God Granted Him His Wish
His Last Walk88 total reviews
Comment from Peter@Poole
Tjhe story is poignant and the imagery strong. Poetically, the rhyming is good but you appear to have concentrated on that, as if rhyme is the only important element. The metre leaves something to be desired because stress patterns vary and syllabification too. I'm willing to enlarge if you wish. Peter
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
   |
Tjhe story is poignant and the imagery strong. Poetically, the rhyming is good but you appear to have concentrated on that, as if rhyme is the only important element. The metre leaves something to be desired because stress patterns vary and syllabification too. I'm willing to enlarge if you wish. Peter
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thank you Peter for your honest opinion. However, so far, this poem has received 78 reviews. 69 were excellent and 9 were exceptional ratings. Thanks again. Bill
Comment from louparis
Excellent piece.
No errors worth noting in this.
How many men of the land have passed without notice.
No man, if he can avoid it, wants to be the slave of a wheelchair, or an acrid nursing home.
Lou
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
|
Excellent piece.
No errors worth noting in this.
How many men of the land have passed without notice.
No man, if he can avoid it, wants to be the slave of a wheelchair, or an acrid nursing home.
Lou
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thank you Lou for your great review. I appreciate your thoughts very much. Bill
Comment from JW
Wow. What a beautiful story, within a poem. It is a shame it could not have become a reality for your father.
In getting back to the review, not much needs to be sad. Your creation of it was perfect. Good job.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
 |
Wow. What a beautiful story, within a poem. It is a shame it could not have become a reality for your father.
In getting back to the review, not much needs to be sad. Your creation of it was perfect. Good job.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thank you Jonathon for all those stars. I really appreciate such a great rating and I'm glad that you enjoyed it. Have a great day my friend. Bill
Comment from stephybs
This is such a sad yet beautiful story poem, the reader can not help but feel what you have expressed with your well written emotions. Beautiful! Stephy
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
|
This is such a sad yet beautiful story poem, the reader can not help but feel what you have expressed with your well written emotions. Beautiful! Stephy
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thank you Stephy for such a wonderful review, I appreciate it very much. Have a nice day. Bill
Comment from miajaffri
Great picture to go with with heartfelt poem. You tell
a beautiful story in a poem, which seems to be the hope
for all older folks. To die in their home. I like...he
wanted to feel the sod beneath his feet. It's a comforting
feeling to know the land belongs to you. The land you
have worked on and lived on for your whole life. Very nice!
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
|
Great picture to go with with heartfelt poem. You tell
a beautiful story in a poem, which seems to be the hope
for all older folks. To die in their home. I like...he
wanted to feel the sod beneath his feet. It's a comforting
feeling to know the land belongs to you. The land you
have worked on and lived on for your whole life. Very nice!
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thank you my friend for this wonderful rating and review. I really do appreciate it. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Have a great day and God bless you. Bill
Comment from animatqua
This is an intense, but beautiful, story. Many parts of it touched me deeply, especially the desire to feel the earth beneath one's feet, and the memory of fall.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
|
This is an intense, but beautiful, story. Many parts of it touched me deeply, especially the desire to feel the earth beneath one's feet, and the memory of fall.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thank you my friend for your wonderful review. I'm glad that you enjoyed it. Have a nice day. Bill
Comment from carmen vargas
It's a nostalgic poem. History account of a farmer who did not die in hospital. Home left for the field and asked God to take care of the family forever. Then murił.Versos fluids. Sensory images beautiful. Congratulations
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
|
It's a nostalgic poem. History account of a farmer who did not die in hospital. Home left for the field and asked God to take care of the family forever. Then murił.Versos fluids. Sensory images beautiful. Congratulations
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thank you my friend for your great review. Im glad that you enjoyed it. Have a great day. Bill
Comment from bobwhite
I can relate to wanting to die at home near the land and the things we have known. Nursing homes seem to steal a person's identity and their light. I live in the country surrounded by nature, woods,pastures and animals and would be so uncomfortable living in a subdivision. Your poem is poignant with great imagery and heart.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
|
I can relate to wanting to die at home near the land and the things we have known. Nursing homes seem to steal a person's identity and their light. I live in the country surrounded by nature, woods,pastures and animals and would be so uncomfortable living in a subdivision. Your poem is poignant with great imagery and heart.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thanks my friend for your review. There's nothing like living in the country. I wouldn't last long in a city. Have a great day. Bill
Comment from MS Writer
Good luck in the contest Bill. What a beautifully crafted tribute to your father. I like the 2nd and 4th line rhyme scheme. The words were heartwarming and soft. This is certainly a winning poem.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
|
Good luck in the contest Bill. What a beautifully crafted tribute to your father. I like the 2nd and 4th line rhyme scheme. The words were heartwarming and soft. This is certainly a winning poem.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thanks my friend for your kind words and thoughts. I do appreciate you reading it and that you enjoyed it. Have a wonderful day. Bill
Comment from Cletus Hardiman
This is great! I can relate to how you and your dad feel. I enjoyed reading this even though it was a sad write! But, there are forms of sadness that can make us feel better...and we just say "ahh! Thanks! Cletus Hardiman
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
|
This is great! I can relate to how you and your dad feel. I enjoyed reading this even though it was a sad write! But, there are forms of sadness that can make us feel better...and we just say "ahh! Thanks! Cletus Hardiman
Comment Written 14-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2011
-
Thank you Clete for your review. I agree with you, sadness is just a part of life. You feel sad when you think of someone that's passed on, but like you said, it's a good feeling knowing thier still in your heart. Take care my friend. Bill
