Midnight Murderers
To those who have stolen my life.31 total reviews
Comment from Narvik
Well, this would make a great bedtime poem for kids. :-O
Whoa, Suse, you realy took this one to the dephths of poignancy. Even the sound of the words, above and beyond the meaning, really enhanced this. Sent chills up my spine and through my brain. Words like 'cretin' and 'curs' made it even more chilling. Super poem, Suse. Really is.
Well, this would make a great bedtime poem for kids. :-O
Whoa, Suse, you realy took this one to the dephths of poignancy. Even the sound of the words, above and beyond the meaning, really enhanced this. Sent chills up my spine and through my brain. Words like 'cretin' and 'curs' made it even more chilling. Super poem, Suse. Really is.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from chita
You have a good flow with your poem and rhyme well-you are descriptive and write with emotion-you write about evil, mayhem and madness and horrid hateful hurt that is stirred by creatures--I like where you write (When hearts of midnight murderers-Beat faster to the drum)--a thought provoking write--great job.
You have a good flow with your poem and rhyme well-you are descriptive and write with emotion-you write about evil, mayhem and madness and horrid hateful hurt that is stirred by creatures--I like where you write (When hearts of midnight murderers-Beat faster to the drum)--a thought provoking write--great job.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from adewpearl
excellent use of alliteration with midnight murderers/madness/mayhem
Your quatrains have good abab rhyme
evil's darkened slum - add the apostrophe for possessive
horrid, hateful hurt - more excellent alliteration
These cretin's - drop the apostrophe in this plural word
I like your use of repetition in underscoring this dark message. Brooke
excellent use of alliteration with midnight murderers/madness/mayhem
Your quatrains have good abab rhyme
evil's darkened slum - add the apostrophe for possessive
horrid, hateful hurt - more excellent alliteration
These cretin's - drop the apostrophe in this plural word
I like your use of repetition in underscoring this dark message. Brooke
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from Fireshadow
.
WOW ! Susan, this sure is a dark poem seething with anger and despair. It would make a great entry for Gungalo's Dark Poetry Club. The artwork is also quite gory and supports well your poem.
Just remember this, my dear friend : NO ONE can steal your life nor your peace if don't surrender either.
Love ya'
Ama
P.S.
Welcome - nice to have you back !
.
WOW ! Susan, this sure is a dark poem seething with anger and despair. It would make a great entry for Gungalo's Dark Poetry Club. The artwork is also quite gory and supports well your poem.
Just remember this, my dear friend : NO ONE can steal your life nor your peace if don't surrender either.
Love ya'
Ama
P.S.
Welcome - nice to have you back !
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from Cheryl Daphine
Very good 'dark' poem. The structure,flow and rhyme are all good. The picture,while any thing but beautiful,expressed well the content, of your piece.Well written piece.
Very good 'dark' poem. The structure,flow and rhyme are all good. The picture,while any thing but beautiful,expressed well the content, of your piece.Well written piece.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from markk
well written and what a strong picture as well! you've put across a very strong emotion and I hope that this is not really your feeling. However, its an excellent and moving poem. well done.
well written and what a strong picture as well! you've put across a very strong emotion and I hope that this is not really your feeling. However, its an excellent and moving poem. well done.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from NightHunter'
This...is...AWESOME! I love it! the rhythm flows and doesn't stop, and the rhyming is great! I love the bit where it goes 'black hearts of midnight murderers, beat slowly to the drum...' Great opening line!
I WANT MORE! :P
Max.
This...is...AWESOME! I love it! the rhythm flows and doesn't stop, and the rhyming is great! I love the bit where it goes 'black hearts of midnight murderers, beat slowly to the drum...' Great opening line!
I WANT MORE! :P
Max.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
Susan,
Suse, it is so good to hear from you. I hope things are going better for you. I get the poem-your ex-neighbors and it is really good. Take care and would love to hear from you soon! Hugs, Debbid
Susan,
Suse, it is so good to hear from you. I hope things are going better for you. I get the poem-your ex-neighbors and it is really good. Take care and would love to hear from you soon! Hugs, Debbid
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from misscookie
Oh boy,
is the packing and moving getting to you
This one is not one I like but there is a message in it for all evil doers ( smile)
This is a awful good write my friend.
Oh boy,
is the packing and moving getting to you
This one is not one I like but there is a message in it for all evil doers ( smile)
This is a awful good write my friend.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011
Comment from Chris Tee
An amazing poem!!
The conclusion is very good."Of evils darkened slum ... "
It is superb to say the least
Thank you for sharing this
Well done!!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
An amazing poem!!
The conclusion is very good."Of evils darkened slum ... "
It is superb to say the least
Thank you for sharing this
Well done!!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2011