Lonely Hearts Meet
Viewing comments for Chapter 32 "Part two, Chapter 10"Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.
88 total reviews
Comment from NaughtieScribe
Bobby's mother is really getting on my last nerve. I hope her rights to Michael are also restricted. It's clear that Anna was in a now win situation from the start. Even if I hadn't started later in the story, I would still see how bad this is going to get before it gets better. Okay last time, just one more chapter.
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012
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Bobby's mother is really getting on my last nerve. I hope her rights to Michael are also restricted. It's clear that Anna was in a now win situation from the start. Even if I hadn't started later in the story, I would still see how bad this is going to get before it gets better. Okay last time, just one more chapter.
Comment Written 02-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012
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Thank you.
Comment from HPicasso
Dear Barbara:
You have written an interesting and unique chapter. Another and another best and excellent chapter to enjoyed. I admire the way of writting, I wish I can do something like this.. Very beautiful.
Best wishes...
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Dear Barbara:
You have written an interesting and unique chapter. Another and another best and excellent chapter to enjoyed. I admire the way of writting, I wish I can do something like this.. Very beautiful.
Best wishes...
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Terra Dane
Having not read previous chapters and not being a huge romance fan by any measure, comment on story would be out of place, seems to me. But hats off for careful writing, for measured lines, for taking time to write it right.
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Having not read previous chapters and not being a huge romance fan by any measure, comment on story would be out of place, seems to me. But hats off for careful writing, for measured lines, for taking time to write it right.
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Denise S
You really did a good job here. You told the story well. Your story really helped me to understand more about what happens in the courts. it is so complicated
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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You really did a good job here. You told the story well. Your story really helped me to understand more about what happens in the courts. it is so complicated
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Jay Squires
Excellent read, Barbara. Your courtroom narrative and dialogue sparkled. I Don't have courtroom experience, so I have no direct knowledge that you were accurate... but there was a feeling of verisimilitude in your prose. I have a hunch you have experience with the court system... or you did a heck of a lot of research.
Good read,
Jay
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Excellent read, Barbara. Your courtroom narrative and dialogue sparkled. I Don't have courtroom experience, so I have no direct knowledge that you were accurate... but there was a feeling of verisimilitude in your prose. I have a hunch you have experience with the court system... or you did a heck of a lot of research.
Good read,
Jay
Comment Written 22-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from ulster3
Hello, barbara...
You have written an interesting chapter which is well researched. However having spent many hours in family court, I know Eric would have coached his client, and never allowed him to say things like he "disciplined" his wife, etc. He would have coached him even about how to respond to Paul, but the opposing atty can rile someone. It may be helpful to think about changing that testimony or indicating why Eric was unable to control the responses he got from the stand. I know you would want me to say...
Just trying to be helpful on technicalities...the writing is excellent. Warmly, Rebecca
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Hello, barbara...
You have written an interesting chapter which is well researched. However having spent many hours in family court, I know Eric would have coached his client, and never allowed him to say things like he "disciplined" his wife, etc. He would have coached him even about how to respond to Paul, but the opposing atty can rile someone. It may be helpful to think about changing that testimony or indicating why Eric was unable to control the responses he got from the stand. I know you would want me to say...
Just trying to be helpful on technicalities...the writing is excellent. Warmly, Rebecca
Comment Written 21-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Rdfrdmom2
barbara:
Hope your school year is going well.
This is another excellent chapter. I had never heard of
the Minute Entry Ruling before. You provide excellent
information for people to pass on to victims with whom
they work.
Thanks for sharing another excellent chapter with us
love,
jan
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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barbara:
Hope your school year is going well.
This is another excellent chapter. I had never heard of
the Minute Entry Ruling before. You provide excellent
information for people to pass on to victims with whom
they work.
Thanks for sharing another excellent chapter with us
love,
jan
Comment Written 21-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Violet Demise
Great job Barbara. I enjoyed this chapter just like I enjoyed the previous ones that I actually read so far. I admire you simple way of writing, and I encourage you to keep up the great work. Very beautiful.
Best wishes,
Ivana
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2011
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Great job Barbara. I enjoyed this chapter just like I enjoyed the previous ones that I actually read so far. I admire you simple way of writing, and I encourage you to keep up the great work. Very beautiful.
Best wishes,
Ivana
Comment Written 21-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from livelylinda
barbara wilkey,
This is a good story, one that caught my attention immediately and kept it until I finished reading. I've been in divorce court so could put most of the story in some kind of perspective. In real life, I'm sure that the abusive husband would have been grilled much more harshly about his physical and mental abuse. For the sake of a short story I might have added comment that he was questioned intently for another hour and his answer was always that he was only disciplining; therefore saying much without actually saying many words for the sake of the short story.
I'm not crazy about the very ending. It was rather like falling off a cliff because we ran out of land. . .too abrupt for my liking. I have no brilliant idea how to improve it, but it needs a little something. Maybe a comment of relief from the abused woman, or a comment from her about now going to get her child.
Your choice of topic is honorable. I remember the days when abusive husbands were whispered about but no one interferred with a family. The man was in charge and could do whatever abuse he wanted to do. The woman was simply a slave if he saw fit. Thanks for writing this story.
livelylinda
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2011
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barbara wilkey,
This is a good story, one that caught my attention immediately and kept it until I finished reading. I've been in divorce court so could put most of the story in some kind of perspective. In real life, I'm sure that the abusive husband would have been grilled much more harshly about his physical and mental abuse. For the sake of a short story I might have added comment that he was questioned intently for another hour and his answer was always that he was only disciplining; therefore saying much without actually saying many words for the sake of the short story.
I'm not crazy about the very ending. It was rather like falling off a cliff because we ran out of land. . .too abrupt for my liking. I have no brilliant idea how to improve it, but it needs a little something. Maybe a comment of relief from the abused woman, or a comment from her about now going to get her child.
Your choice of topic is honorable. I remember the days when abusive husbands were whispered about but no one interferred with a family. The man was in charge and could do whatever abuse he wanted to do. The woman was simply a slave if he saw fit. Thanks for writing this story.
livelylinda
Comment Written 21-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review. This is part of a much longer chapter. It is the middle part. The ending of the chapter is still to come.
Comment from Rafaqat Bano
Hi
it is chapter 10 and part two.... but it can stand also itself ... a litle bit .it is a good work ... fluency is admirable ...it seems as court activity in ruitne ....sometimes a party blame other ... subject is strong and it ia appaeling .......your work is getting more machurity than befor ........I like it .....excellent..
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2011
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Hi
it is chapter 10 and part two.... but it can stand also itself ... a litle bit .it is a good work ... fluency is admirable ...it seems as court activity in ruitne ....sometimes a party blame other ... subject is strong and it ia appaeling .......your work is getting more machurity than befor ........I like it .....excellent..
Comment Written 21-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
