The Pink Mitten
112 word micro flash30 total reviews
Comment from Glynnis W
Susan,
While you have an interseting idea, the writing is pretty disjointed. There's simply no sense of setting, character, or tension in this piece. Sorry to be so negative, but I just don't see a story here.
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reply by the author on 14-Dec-2010
Susan,
While you have an interseting idea, the writing is pretty disjointed. There's simply no sense of setting, character, or tension in this piece. Sorry to be so negative, but I just don't see a story here.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 14-Dec-2010
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Sorry to disappoint D.H! I wish you a safe and fun holiday! Susan
Comment from Jnetgame
Great job on this flash fiction piece. I would have liked to know a little more about who was in vehichle the tow truck was headed to, but I can make something up. Thanks for sharing this.
reply by the author on 14-Dec-2010
Great job on this flash fiction piece. I would have liked to know a little more about who was in vehichle the tow truck was headed to, but I can make something up. Thanks for sharing this.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 14-Dec-2010
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Hi Jenny, thank you very much for an encouraging review! I hope you are happy and keeping warm!! Merry Christmas!! Susan
Comment from AlvinTEthington
I think this is excellent flash fiction. I like the specificity in using the number of the freeway. There is also good use of specificity in the color of the mitten. You know how much I like unresolved endings--I think they assure that the story will stay with the reader.
reply by the author on 14-Dec-2010
I think this is excellent flash fiction. I like the specificity in using the number of the freeway. There is also good use of specificity in the color of the mitten. You know how much I like unresolved endings--I think they assure that the story will stay with the reader.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 14-Dec-2010
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Hi Alvin! Thank you very much. I appreciate knowing you enjoyed the ending as it is. He made it to the car, but was he in time? Thank you for this! AND Merry Christmas to you and yours Alvin!! Susan
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You're welcome. Thank you for your good wishes.
Comment from Belinda
This is an excellent flash fiction. The tow truck got there alright, but ... ? It's okay, Susan, I can make my own ending. (All will be safe.) Btw, the pink mitten creates a vivid picture in my mind.
reply by the author on 14-Dec-2010
This is an excellent flash fiction. The tow truck got there alright, but ... ? It's okay, Susan, I can make my own ending. (All will be safe.) Btw, the pink mitten creates a vivid picture in my mind.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 14-Dec-2010
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Hi Belinda!! Thank you so much!! I am happy you enjoyed the ending as it is. Merry Christmas too! Stay safe and warm!! Susan
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Hi, Susan, on my side of the globe, I'm always warm ... :)
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") I'm glad! I can barely type, I just got in from taking our dog around the field. Brrrr! ")
Comment from Sasha
Flash fiction is definitely something I am new at and have a lot to learn. I enjoyed this very much and as far as I can tell there were no unnecessary words. The image of a pink mitten on an antenna provided strong, perfect imagery for this. I like the unresolved ending, I chose to believe he made it just in time.
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
Flash fiction is definitely something I am new at and have a lot to learn. I enjoyed this very much and as far as I can tell there were no unnecessary words. The image of a pink mitten on an antenna provided strong, perfect imagery for this. I like the unresolved ending, I chose to believe he made it just in time.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
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Hi Sasha! Thank you for this kind review! It's wonderful to hear from you, and I hope you are doing okay after your ordeal. I watched the birds today, and we have a flag in front of the window now, so hoping they will not hit it. Please take care and chin up? I think of you often with luv!! HUG! Susan
Comment from Dave M
Susan,
This is an excellent example of flash fiction, and I don't mind if the situation was unresolved. I couldn't find anything here to criticize.
I've heard of the lake-effect snow in northwestern Indiana. Apparently, the snow drifts back over the roads as soon as the snowplow has gone by. Hope you're staying warm.
Dave
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
Susan,
This is an excellent example of flash fiction, and I don't mind if the situation was unresolved. I couldn't find anything here to criticize.
I've heard of the lake-effect snow in northwestern Indiana. Apparently, the snow drifts back over the roads as soon as the snowplow has gone by. Hope you're staying warm.
Dave
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
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Thank you Dave! You too, we are in southern Indiana now, and it's mostly just super cold. But just enough snow to make it slick. I want NEW ZEALAND or ??? anywhere warm...geez. I hope you are safe and warm too! ") Susan
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written with mystery and descriptive scheme. There is a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. Good job.
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
This is very well written with mystery and descriptive scheme. There is a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. Good job.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
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Hi Charlie! Thank you! I hope you are doing well...Stay safe and warm!! ") Susan
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You're welcome, Susan. Charlie
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I am hearing on the news that you are under a TON of snow. Well, I don't know exactly where you are, but that entire area is under snow. Please be careful.
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
I am hearing on the news that you are under a TON of snow. Well, I don't know exactly where you are, but that entire area is under snow. Please be careful.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
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Hi Barb! We are in southern Indiana, a burg called Shoals. UGH. We have about three inches of snow, but it blew around and made small drifts. And these snowtrucks MADE ICE! They do it all the time, melt it with salt, then it just refreezes and makes the ice worse. It's about 10 degrees. Amaryllis said she has 80 degrees!!!!!!!!! I want to go THERE! ") But some up this way did get a lot of snow, I just hate it. My atv would barely start and I have to use it to run our dog! ") I hope you are doing well and are at least halfway warm! ") Thank you for this kind review too!! I appreciate! Love !! Susan
Comment from Trybuck
Unfortunately, help arrived a few hours too late. The two bodies in the back seat were already as stiff as mannequins. We were pulling them out when another truck drove up. "No worries," they shouted as they got out. "The man and his wife are safe at the hospital. We came back to bring the mannequins in. They didn't want their prized possessions to freeze."
Well done with your flash fiction story, Buck
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
Unfortunately, help arrived a few hours too late. The two bodies in the back seat were already as stiff as mannequins. We were pulling them out when another truck drove up. "No worries," they shouted as they got out. "The man and his wife are safe at the hospital. We came back to bring the mannequins in. They didn't want their prized possessions to freeze."
Well done with your flash fiction story, Buck
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
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Hahahahahahaaaaa!!!! I love this ending! ") MOST hilarious and original! I can't claim it, but it would be great. Thank you for making my evening Buck! ") Smiles and a hug for yoU! Susan
Comment from Adama
Oh wow, 'The Pink Mitten' is a tense drama, which given our current weather here in the UK could become a reality. Gosh, a real cliff hanger. Did you make it on time, will you be able to make it back? Now I understand what is meant by flash-fiction. Great story.
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
Oh wow, 'The Pink Mitten' is a tense drama, which given our current weather here in the UK could become a reality. Gosh, a real cliff hanger. Did you make it on time, will you be able to make it back? Now I understand what is meant by flash-fiction. Great story.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2010
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Hi Adam! THank you! This is fiction,altho this does happen in Indiana a lot! Especially up north! ") I hope you are safe and warm! Thanks for this kind review too! Susan