Reviews from

Lonely Hearts Meet

Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Part two chapter three"
Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.

90 total reviews 
Comment from bhogg
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Barbara - so well written, but sometimes hard to read. As I read your posts, I keep saying that this is only fiction, but I know better. What you are writing about happens every day. I hope you are doing better, and Happy Easter right back at you. Always warm regards, Bill

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your kind review and support.
Comment from Carolyn 12
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your writing style flows so easily that I was done as fast as I begun. That is wonderful for me in reading. I thank you for your style, your story and I hope the ending is a good one.

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    Thank you for the kind review and the encouragement.
Comment from Belinda
Excellent
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Hi, Barbara, I'm glad things are going to be better (I hope). This chapter holds my interest and I'll be waiting for the next. Happy Easter to you too.

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your kind review. I am doing a little better. I have been considering doing a cancer update.
Comment from Dave M
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Barbara,

This is an exceptional chapter. You bring out Anna's desperation and hopeless feeling well. And yes, Troy is getting involved, even though it would be smarter of him not to do this.

I thoroughly enjoyed this read and have one comment:

"He stood, started too leaned [to lean] over her, but changed his mind."

Dave

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    I orginally had leaned to, but my computer threw a fit, so I listened to it. I should not have. Thank you for your kind review and support.
Comment from Dale95
Excellent
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Wow, and this story keeps getting better and better. Good job with this. And what a debilitating paralyzer fear can be. I have felt this kind of immobilizing effect a long, long time ago but, I can still feel its chill deep in my bones. Hopelessness comes from not having an option for defense and that is overwhelming, yet it has such an easy fix.

The Art of Self-Defense is just knowing, for certain that you have an option, and that in itself makes all the difference in the world. It should be required learning for all kids through grade school, and there would be no more little Bully Bobby's running around on the playground. Bobby, might have turned out to be a nice guy, had he learned some basic respect lessons when he was young.
Sorry for my rambling ranting again. Keep up the good writing. -Dale

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    You are not rambling. Your insight gives me encouragement and support. Thank you.
Comment from pickthorn
Excellent
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An interesting story revolving around spousal and child abuse, which happens too often in our society. Hopefully the perpetrator will receive his just due in future chapters. A couple of spags in this sentence...."Of course. He stood, started too leaned over her, but changed his mind." started to lean over her, I think is what you are saying. Very good story. pickthorn

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    I have corrected that typo. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from axelbeariter
Excellent
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As Troy stood beside Michael's crib,a nurse came up to him and asked, "Are you a family member?"/Move the a before nurse over a space----"Yes." She pulled Michael to her and kissed his chubby cheeks. After she held him to her chest, she released a deep breath and stared at Troy. "I can't put him through this again. What should I do?"/The only thing missing frome this scene is some reaction from the baby. Does he cry, coo or lie limp--show Michael doing something in relation to him seeing his mother----"You have a few options. You can live with a friend, family, or women's shelters until you're financially capable of supporting yourself./Use: or a woman's shelter/or womens' shelters----Again, you've written a terrific piece on how a battered woman deals with her situation--Bravo!



 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your eagle eye. I have made the corrections.
reply by axelbeariter on 24-Apr-2011
    Thanks, but don't use that cliche in your writing. Due to a rowdy possum, I only see out of one eye, so you could address me as having a possumed eye.
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    LOL
Comment from Gert sherwood
Excellent
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Hi Barb,
For some reason I'm not able to give you a 6 rating that you deserve for this chapte.

I like your story, it's so emotional and let me tell you I really like Troy
Excuse me if I don't get to your next chapters
( Tomorrow is the time to get my surgery to replace my messed up hip
Love
Gert

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    I will be praying for you tomorrow. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
Excellent
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this is very well written, barbara, a warm and poignant chapter for your book, getting to hold michael was probably the best healing medicine she could have. i hope you had a good easter too

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your kind review. I appreciate your support.
Comment from quashdog
Excellent
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Thankfully, Troy shows that not all guys are abusive monsters like Anna's husband. It is a very sad situation that she finds herself in. These guys are like Jeckyll and Hyde. When in courtship they can be sweet as molassas but once a girl commits to them, they turn into slave owners.

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2011
    Yes, in the next few posts Anna will explain when Bobby changed and how she got trapped. Thank you for your kind review.