Paranormal Adventures
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "First Blood"Case Studies of Hauntings
66 total reviews
Comment from Cheryl Daphine
I love that picture,fits the story well. Seems like they are getting closer to the 'root' of this problem. Hope Mia is o.k. I look forward to the next chapter,and seeing this story through to a 'house cleansing'.
reply by the author on 27-May-2011
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I love that picture,fits the story well. Seems like they are getting closer to the 'root' of this problem. Hope Mia is o.k. I look forward to the next chapter,and seeing this story through to a 'house cleansing'.
Comment Written 27-May-2011
reply by the author on 27-May-2011
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Hi, Daph's Delight. Thanks for reading the chapter. I really appreciate your insight and interest. I plan to keep Mia around for the long haul. Once the team finishes the case, they'll be on to the next. Got some interesting stuff still planned for this case. Hope you have a wonderful long weekend, DD. Thanks again! Bev
Comment from Piggies Grandma
This was well written and very well thought out. I enjoyed reading it, but I think I'll have to go back and find out what happened before.
reply by the author on 25-May-2011
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This was well written and very well thought out. I enjoyed reading it, but I think I'll have to go back and find out what happened before.
Comment Written 25-May-2011
reply by the author on 25-May-2011
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Hi, Piggies Grandma. I really appreciate your reading this chapter. Quite a lot has happened, so it would probably would be helpful. Anyway, I sure appreciate your checking out this chapter. Cheers! Bev
Comment from KathyH
This is an engaging story that held my attention. It is well written and flows easily. Your author notes were helpful as a newcomer to the story. But even withoutbthe background it would have stood on it's own. Nice job
reply by the author on 23-May-2011
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This is an engaging story that held my attention. It is well written and flows easily. Your author notes were helpful as a newcomer to the story. But even withoutbthe background it would have stood on it's own. Nice job
Comment Written 23-May-2011
reply by the author on 23-May-2011
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Thanks, Kathy H. I really appreciate your taking time to read the chapter and your very generous review. I have a new chapter about ready to come out soon - hope you'll stop by again. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from 7thpoet
I wish I could have started this delightful story when it began, so as not to sound so lost. Thank you for the authors note as they helped tremendously. Always up for a good ghost/murder/horror story, like this one.
reply by the author on 20-May-2011
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I wish I could have started this delightful story when it began, so as not to sound so lost. Thank you for the authors note as they helped tremendously. Always up for a good ghost/murder/horror story, like this one.
Comment Written 19-May-2011
reply by the author on 20-May-2011
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Hi, 7thpoet. I like a good ghost story, too; and
Comment from Pen&Ink
This is very good, Bev. You've done a nice job on building the suspense, and introducing into the plot a bit of conflict within the team. Good use of conversation to carry the load. Ray
reply by the author on 18-May-2011
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This is very good, Bev. You've done a nice job on building the suspense, and introducing into the plot a bit of conflict within the team. Good use of conversation to carry the load. Ray
Comment Written 18-May-2011
reply by the author on 18-May-2011
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Thank you so much Ray. I really appreciate your insight and generous review! Warm regards, Bev
Comment from vickib
Hey Bev, I enjoyed this so much and following right along with it. Cracked me up the Tipsy Butler, that's such a good name. You really have a nack for this and I love your little sayings, stick to you like a post it note. I'm waiting for the mean Charles to show up. Great writing. XO
reply by the author on 18-May-2011
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Hey Bev, I enjoyed this so much and following right along with it. Cracked me up the Tipsy Butler, that's such a good name. You really have a nack for this and I love your little sayings, stick to you like a post it note. I'm waiting for the mean Charles to show up. Great writing. XO
Comment Written 18-May-2011
reply by the author on 18-May-2011
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Thanks, buddy. I'm really happy you enjoyed the chapter. You are also a mind reader, because Charles is going to be up to further no good in the next installment. You are such a warm and generous friend! Hugs, Bev
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Okay I'll be looking forward to that. :)
Comment from Mary Ann MCPhedran
A good write with this story line and it is entertaining
You are on to a good exciting story here and if you stick at it you may be a best seller. MARY
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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A good write with this story line and it is entertaining
You are on to a good exciting story here and if you stick at it you may be a best seller. MARY
Comment Written 17-May-2011
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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Hi, Mary. Thank you so much for your wonderful review! You've brightened my day considerably. Much appreciate your generosity. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from WilliamDeen
Good writing. A very intense addition with good action. Dialogue and descriptions really added to the intensity. A very enjoyable read.
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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Good writing. A very intense addition with good action. Dialogue and descriptions really added to the intensity. A very enjoyable read.
Comment Written 17-May-2011
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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Thanks, WD. I really appreciate your support for my chapter and your generous review. Cheers! Bev
Comment from R. K. Alan
The action seems to have picked up, Mia injured and the team getting ready to go back there during the night. There is one feisty spirit present for sure. Ray aka R. K. Alan
suggestion...
It's obvious that we've already stirred up at least one spirit
Obviously, we've stirred up at least one ghost - you may want to change up one of these lines, they are only three or four paragraphs apart.
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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The action seems to have picked up, Mia injured and the team getting ready to go back there during the night. There is one feisty spirit present for sure. Ray aka R. K. Alan
suggestion...
It's obvious that we've already stirred up at least one spirit
Obviously, we've stirred up at least one ghost - you may want to change up one of these lines, they are only three or four paragraphs apart.
Comment Written 16-May-2011
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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Hi, Ray. Thanks for reading my chapter and offering your suggestion - a good one! I appreciate it. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from James Sarzotti
"But, I'm sticking to you like a post-it note for the rest of the night, Mia." Love this comment.
This is one of the first third-person pieces I've read on this site and it's written very smoothly. The pacing is good as well and there's never any question about what's going on. The characters seem real and are very sympathetic. And while this type of story is not my cup of tea, it was enjoyable to read.
Good luck!
reply by the author on 16-May-2011
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"But, I'm sticking to you like a post-it note for the rest of the night, Mia." Love this comment.
This is one of the first third-person pieces I've read on this site and it's written very smoothly. The pacing is good as well and there's never any question about what's going on. The characters seem real and are very sympathetic. And while this type of story is not my cup of tea, it was enjoyable to read.
Good luck!
Comment Written 16-May-2011
reply by the author on 16-May-2011
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Hi, James. I am especially appreciative of you taking time to read this chapter since it is, as you say, not 'your cup of tea'. Very generous of you to take the time and offer your insights. Thanks a bunch, Bev
