Kim
a strong Asian woman84 total reviews
Comment from BethShelby
This is an excellent story. It tells of the horrors many of these people have probably endured. You have developed this character well. I did have one question about her father teaching her mother to cook well but I'm not sure how her father cooked so well or how she learned to cook.
"She no fresh water and currently no food." (She had no..)
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2010
This is an excellent story. It tells of the horrors many of these people have probably endured. You have developed this character well. I did have one question about her father teaching her mother to cook well but I'm not sure how her father cooked so well or how she learned to cook.
"She no fresh water and currently no food." (She had no..)
Comment Written 10-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2010
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I corrected the copy editing error. Kim's father was French; in France, the men pride themselves on their cooking skills. As do most Asian women, Kim learned to cook from her mother. I'll try to work that in. Thanks for a good review.
Comment from LumchuckHickle
I like the way the stories blended together. There are a few sentences that don't work (at least for me), and the woman's voice seemed to waiver, sometimes flesh, sometimes a bit cliched, but all-in-all, it is a strong effort. The writing is inconsistent, but there are times that it is obvious that you have the potential of being an excellent writer. This is a good scaffold on which you could build a truly powerful story. Thank you for making it available. I enjoyed reading it.
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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2010
I like the way the stories blended together. There are a few sentences that don't work (at least for me), and the woman's voice seemed to waiver, sometimes flesh, sometimes a bit cliched, but all-in-all, it is a strong effort. The writing is inconsistent, but there are times that it is obvious that you have the potential of being an excellent writer. This is a good scaffold on which you could build a truly powerful story. Thank you for making it available. I enjoyed reading it.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2010
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Thank you for your review.
Comment from ulster3
Hello Alvin.
This fantastic write made me think of Madame Butterfly. Of course the circumstances were quite different. Your heroine is a woman of strength who keeps moving forward. This is an engrossing read. You should do very well in this contest. I surely wish you well, because this is a brilliant write.
Fondly, Rebecca
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2010
Hello Alvin.
This fantastic write made me think of Madame Butterfly. Of course the circumstances were quite different. Your heroine is a woman of strength who keeps moving forward. This is an engrossing read. You should do very well in this contest. I surely wish you well, because this is a brilliant write.
Fondly, Rebecca
Comment Written 10-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2010
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Thank you for this excellent review; you are more than kind.
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You wrote a fantastic story about a strong character. R
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Thank you; you are very kind.
Comment from Realist101
I have given this a five Alvin, I have no sixes left...this is haunting, and very realistic. I am sickened by the murder of an infant, but this is how it still is, in some parts of the world. Your character is a strong woman, which you did portray very vividly...I sure wish the world leaders would stop these things, I don't know how they could...but I know they should. I think this will do well in the contest too Alvin! ") Susan
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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2010
I have given this a five Alvin, I have no sixes left...this is haunting, and very realistic. I am sickened by the murder of an infant, but this is how it still is, in some parts of the world. Your character is a strong woman, which you did portray very vividly...I sure wish the world leaders would stop these things, I don't know how they could...but I know they should. I think this will do well in the contest too Alvin! ") Susan
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2010
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Thanks for a great review; I truly appreciate it. It is always heartening when the first review is this good. Thanks also for understanding the message.
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You are very welcome my friend. It will get lots of reviews too, I will see it on the front page tomorrow probably! ") That picture is a hard one to work with, I dared not even try! ") Susan
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It depends on how heavily I can promote it. At least fan notification has been sent out. Thanks for your kind words.