Writings From the Heart
Viewing comments for Chapter 33 "The Friend"A book of Poetry & Writing
97 total reviews
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi GW,
Ooooh, I would not want to meet that pooch in a dark alley, unless I was its friend -- really good friend!
Nice sentiment about friendship.
Cheers &
Keep Smilin'.... Jax
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Hi GW,
Ooooh, I would not want to meet that pooch in a dark alley, unless I was its friend -- really good friend!
Nice sentiment about friendship.
Cheers &
Keep Smilin'.... Jax
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from adewpearl
good alliteration in soldier skilled
and in sailor on the sea
and in means that men
a thoughtful look at the nature of true friendship
Brooke
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good alliteration in soldier skilled
and in sailor on the sea
and in means that men
a thoughtful look at the nature of true friendship
Brooke
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from Tegan1311
A very well written poem. Your words flowed well with the exception of just a few lines. 2nd to last, "Will shelters..." I think it should be shelter. And in the 5th to last, "It means that men have confidence, when sleep at night" The last part makes it confusing. Maybe it should be 'sleeping' instead. Just my opinion that it might flow better.
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A very well written poem. Your words flowed well with the exception of just a few lines. 2nd to last, "Will shelters..." I think it should be shelter. And in the 5th to last, "It means that men have confidence, when sleep at night" The last part makes it confusing. Maybe it should be 'sleeping' instead. Just my opinion that it might flow better.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from Jackarrie
I like the principle of the poem, But this part did not make sense.
Here's a phrase that stands for much,
A friend who stands for you there,
It means that men have confidence, when sleep at night
untroubled he may rest
Men have confidence and are troubled do not go well together.
I think you mean asleep and not sleep
Mary
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I like the principle of the poem, But this part did not make sense.
Here's a phrase that stands for much,
A friend who stands for you there,
It means that men have confidence, when sleep at night
untroubled he may rest
Men have confidence and are troubled do not go well together.
I think you mean asleep and not sleep
Mary
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from royowen
A lovely sentiment in this well written work, I'm not sure about the photo of the dog to gird your poem, but it's a nice photo! But the sentiment of a job well done is quite often a peaceful thing, I think it's normal for most humans to be both! Well done, good philosophy, blessings, Roy.
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A lovely sentiment in this well written work, I'm not sure about the photo of the dog to gird your poem, but it's a nice photo! But the sentiment of a job well done is quite often a peaceful thing, I think it's normal for most humans to be both! Well done, good philosophy, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from Aplgwest
Though I see a few places where grammar and phrasing are a bit off, overall this poem is strong in its message and pacing.
My suggestions:
1. delete: "It meaning"
2. I don't think you need a colon after "him."
3. "When asleep" (you could delete "at night")
4. "...they may rest." (since men is in the line above)
5. "Will shelter" or "And shelters"
--Elaine
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Though I see a few places where grammar and phrasing are a bit off, overall this poem is strong in its message and pacing.
My suggestions:
1. delete: "It meaning"
2. I don't think you need a colon after "him."
3. "When asleep" (you could delete "at night")
4. "...they may rest." (since men is in the line above)
5. "Will shelter" or "And shelters"
--Elaine
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
I am totally torn on this and had to decide whether to follow my heart or the rule book. Being an angel I decided on the latter LOL. I like the message and find it to be a moving piece. One tiny suggestion (I am staying off the grammar and such since there is no sense beating a dead horse) - rather than use the same word over and over, try to find creative substitutes for it as that will engage your readers even further. Nicely done and I thank you so much for sharing this with me.
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I am totally torn on this and had to decide whether to follow my heart or the rule book. Being an angel I decided on the latter LOL. I like the message and find it to be a moving piece. One tiny suggestion (I am staying off the grammar and such since there is no sense beating a dead horse) - rather than use the same word over and over, try to find creative substitutes for it as that will engage your readers even further. Nicely done and I thank you so much for sharing this with me.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Friends what a term. I have had friends my whole life, but...when I had breast cancer a few years ago and underwent
chemo and radiation treat, it was interesting who stayed by me and was willing to help and who did not. Friends. WOW! I enjoyed reading your well written and well thought out poem.
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Friends what a term. I have had friends my whole life, but...when I had breast cancer a few years ago and underwent
chemo and radiation treat, it was interesting who stayed by me and was willing to help and who did not. Friends. WOW! I enjoyed reading your well written and well thought out poem.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from words
Your verse reminds me of a pharse I always heard growing up: to have a true friend, first you have to be one.
I have lived under a fortunate star for all of my life. I have been blessed with true and loyal friends including many canine ones.
I appreciate your heartfelt write.
d
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Your verse reminds me of a pharse I always heard growing up: to have a true friend, first you have to be one.
I have lived under a fortunate star for all of my life. I have been blessed with true and loyal friends including many canine ones.
I appreciate your heartfelt write.
d
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
Comment from DR DIP
just read your profile deepwater. It's funny you mention the oil industry for I have been a refinery operator/technician for the past 35 years at Caltex Australia.
really enjoy your theme here and totally agree with your sentiments..well done!
dip
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just read your profile deepwater. It's funny you mention the oil industry for I have been a refinery operator/technician for the past 35 years at Caltex Australia.
really enjoy your theme here and totally agree with your sentiments..well done!
dip
Comment Written 16-Jun-2014
