Another Pretty Face
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "Sara and Dani talk."Can love survive small town gossip?
84 total reviews
Comment from boberto
Hi there"
Part of the "A" Team coming on board. I'll say it is because I'm Italian and I need lots of light to see.
I like the first chapter--I like the second chapter too.
But, don't interconnect well. They are suppose to be occurring within the same time span, correct? Yet, they don't transition that way--read like two distinct time periods.
To me anyway.
boberto
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
  |
Hi there"
Part of the "A" Team coming on board. I'll say it is because I'm Italian and I need lots of light to see.
I like the first chapter--I like the second chapter too.
But, don't interconnect well. They are suppose to be occurring within the same time span, correct? Yet, they don't transition that way--read like two distinct time periods.
To me anyway.
boberto
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
Nope they aren't happening at the same time. Joe leaves, then George comes in the house, he takes Cassie and leaves, then Dani shows up. Sorry for the confusion.
-
Yeah. But, aren't they within minutes-if even an hour, I think you need at least a words for a smoother transition. Even a statement of time, such as "Shortly after Joe leaves-----"
-
After Joe leaves George enters the the house.
-
I'll buy that.
Comment from Realist101
Hi Barb! This is another wonderful chapter...just great dialogue. I always read your work with great admiration and awe, and I hope I have learned a little of how to do this from reading such excellence. Very good my friend. ") Luv, Susan
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
Hi Barb! This is another wonderful chapter...just great dialogue. I always read your work with great admiration and awe, and I hope I have learned a little of how to do this from reading such excellence. Very good my friend. ") Luv, Susan
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
Thank you for your encouraging words. I appreciate them.
Comment from Helen Tan
A clean chapter - at least in my eyes. Joe is one lucky guy to have all these "guardian angels" looking out for his interest.
Dani will probably need some time to think over the situation but I'm sure she'll come around. They're made for each other. It's not easy to enter a relationship where there are potential step- children involved and Joe is a brave man to take on the responsibility. I'm sure Sara will see that in him.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
A clean chapter - at least in my eyes. Joe is one lucky guy to have all these "guardian angels" looking out for his interest.
Dani will probably need some time to think over the situation but I'm sure she'll come around. They're made for each other. It's not easy to enter a relationship where there are potential step- children involved and Joe is a brave man to take on the responsibility. I'm sure Sara will see that in him.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
I sure hope Sara sees how great Joe is. I appreciate your kind review.
-
Oops, my apologies. I should have stated Sara needs time to think, not Dani. I did read the chapter! Hugs from Singapore.
Comment from essence56
You know I love this story and this author. I am learning alot from you Barb and I wish you well in health and life. Yes, Sara is being forced to look at herself. I do hope she makes the right choice. I believe Joe loves her and daughter. So I look forward to Sara going after her man. Very good.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
You know I love this story and this author. I am learning alot from you Barb and I wish you well in health and life. Yes, Sara is being forced to look at herself. I do hope she makes the right choice. I believe Joe loves her and daughter. So I look forward to Sara going after her man. Very good.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review and encouraging words.
Comment from Mustang Patty
This continuing story is told well with the use of the dialogue. The characters feel natural, and there isn't the use of artificial means to move the situations along. Well done - I look forward to the rest. ~patty~
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
This continuing story is told well with the use of the dialogue. The characters feel natural, and there isn't the use of artificial means to move the situations along. Well done - I look forward to the rest. ~patty~
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Connie P
Thank goodness for George and Dani, they are the kind of friends everyone needs. You know I'm rooting for Sara and Joe, and especially if Sara can get past her fears.
Great chapter!
Connie
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
Thank goodness for George and Dani, they are the kind of friends everyone needs. You know I'm rooting for Sara and Joe, and especially if Sara can get past her fears.
Great chapter!
Connie
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
I think Sara will get past her fears, or at least I hope so. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from dportwood
barbara,
Excellent use of dialogue to show emotions and feelings of the charcters which all engages the reader and keeps his interest sharp. Well done. Duane
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
barbara,
Excellent use of dialogue to show emotions and feelings of the charcters which all engages the reader and keeps his interest sharp. Well done. Duane
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Allezw2
Lady Barbara Wilkie,
At least the two women have Dani's experience as a military spouse so the advice is not words out of whole cloth.
In the short itme I was on active duty, it never ceased to amaze me at the persistence in the face of the difficult times faced by the military dependents. They may be a part of the larger family. However, the division and clearly defined, and differing privileges between enlisted and officer ranks are enough to make one wonder about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness when one has entrusted life and limb to impersonal authorities far above the pay grade.
Fantasist
For your consideration:
brought these [incidences](incidents) up
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
Lady Barbara Wilkie,
At least the two women have Dani's experience as a military spouse so the advice is not words out of whole cloth.
In the short itme I was on active duty, it never ceased to amaze me at the persistence in the face of the difficult times faced by the military dependents. They may be a part of the larger family. However, the division and clearly defined, and differing privileges between enlisted and officer ranks are enough to make one wonder about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness when one has entrusted life and limb to impersonal authorities far above the pay grade.
Fantasist
For your consideration:
brought these [incidences](incidents) up
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
I will take care of that. Yes, you are correct. The military does have it's own cast system. Thank you for your kind review.
-
You're quite welcome.
Comment from lola29
Oh, I see now that Sara is making all kinds of excuses because she's afraid. I'd forgotten she's never been married before, and placing her hopes in Joe could possibly bring her more pain. Very good!
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
Oh, I see now that Sara is making all kinds of excuses because she's afraid. I'd forgotten she's never been married before, and placing her hopes in Joe could possibly bring her more pain. Very good!
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review. Yes, Sara's fears are very real. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from quashdog
Crisp clean write, I spotted a couple of typos but they were minor stuff. I cannot place myself in Sarah's place and will not pretend to "know how she feels" but after reading a couple of your chapters my heart aches for her.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
|
Crisp clean write, I spotted a couple of typos but they were minor stuff. I cannot place myself in Sarah's place and will not pretend to "know how she feels" but after reading a couple of your chapters my heart aches for her.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
-
Thank you for your kind review.
