Another Pretty Face
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Chapter 7; part one"Can love survive small town gossip?
73 total reviews
Comment from Rafaqat Bano
Hi
it is good work ....story in this chapter is strong....... though sometimes ....it seems vague may be its link with the pevious chapters in it .....diaogue spoken by characters and their gestures is admirable and fantastic ...i love it ....words and its fluency is wondeful....i like it .... it is done very well ....keep it up.......
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Hi
it is good work ....story in this chapter is strong....... though sometimes ....it seems vague may be its link with the pevious chapters in it .....diaogue spoken by characters and their gestures is admirable and fantastic ...i love it ....words and its fluency is wondeful....i like it .... it is done very well ....keep it up.......
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you for your kind review. Yes, this is chapter 7 of a longer novel. I spent the first chapters making sure everything was well developed.
Comment from Lastamen
A wonderful continuation of this on going saga. The tension and situations mount with an even pace and the style of writing and prose makes for a comfortable and engaging read. Nicely crafted.
Till the last amen
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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A wonderful continuation of this on going saga. The tension and situations mount with an even pace and the style of writing and prose makes for a comfortable and engaging read. Nicely crafted.
Till the last amen
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from jadapenn
Hi Barbara, this was a nice chapter with Joe all over the place looking for Cassie. You have managed to write a long story which only spans over a few days. That takes some doing. Now Joe's job begins and Matt is already by his side. These guys stick together like glue.
Well done. luv jada
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Hi Barbara, this was a nice chapter with Joe all over the place looking for Cassie. You have managed to write a long story which only spans over a few days. That takes some doing. Now Joe's job begins and Matt is already by his side. These guys stick together like glue.
Well done. luv jada
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Joe and Matt are best friends!!!!! I appreciate your kind review. No more surgeries, at least for now.
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Hi girlfriend, such good news. Well I wrote you the little story about the chemo so just you hang in there and see it through. Nancy says you must wear bright nail polish. lol. luv you - jada
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I am already in anticipation.
Comment from Arkine
You got run over by an 18 Wheeler? Oie. I remembered that you were concerned about the possible cancer, but not getting run over. Good news about those test results, though.
Anyhow, I'm with Matt on this one, would the Cartel really know yet? Although, the accent is kind of suspicious. Good chapter! Only one thing I caught:
"She's falling apart. I'm going to need a few extra days. I can't leave ...(,)" - I think that should be a period?
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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You got run over by an 18 Wheeler? Oie. I remembered that you were concerned about the possible cancer, but not getting run over. Good news about those test results, though.
Anyhow, I'm with Matt on this one, would the Cartel really know yet? Although, the accent is kind of suspicious. Good chapter! Only one thing I caught:
"She's falling apart. I'm going to need a few extra days. I can't leave ...(,)" - I think that should be a period?
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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No, I didn't really get run over by an 18 wheeler, the recover from the surgery just felt like it. (LOL) I just received the results of my last surgery. NO more cancer!!! Now just chemo and raditation to make sure it doesn't come back.
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~L~ Ah, okay. Awesome about the results. I know chemo and radiation are rough, but you can get through it. :)
Comment from dmjones
Hi Barbara, this is excellent post. You've added a good element of suspense to this story. I hope they find Cassie soon but it doesn't look good.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Hi Barbara, this is excellent post. You've added a good element of suspense to this story. I hope they find Cassie soon but it doesn't look good.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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It will take a while to discover who has Cassie and then to get her back safely. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from eliz100
This is a great chapter. It was a good read from beginning to end. Interesting twist with Cassie missing, I never saw it coming.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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This is a great chapter. It was a good read from beginning to end. Interesting twist with Cassie missing, I never saw it coming.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from richard7
This really kept me interested.
I like your characters and the story so far.
having only read this chapter i can honestly say it is without fault and will try to read more as i go.
Bit of a mystery where Cassie is tho eh?!
Hey why cant 15 year olds write sweet poetry anyway!? :-)
thanks for a neat read.
have a good day.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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This really kept me interested.
I like your characters and the story so far.
having only read this chapter i can honestly say it is without fault and will try to read more as i go.
Bit of a mystery where Cassie is tho eh?!
Hey why cant 15 year olds write sweet poetry anyway!? :-)
thanks for a neat read.
have a good day.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Being a mother of all boys and 90% of their friends are male, I haven't known a single one of them who would step out of their comfort zone and write a girl a love poem. (LOL) Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Eddie Z
You have covered a lot of ground hear with dialogue. Although not descriptive it still seems to fit everything into a neat picture frame. I do like the casual approach to the conversations though sometimes they needed a little more tension. Maybe its just the way you have Joe coming across as such a cool, proficient operator. Just thought this sentence might work differently with "Sara is too new". "Your relationship with Sara's too new for the cartel to know about it." Just a thought. Hope all goes well with the Cancer reports. I have a brother-in-law who has been diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. It is really very difficult for me to imagine. God Bless
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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You have covered a lot of ground hear with dialogue. Although not descriptive it still seems to fit everything into a neat picture frame. I do like the casual approach to the conversations though sometimes they needed a little more tension. Maybe its just the way you have Joe coming across as such a cool, proficient operator. Just thought this sentence might work differently with "Sara is too new". "Your relationship with Sara's too new for the cartel to know about it." Just a thought. Hope all goes well with the Cancer reports. I have a brother-in-law who has been diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. It is really very difficult for me to imagine. God Bless
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you for your kind review and well wishes. Joe is highly trained and is used to similar situations.
Comment from RebelRose
This is getting really interesting, though very scary. There are two ways this could go and neither one is good. The cartel or the internet predator. Very well written, good dislogue and ability to capture and hold the reader's interest.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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This is getting really interesting, though very scary. There are two ways this could go and neither one is good. The cartel or the internet predator. Very well written, good dislogue and ability to capture and hold the reader's interest.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from bhogg
As usual, a fabulous post. I admire the way that you pace your stories. This one obviously created some tension which you know how to pull off so well. Warm regards, Bill
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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As usual, a fabulous post. I admire the way that you pace your stories. This one obviously created some tension which you know how to pull off so well. Warm regards, Bill
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
