Simba's Dilemma
Simba gets some bad news104 total reviews
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written with a smooth flow of words,making for a very easy read. It has been my experience the dog obeys the cat.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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This is very well written with a smooth flow of words,making for a very easy read. It has been my experience the dog obeys the cat.
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Thank you for reading and reviewing. It is my sincerest hope that this new puppy realizes that Simba IS the King! I do appreciate your kind words about my writing. Thank you so much. ~patty~
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YOu're welcome, Patty. Charlie
Comment from adewpearl
I remember your mentioning Simba yesterday when replying to my review of the story about getting your new puppy - it is quite clear that you love these creatures - you remind me of my daughter. This is a clever story from Simba's point of view, engaging and fun to read from beginning to end :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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I remember your mentioning Simba yesterday when replying to my review of the story about getting your new puppy - it is quite clear that you love these creatures - you remind me of my daughter. This is a clever story from Simba's point of view, engaging and fun to read from beginning to end :-) Brooke
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Thank you, Brooke! I appreciate your reviews and your kind words. Simba, Leo, and my new little guy - Will or Writer - will be regulars in my stories over the next few months or years. I'm glad you enjoyed it. ~patty~
Comment from Realist101
HA! He is going to be jealous! I think you did real well with this, and your helpers were great, I see no spags Patty. Your cat is gorgeous too, a real handsome fellow. I really enjoyed this cute tail! ") SMiles!! Susan
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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HA! He is going to be jealous! I think you did real well with this, and your helpers were great, I see no spags Patty. Your cat is gorgeous too, a real handsome fellow. I really enjoyed this cute tail! ") SMiles!! Susan
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Thank you so much for reading and the generous review. I'm glad you enjoyed Simba's story. It is my greatest hope that he and the puppy get along well; I purposely went the puppy route instead of adopting a JRT that came from a rescue shelter to give Simba a better chance to adapt. Thanks again for sharing your great story, and keep a watch out for more adventures with Simba and the new arrival. ~patty!
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I will do that! Happy writing Miss Patty! ") S.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
oh, this is so cute. i enjoyed reading this story about the reaction you think your cat may have to the new family member. i will have to go back to read simba's story
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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oh, this is so cute. i enjoyed reading this story about the reaction you think your cat may have to the new family member. i will have to go back to read simba's story
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Thank you so much for reading and the generous review. I'm glad you enjoyed Simba's story. It is my greatest hope that he and the puppy get along well; I purposely went the puppy route instead of adopting a JRT that came from a rescue shelter to give Simba a better chance to adapt. Thanks again, and keep a watch out for more adventures with Simba and the new arrival. ~patty!
Comment from koneart
I love Simba, and if I were a cat, that is exactly how I would talk and think. Very well done. Now for the ellipsis'. I would delete them as ellipsis are for continuing a thought not finished. Since what you wrote didn't seem as if it were a continued thought to follow, I would simply use a comma. Nice writing. Clear and understandable. Well done. You'll find a few issues in [ ]s below. Kone
Simba wasn't entirely sure why he and Leo had been sentenced to spend time here,. . . [I would delete ellipsis] but he was reasonably sure that it was only a matter of time until he and Leo went back to their own home. He knew because 'the man' continued to visit every so often, and talk to him in that low mumble that he used. Concern about where 'the mistress' was ran though his mind every so often . . . but he was pretty sure she would be back, too. He had been deserted before, and this was nothing like that time.
Earlier in his life, about four or five human years ago, Simba had been brought to a veterinarian's office and left to have something with his kidneys taken care of. He was in a lot of pain, and it hurt to walk, or eliminate himself, . . . and sometimes he did bad things, because he couldn't make it to the litter box. Days went by, and he didn't know where his humans were. He only knew the cold of the metal cage, and the occasional warm hands of the humans that [who] wore pajamas all the time.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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I love Simba, and if I were a cat, that is exactly how I would talk and think. Very well done. Now for the ellipsis'. I would delete them as ellipsis are for continuing a thought not finished. Since what you wrote didn't seem as if it were a continued thought to follow, I would simply use a comma. Nice writing. Clear and understandable. Well done. You'll find a few issues in [ ]s below. Kone
Simba wasn't entirely sure why he and Leo had been sentenced to spend time here,. . . [I would delete ellipsis] but he was reasonably sure that it was only a matter of time until he and Leo went back to their own home. He knew because 'the man' continued to visit every so often, and talk to him in that low mumble that he used. Concern about where 'the mistress' was ran though his mind every so often . . . but he was pretty sure she would be back, too. He had been deserted before, and this was nothing like that time.
Earlier in his life, about four or five human years ago, Simba had been brought to a veterinarian's office and left to have something with his kidneys taken care of. He was in a lot of pain, and it hurt to walk, or eliminate himself, . . . and sometimes he did bad things, because he couldn't make it to the litter box. Days went by, and he didn't know where his humans were. He only knew the cold of the metal cage, and the occasional warm hands of the humans that [who] wore pajamas all the time.
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Kone; thank you so much for your valuable input. I've incorporated your suggested changes into the story, and I agree that it reads much better. I appreciate your taking the time to read, edit, and review my story. The honesty, feedback, and assistance that I'm receiving here is extremely encouraging, and so welcome. Thank you very much. ~patty~
Comment from juliaSjames
I am a cat person, Patty, so I enjoyed Simba's story. Actually, he and the new puppy might get on well. At least that's what happened years ago when our sweet sausage dog, Brabdy, came to join our family at Christmas. Tigger, our black and white cat, became fast friends with him. And they could often be seen curled up asleep next to each other.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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I am a cat person, Patty, so I enjoyed Simba's story. Actually, he and the new puppy might get on well. At least that's what happened years ago when our sweet sausage dog, Brabdy, came to join our family at Christmas. Tigger, our black and white cat, became fast friends with him. And they could often be seen curled up asleep next to each other.
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Thank you so much for reading and the generous review. I'm glad you enjoyed Simba's story. It is my greatest hope that he and the puppy get along well; I purposely went the puppy route instead of adopting a JRT that came from a rescue shelter to give Simba a better chance to adapt. Thanks again for sharing your great story, and keep a watch out for more adventures with Simba and the new arrival. ~patty!
Comment from writer c
Who can't love smart, cute Simba? I loved the read, and from previous reviews it seems you have made some excellent edits! I love the kitty's name--Mufasa! We have two cats that we adore, and they play with the red dot too..staff in pajamas, time at the vets, all good. Cat lover soul-mate, you, and you do justice to a cat's musings. I'm glad I found this.
Carol
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Who can't love smart, cute Simba? I loved the read, and from previous reviews it seems you have made some excellent edits! I love the kitty's name--Mufasa! We have two cats that we adore, and they play with the red dot too..staff in pajamas, time at the vets, all good. Cat lover soul-mate, you, and you do justice to a cat's musings. I'm glad I found this.
Carol
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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I appreciate your reviews and your kind words. Simba, Leo, and my new little guy - Will or Writer - will be regulars in my stories over the next few months or years. I'm glad you enjoyed it. ~patty~
Comment from N.K. Wagner
Ah! So your new baby will have brothers! How very interesting. One hopes Simba and Leo will be tolerant of the infant. Enjoyed your POV. I look forward to hearing how everyone adapts; haven't done cross-species introductions. Your essay is well-written, of course, and without any room for improvement that I can see. Look forward to more news. N.K.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Ah! So your new baby will have brothers! How very interesting. One hopes Simba and Leo will be tolerant of the infant. Enjoyed your POV. I look forward to hearing how everyone adapts; haven't done cross-species introductions. Your essay is well-written, of course, and without any room for improvement that I can see. Look forward to more news. N.K.
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Thank you SO much for reading and your generous review and remarks. I will be sure to let folks know how things go, . . . not real sure when I get to write -- from what I hear, . .Jack Russell Terriers don't sleep!! I'm glad you enjoyed Simba's tale. ~patty~
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Sure they sleep--when you're busy doing something for someone else. Good luck, mama! N.K.
Comment from KayteeF
Simba sure sounds like the Boss Cat of the household, where ever he happens to be.
I smile at your description of him having his bath, you relate this very well.
I will have to read more of your pet tales, though I still hurt with the loss of my two boys, Tom and Jerry, twin cats we had from 9 weeks old, and they died aged 17 and 17 and a half, just within the past year.
I have not managed to write too much about them yet.
I do enjoy hearing your stories, thank you.
Cathleen
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Simba sure sounds like the Boss Cat of the household, where ever he happens to be.
I smile at your description of him having his bath, you relate this very well.
I will have to read more of your pet tales, though I still hurt with the loss of my two boys, Tom and Jerry, twin cats we had from 9 weeks old, and they died aged 17 and 17 and a half, just within the past year.
I have not managed to write too much about them yet.
I do enjoy hearing your stories, thank you.
Cathleen
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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Thank you, Cathleen. Your comments mean a lot. Given the passing of time, you will be able to write about your boys. I lost Rain - an incredible cat over 11 years ago, . . . and it took me years to write about him again, . . so I understand. Thank you for reading and the generous review - your opinion mean a lot to me! ~patty~
Comment from BethShelby
This is a good story written from the perspective of a cat which sounds like a very special cat. I often wonder what goes on in their minds but I think you've gotten into their heads rather well. I wondering why you did post this to the writing prompt from an animals perspective.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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This is a good story written from the perspective of a cat which sounds like a very special cat. I often wonder what goes on in their minds but I think you've gotten into their heads rather well. I wondering why you did post this to the writing prompt from an animals perspective.
Comment Written 02-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2010
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The animal perspective prompt is for a Thanksgiving story, . . and I'm working on that one, too. I just can't stop thinking about how Simba is going to react to the new puppy! Thank you for reading and the generous review.
