Triolets: Traditional and Modified
Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "A Sea of Sunshine"Poems employing this musical, repeating form
119 total reviews
Comment from Gungalo
Beautifully written verse!!! The triolet is one of my all time favorites to write and you have done this one perfectly. I love the words you chose and the inferences in the write. Just lovely. Just so very lovly.
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2010
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Beautifully written verse!!! The triolet is one of my all time favorites to write and you have done this one perfectly. I love the words you chose and the inferences in the write. Just lovely. Just so very lovly.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2010
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Thank you, Gungalo, for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
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'T was a gorgeous write!!!
Comment from Realist101
This needs a six! We saw fields like this out in South Dakota! I wanted to go out and walk around in them! Your poem really speaks of summer, I sure do love it!! Beautiful Brooke!!! ") Susan
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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This needs a six! We saw fields like this out in South Dakota! I wanted to go out and walk around in them! Your poem really speaks of summer, I sure do love it!! Beautiful Brooke!!! ") Susan
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thanks so much, Susan - I saw a sunflower farm in North Dakota - they sure are impressive :_) Brooke
Comment from rhymelord
Dear Brooke,
Inspired as ever with vivid imagery that even outshines the excellent choice of illustration. The nature lover has returned.LOL
Regards
Reg
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Dear Brooke,
Inspired as ever with vivid imagery that even outshines the excellent choice of illustration. The nature lover has returned.LOL
Regards
Reg
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you, Reg, my lovely friend :-) Brooke
Comment from mtngalofnc
Hi Brooke,
What a beautiful triolet. It reminds me of our Creator enabling us with the knowledge and the vision to share His beauty, "where flowers grow in golden waves." Good job and thank you for sharing.
Becky
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Hi Brooke,
What a beautiful triolet. It reminds me of our Creator enabling us with the knowledge and the vision to share His beauty, "where flowers grow in golden waves." Good job and thank you for sharing.
Becky
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thanks so much, Becky :-) I appreciate your kind review :-) Brooke
Comment from Nicnac
I love this triolet.
You have a wonderful gift of making repetitive lines flow smoothly.
This is gorgeous.
where soil once seemed fit but for graves <--I love this line.
You are so full of creativity and originality, Brooke.
Your words display a beautiful sea of beauty that has splashed me with a smile. :)
Nic
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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I love this triolet.
You have a wonderful gift of making repetitive lines flow smoothly.
This is gorgeous.
where soil once seemed fit but for graves <--I love this line.
You are so full of creativity and originality, Brooke.
Your words display a beautiful sea of beauty that has splashed me with a smile. :)
Nic
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Nic, thank you so much for your gracious words. :_) I love repetitive line poetry. Brooke :-)
Comment from flygirl254
Hi Brooke!
Whew! Life gets crazy sometimes, but I love that I come here and find this lovely poem from you. Your triolet is beautiful. I love the lines you chose for repetition. I also think one of the complementing lines, "and life's full luster is revealed," is really filled with meaning involving how we perceive our lives and the beauty we can allow to grow there; unfortunately it might be under the surface and is never revealed after all.
The one little hitch I had with the poem, no matter how I read it, was the line, "Where soil once seemed fit but for graves." In Illinois the word "soil" is two syllables; here in Ohio it's one syllable. Either way I use it, though, the line doesn't balance out for me when it comes to the meter and syllables. With the one syllable pronunciation, it feels odd to emphasize "seemed" and "but". My natural reading is more along the lines of "soil" as two syllables as it gives the emphasis in better places. Unfortunately, that also adds a syllable to the count. It's probably just one of those dialect things. I know that even though we're only geographically one state away, and not that much driving time, there are still some pretty big differences in our accents and speech patterns :-)
Now the alliteration, that's one of the wonderfully fine points of this poem. The whole piece is popping with it ("s", "f", "g", "l" sounds) as though the words are growing from the poem just as the flowers grow from the field! I particularly favor, "sea of sunshine," as well.
Excellent work, my friend. This poem was a pleasure to read tonight!
Teresa
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Hi Brooke!
Whew! Life gets crazy sometimes, but I love that I come here and find this lovely poem from you. Your triolet is beautiful. I love the lines you chose for repetition. I also think one of the complementing lines, "and life's full luster is revealed," is really filled with meaning involving how we perceive our lives and the beauty we can allow to grow there; unfortunately it might be under the surface and is never revealed after all.
The one little hitch I had with the poem, no matter how I read it, was the line, "Where soil once seemed fit but for graves." In Illinois the word "soil" is two syllables; here in Ohio it's one syllable. Either way I use it, though, the line doesn't balance out for me when it comes to the meter and syllables. With the one syllable pronunciation, it feels odd to emphasize "seemed" and "but". My natural reading is more along the lines of "soil" as two syllables as it gives the emphasis in better places. Unfortunately, that also adds a syllable to the count. It's probably just one of those dialect things. I know that even though we're only geographically one state away, and not that much driving time, there are still some pretty big differences in our accents and speech patterns :-)
Now the alliteration, that's one of the wonderfully fine points of this poem. The whole piece is popping with it ("s", "f", "g", "l" sounds) as though the words are growing from the poem just as the flowers grow from the field! I particularly favor, "sea of sunshine," as well.
Excellent work, my friend. This poem was a pleasure to read tonight!
Teresa
Comment Written 23-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thanks so much, Teresa - I appreciate your close reading and kind compliments and will give that line another look :-) Brooke
Comment from Dave M
Brooke,
A lot of your poems deserve six-star reviews, but nobody can give you more than two of these a month. This one certainly rates, and the site let me award it.
I've seen lots of sunflowers, but they're all black and gone to seed by now.
Dave
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Brooke,
A lot of your poems deserve six-star reviews, but nobody can give you more than two of these a month. This one certainly rates, and the site let me award it.
I've seen lots of sunflowers, but they're all black and gone to seed by now.
Dave
Comment Written 22-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you, Dave - I so appreciate your generosity and graciousness in all your reviews :-) Brooke
Comment from InHisownwrite
You say it like no one else.....
But, I say that all the time, huh?
It is however, so true...... Just like the pumpkin patch, you take us to a field of sunflowers, and creatively make it all the more beautiful.... Bryan
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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You say it like no one else.....
But, I say that all the time, huh?
It is however, so true...... Just like the pumpkin patch, you take us to a field of sunflowers, and creatively make it all the more beautiful.... Bryan
Comment Written 22-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thanks so very much, Bryan, for your lovely comments :-) Brooke
Comment from RKagan
Your poem brings to mind wide open fields of beautiful yellow flowers. The summer sun lights it all up. This is another lovely poem. You always write such great poetry.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Your poem brings to mind wide open fields of beautiful yellow flowers. The summer sun lights it all up. This is another lovely poem. You always write such great poetry.
Comment Written 22-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Thank you, RKagan - I so appreciate your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from Aussie
Boy, another All Time Best - what a week you are having! I liked your poem about the sea of sunshine. So descriptive and you created a lush vision of yellow that was soft and like walking on air. Well done Mrs. Plum.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Boy, another All Time Best - what a week you are having! I liked your poem about the sea of sunshine. So descriptive and you created a lush vision of yellow that was soft and like walking on air. Well done Mrs. Plum.
Comment Written 22-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2010
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Kay, thank you, my friend :-) Your gracious reviews are always cause for smiles. Brooke
