Another Pretty Face
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Chapter 1 Part one"Can love survive small town gossip?
98 total reviews
Comment from Begin Again
Barbara,
This already sounds like a wonderful story of love,conflict, and learning what's right for yourself. I can't wait for the story to continue. Great job!
Carol
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Barbara,
This already sounds like a wonderful story of love,conflict, and learning what's right for yourself. I can't wait for the story to continue. Great job!
Carol
Comment Written 23-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Thank you Carol, for the kind review. I appreciate your support.
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written and has left several unanswed questions. It has a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery and descriptive scheme.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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This is very well written and has left several unanswed questions. It has a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery and descriptive scheme.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review and support. I appreciate the six stars.
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You're welcome, Barbara. You earned the stars. Charlie
Comment from Belinda
Hi, Barbara, this seems to be a promising opening for a book. Many things exposed, yet many more hidden, to be unfolded in your interesting chapters. (I assume by now you are well...)
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Hi, Barbara, this seems to be a promising opening for a book. Many things exposed, yet many more hidden, to be unfolded in your interesting chapters. (I assume by now you are well...)
Comment Written 23-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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I am still unable to use my ankle and it looks like a about 4 more weeks. Thank you for your kind review. I appreciate your continued support.
Comment from RazberryBullet
Got a chuckle here: "Boy, did you ever grow up!" "That's usually what happens as a person ages." ;p
Zinnnng!!! "I'm escorting Sara. How much are the tickets?"
suggestion: Joe's attention /when>went?/ straight to the voice
Liked how Joe 'turned off' Sarah ;p Good job!
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Got a chuckle here: "Boy, did you ever grow up!" "That's usually what happens as a person ages." ;p
Zinnnng!!! "I'm escorting Sara. How much are the tickets?"
suggestion: Joe's attention /when>went?/ straight to the voice
Liked how Joe 'turned off' Sarah ;p Good job!
Comment Written 23-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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I already fixed the when/went. I can't believe I did that. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from bowls
Well, you have me hooked already! Of course your readers will have to find out the identity of the father, and what happens in this relationship, and how the dance goes, and on and on. I enjoyed your relaxed style. There are a few typos I'd like to call to your attention. In the paragraph beginning JOE'S ATTENTION,you say WHEN straight instead of WENT STRAIGHT. In the paragraph beginning YOU GRADUATED, you have WAS SENT instead of WERE SENT. In the paragraph beginning SO SHE'S A TOMBOY, you have WAS UNDERFOOT with the subject YOU, instead of WERE.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Well, you have me hooked already! Of course your readers will have to find out the identity of the father, and what happens in this relationship, and how the dance goes, and on and on. I enjoyed your relaxed style. There are a few typos I'd like to call to your attention. In the paragraph beginning JOE'S ATTENTION,you say WHEN straight instead of WENT STRAIGHT. In the paragraph beginning YOU GRADUATED, you have WAS SENT instead of WERE SENT. In the paragraph beginning SO SHE'S A TOMBOY, you have WAS UNDERFOOT with the subject YOU, instead of WERE.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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I struggles with those was and were, because the singular is was, but when I read it, were sounded better. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from suzzy
yes you did a good job introducing characters and still left me with a hook to know who the father of Sara's daughter is and is he the reason she left school besides she was pregnant-this is a good read-good first chapter
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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yes you did a good job introducing characters and still left me with a hook to know who the father of Sara's daughter is and is he the reason she left school besides she was pregnant-this is a good read-good first chapter
Comment Written 23-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from bhogg
You really, really know how to spin a good tale! I'm anxious to follow this one. What a great start. Appeared to be well edited like all of your work. Written in a way where the reader can really zip through. You're so boring ... you always do a great job!
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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You really, really know how to spin a good tale! I'm anxious to follow this one. What a great start. Appeared to be well edited like all of your work. Written in a way where the reader can really zip through. You're so boring ... you always do a great job!
Comment Written 23-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your review, but I don't want to bore you. I want you to keep reading.
Comment from lola29
Barbara, I really enjoyed this story. It seems everyone likes Joe Barnes, and before he can even exit his car, traffic is all around him. Didn't take him too long to notice Sara.
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reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Barbara, I really enjoyed this story. It seems everyone likes Joe Barnes, and before he can even exit his car, traffic is all around him. Didn't take him too long to notice Sara.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2010
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Nope, he honed in on Sara immediately. Think sparks will fly? Thank you for your review.
