Reviews from

Lonely Hearts Meet

Viewing comments for Chapter 33 "Part three, Chapter 10"
Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.

79 total reviews 
Comment from stanishmichelle
Excellent
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Anna finally got divorced. The judge was easy on Bobby, and he is lucky to have gotten visitation rights if he seeks counseling. He took the ruling calmly, too calmly. Let's hope he remains that way. Oh, I just read the ending. Bobby is a psycho! I am impatient and can't wait for the next chapter.

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Carolyn Hilliard
Excellent
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A volatile chapter. Anna's and Bobby's reactions are so in sync it is scary. Down here in Florida an abusive husband attacked his wife in the court room and gave her two black eyes before the bailiff, police got him off her. When interviewed, the poor woman was afraid for her life. If a spouse is determined, I do fear for the other.

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review. WOW!!!!!
Comment from Rafaqat Bano
Excellent
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Hi
it is good story..... the subject is strong.... seems the srtory of any society ...... problems ..the mis-matched couples have to face.... tention is doubbled in presence of any little kid....grip as a whole is fantastic.......well done ...maturity of writing is far mature than before....good work

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from kiwisteveh
Excellent
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The short sections here move the story on more quickly than usual and the scene in the courthouse plants the seeds for more to come in the next chapters...
As usual your writing is clear, direct and error-free.

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Chris Tee
Excellent
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Wow!! Now the story is getting interesting old sport.
You had me as usual glued to the screen with this splendid write ma'am.
Well done indeed.

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Cheryl Daphine
Excellent
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Sounds like the usual 'soft' judge in these matters. What ever happened to hose whipping and the stocks? Joking but just barely.. Very well written chapter Barbara.

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from nor84
Good
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Hi, Barbara.

"I decree the marriage between Anna Marie Rodgers and Robert Leroy Rodgers be absolved as of today.">>> That has to be dissolved. Absolved doesn't seem to fit. I have heard of dissolution of marriage, which would come from dissolved.

after you have successfully completed anger management and parenting classes(,) you will have restricted visitation every other Saturday afternoon for two hours.>>> Good for the judge!

The glare on his face reminded her, how dangerous he would become.>>> A glare is in the eyes rather than on the face. You might consider revising to:

His glare reminded her how dangerous he could be.>>> I suggest that because she's familiar with his violence.

I think the lady needs a firearm and training to use it. That's what I'd be doing. Good story.

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 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 01-Oct-2011
    Sorry it has taken me so long to answer this review. Again, I had to wait until today so I could make the necessary corrections and study those areas. Hopefully, not to make the same mistakes again.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
Excellent
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Barbara, did I just hear Bobby communicate a threat? In front of a police officer? With his conviction for spousal abuse, charges would result in more jail time. It'd keep him off the streets longer. As it is, Anna's murder seems likely. The PI, and therefore Bobby, knows where she lives. Just sayin'. :) Nancy

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review. It will get more interesting as time rolls along.
Comment from Cynthia Tee
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Good grief, Bobby is a monster! It feels like I want to do something nasty to him. I have just had a thought...how many women abuse their husbands? Does it happen I wonder? This is another good part from a chapter Barbara and you write so descriptively it seems so real! But then for me it was real before. I truly hope that women who read your book will take some advice from this. Thank you for sharing friend. Hugs and smiles, Cynthia xx

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review and your support.
Comment from CALLAHANMR
Excellent
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Hi Barbara:)
This is an excellent post with no unexpected surprises. bobby's testimony on the first day of the trial surely sealed the judge's decision.

Poor Anna can't help feeling panic when she looks at Bobby. She is still intimidated by her ex-husband's past actions and his veiled threat, "I'm glad you're scared. You'll be punished for disobeying me," surly won't make her feel safe.

I hopr the policeman and/or the judge heard what Bobby said. That could be grounds for contempt. I thinka fine or more time in jail should be in order.

I noted one minor problem: On the stand Bobby showed every symptom of an abuser, male supremacy, no accountability for his actions, and cruelty to animals. He didn't come across as caring for his son or apologetic for his actions. The judge should rule in our favor." [He kissed Betty's cheek.] "I'm hungry. When's dinner?" {Too many pronouns. Who kissed Betty's cheek? You need to clarify this paragraph. Perhaps even break it into two paragraphs. Little things like this slow readers and interrupt the flow.}

Love and Irish hugs,

Roger

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2011


reply by the author on 26-Sep-2011
    Thank you for the kind review. I will work on that paragraph.