lines as "How far is Heaven". Given the information in the author notes, this sounds a wistful echo of childhood journeys with the usual cry, "How far is it to - Daddy?"
Lovely metaphor of "Memories like wispy butterfly wings".
For me there is a slight disconnect between the first and second stanzas since you seem to be writing from different POVs. This may be deliberate - focusing on the family and then narrowing the focus to a single individual. But it still jars a little.
Interesting poem - it stirs the emotions.
Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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Thank you for your kind review. Yes, the changing of POV's was intentional. I started out writing in just my point of view but realized it was my entire family that felt the same way. Therefore, I started the poem in the "we" but wanted to bring it to a more personal level by the "I".
Comment from RooBoo
This is beautiful and somber! I love how you poured out your soul and acknowledged the uncertainty of life. It shows wisdom and heart.Admirable!
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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This is beautiful and somber! I love how you poured out your soul and acknowledged the uncertainty of life. It shows wisdom and heart.Admirable!
Comment Written 11-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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Thank you for the review. If you don't mind, do you mind giving me more reasons why you gave me 3 stars. If it's just not your taste in poems...I understand...but if it's something technical, maybe I can work on that. Thanks
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Oh I didn't catch that. I meant to give you 4 stars. I wouldn't change a thing! And yes, it's not really my taste but it was beautiful for what it was!!
Comment from The Stranger
this is a very emotional poem as one would expect given the reason behind it, I am sure your father will be smiling with pride as he looks down from heaven
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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this is a very emotional poem as one would expect given the reason behind it, I am sure your father will be smiling with pride as he looks down from heaven
Comment Written 11-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2011
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Thank you for your kind review of my poem.
