Lonely Hearts Meet
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Part 3 Chapter 5"Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.
94 total reviews
Comment from jehanned
Premise is solid, plot continues cleanly along logical course, form is good. The words are well placed and easy to understand, and the characters are developing nicely.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
  |
Premise is solid, plot continues cleanly along logical course, form is good. The words are well placed and easy to understand, and the characters are developing nicely.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from stanishmichelle
It's so obvious Troy loves Anna, and can take the teasing. Aunt Margaret drew a good sketch of Anna. I hope she is found soon. The suspense continues to build up, as I wonder about Anna. Great writing.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
It's so obvious Troy loves Anna, and can take the teasing. Aunt Margaret drew a good sketch of Anna. I hope she is found soon. The suspense continues to build up, as I wonder about Anna. Great writing.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
This was quite a relaxing
read, this chapter, the
conversation flowing so
naturally.... most enjoyable,
Barbara
After dinner(,) Margaret removed her sketchpad and charcoal pencils from a large(,) flowered bag
with a part(ing)- or is this the American way?
Margaret
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
This was quite a relaxing
read, this chapter, the
conversation flowing so
naturally.... most enjoyable,
Barbara
After dinner(,) Margaret removed her sketchpad and charcoal pencils from a large(,) flowered bag
with a part(ing)- or is this the American way?
Margaret
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
part is American, but I will take care of those other commas. I really hate commas. I appreciate your eagle eye.
Comment from 7thpoet
So, I guess that with Anna in hiding and everyone at this household ready to do their part, The pictures will be distributed and the search continues. Keep it coming.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
So, I guess that with Anna in hiding and everyone at this household ready to do their part, The pictures will be distributed and the search continues. Keep it coming.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from lola29
It is very encouraging to know that Troy and his family are highly invested in finding Anna and her son. Not too many people would extend such efforts.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
It is very encouraging to know that Troy and his family are highly invested in finding Anna and her son. Not too many people would extend such efforts.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
That's true, but remember domestic violence has personally effected Troy. His step-father killed his mother. I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from Shirley McLain
Great job and as always I enjoyed reading your writing. I can see the romance starting with Anne if Troy finds her and I'm sure he will.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
Great job and as always I enjoyed reading your writing. I can see the romance starting with Anne if Troy finds her and I'm sure he will.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
I can't wait to get the romance started, epecially since I'm a romance writer. I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from bhogg
Barbara - you're dialog and narrative read so smoothly. You've always managed to "hook" me into your stories. You also know how to end each piece with anticipation till the next. Nicely written and edited. Bill
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
Barbara - you're dialog and narrative read so smoothly. You've always managed to "hook" me into your stories. You also know how to end each piece with anticipation till the next. Nicely written and edited. Bill
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review and support. I appreciate both.
Comment from adewpearl
Great use of dialogue - I love how the men quibble over little differences in the way Anna looks. I also love the way Paul and Margaret notice the love in Troy's descriptions. :-) He wears his heart on his sleeve, for sure. Brooke
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
Great use of dialogue - I love how the men quibble over little differences in the way Anna looks. I also love the way Paul and Margaret notice the love in Troy's descriptions. :-) He wears his heart on his sleeve, for sure. Brooke
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Debasish Datta
Good, smooth flow. Holds the reader's attention all through. Further, as a snippet out of a story, is more than able, within a very limited cut, to give some idea of the overall direction and context of the whole work too. In that sense, representative selection.
Good command over style - light, attractive.
Thanks
Debasish
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
Good, smooth flow. Holds the reader's attention all through. Further, as a snippet out of a story, is more than able, within a very limited cut, to give some idea of the overall direction and context of the whole work too. In that sense, representative selection.
Good command over style - light, attractive.
Thanks
Debasish
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from Des Beirne
Love the way you built the picture, it's so unusual to be reading a book and visualising a main character.
A tiny typo in this line "How would you describe it?(("?)) Margaret glanced toward Paul.
Still enjoying the read, still looking forward to more.
Des
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
|
Love the way you built the picture, it's so unusual to be reading a book and visualising a main character.
A tiny typo in this line "How would you describe it?(("?)) Margaret glanced toward Paul.
Still enjoying the read, still looking forward to more.
Des
Comment Written 16-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2011
-
I will correct that. Thank your for your kind review.
