Reviews from

Writings From the Heart

Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Dear old Gram,"
A book of Poetry & Writing

124 total reviews 
Comment from suzzy
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

i can tell you loved your grandmother very much and was proud of her accomplishments she endured to the end. this poem made me feel your grandmothers pride to endure so she could leave her land to comfort her family in the end.

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thank you Suzzy for your welcome review
Comment from InHisownwrite
Excellent
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Wow... I always learn so much from your writing...
This, no exception.... I often wished I would have taken the time to sit down and talk with my gram about the Depression, etc.. But in the foolishness Of youth, I didn't... This reminds me of that.... Love how you say it all... your whole visual approach.... Bryan

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thank you Bryan for your review and comments Gary
reply by InHisownwrite on 14-Jun-2010
    You are welcome... Boy, the wisdom we can learn, we sadly sometimes run right past.. Bryan
Comment from zoocq
Excellent
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Wonderful story of history and pain and survival with your poem. Very moving and what a wonderful eulogy to your grandmother. Thank you.

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thank you again zoocq for your review
Comment from pugrpoems
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Outstanding!! I like the tone , colors, and inner and outer rhymes. There's so much in a small piece. Wonderful. I also like the flow of the piece. Awesome!!

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thank you pugrpoems for your review and the comments Gary
Comment from Kathryn Varuzza
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow!
This is beautiful.
And powerful.
And heartfelt.
This is the first chapter I've read of your book, so I don't know what went before, but I like this one very much.
Great photo.
I like the writing you chose for this poem as well.
Good title.
I love the rhymes.
I love the sounds of your words.
And I love the story in the poem.
Okay, I was going to give you a 5 star for this, but the more I read it and thought about it, I've decided I have to give you a 6 star, and I actually have one, so here you go.
Great job.
And nice to meet you.
Kathryn

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thank you again Kathryn and please if you get time go read the book, and nice to meet you to Gary
reply by Kathryn Varuzza on 14-Jun-2010
    Gary, you're welcome. Okay, when I get time, I will read your book.
    Kathryn
Comment from Gideon Roth
Excellent
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Hello Deepwater, I enjoyed reading Dear Old Gram just now. It brought to the surface of my thoughts, the research I have done on man's tyranny toward other men.
Good job on this...Gideon

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thank you Gideon for your review Gary
Comment from rama devi
Excellent
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This is a beautiful, poetic and inspired tribute to Gram with fine reference to history. Culturally and emotionally charged. Very well done!

one spag suggestion-

A prisoner of war(,) she learned to endure

Also, the reverse syntax in two lines weakens the tone just a bit (not enough to deduct a star but felt to mention).


Favorite lines

Defending the meek and supporting the weak

From the darkest of internment and toil

Fine presentation with apt artwork.

Thanks for sharing.

warmly, rd

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thank you rama for the review and comment
Comment from marcellawachtel
Excellent
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Yes, you miss her, but you'll have for the rest of your life the knowledge of what she did that makes your life different now from what it could have been if you hadn't had her.
The poem is wall written. I believe it could have used some fleshing-out- some detail to make her more than a grandma. Defending the meek and supporting the weak- good, but I think the poem needs a bit more.

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thanks for the comment marcell
Comment from luisestable
Good
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This is , to some degree, a good poem. I found it soft in diction given the even that it tries to cover.

We do not know the cause of death, but only that she passed away, how and what the cause the poem does not say.

I find this poem kind of light, though the situation here is serious and your intention is to make us see the gravity of the happening, but it does not come powerful and strong in the writing.

Good effort, though!

Keep on trying to get better.

Luis

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    great
Comment from medicnate
Excellent
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A very well written poem that keeps the readers interested and wanting more. The poem flows well and gets its point across. Very well done.

~medicnate~

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 14-Jun-2010
    thank you for the review medicnate