Lost at Sea
contemplative quatrains90 total reviews
Comment from paul in australia
beautifully crafted work, as usual, I guess it also hit a responsive chord with me as Australia is an Island, we know the isolation that brings, the sea which dominates, and the need for guiding stars. Well done, Regards Paul
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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beautifully crafted work, as usual, I guess it also hit a responsive chord with me as Australia is an Island, we know the isolation that brings, the sea which dominates, and the need for guiding stars. Well done, Regards Paul
Comment Written 07-May-2010
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Thank you, Paul - talk about someone's being prolific! LOL Brooke :-D
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GRIN
Comment from Fleedleflump
I found a home inside your shell
and evermore within you dwelled,
to leech upon your lonely life
and suckle on your desperate strife.
Oh ocean, you aren't rid of me!
I am the ship that's sailing free,
I cut right through your every breath
and mount your peaks unto our deaths.
Mike
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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I found a home inside your shell
and evermore within you dwelled,
to leech upon your lonely life
and suckle on your desperate strife.
Oh ocean, you aren't rid of me!
I am the ship that's sailing free,
I cut right through your every breath
and mount your peaks unto our deaths.
Mike
Comment Written 07-May-2010
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Thanks so much, Mike - leech upon your lonely life - you're back into the dark stuff, I see :-) Brooke
Comment from DecrepitOldBag
Brooke, this is just beautiful -- particularly since I am scared of boats and the sea. It's almost enough to make me turn to religion! Not a word needs changing, your work is always perfect.
Hugs
Kat
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Brooke, this is just beautiful -- particularly since I am scared of boats and the sea. It's almost enough to make me turn to religion! Not a word needs changing, your work is always perfect.
Hugs
Kat
Comment Written 07-May-2010
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Now you've made me laugh - thanks, Kat :-) Brooke
Comment from bayoupoet
Brooke, this is so beautiful and such an inspiration. You have described Faith and the Power of God's Mercy so well. It is always a pleasure to read for you.
sandra
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Brooke, this is so beautiful and such an inspiration. You have described Faith and the Power of God's Mercy so well. It is always a pleasure to read for you.
sandra
Comment Written 07-May-2010
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Thank you, Sandra - so glad you found meaning in this :-) Brooke
Comment from Gaye Hemsley
Hi Brooke Your poem describes so well what it would be like lost at sea which also reflects one lost in life. It's a great comparison. Cheers Gaye
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Hi Brooke Your poem describes so well what it would be like lost at sea which also reflects one lost in life. It's a great comparison. Cheers Gaye
Comment Written 07-May-2010
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Thanks so much, Gaye - so good to hear from you :-) Brooke
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Once again you wrote a very beautiful poem about God's promise to us. He is always there for us, not to stop the bad things from happening but to assist us through them, even in death.
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Once again you wrote a very beautiful poem about God's promise to us. He is always there for us, not to stop the bad things from happening but to assist us through them, even in death.
Comment Written 06-May-2010
reply by the author on 07-May-2010
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Thank you so much, Barbara, for your thoughtfulness. Brooke :-)
Comment from flygirl254
Brooke,
This is a wonderfully inspirational poem. I like it's descriptive wording about the storm and how desperate the hour had become. The whole poem, for me, parallel's the panic on the sea when the storm was overtaking a certain fishing boat while a certain Savior slept. Once He woke, he taught a lesson in faith and prayer by calming the sea.
I love the meter and the rhythm. I love the rhymes. I love the message. You have some really good word choices, such as "ghastly." That's a great one! I also like that the poem can be tied together from first stanza, when this person was searching for a safe harbor or shelter, to the last stanza when God took control and became that safe harbor and shelter.
Excellent poem, my friend! Full of wonderful meaning.
Teresa
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Brooke,
This is a wonderfully inspirational poem. I like it's descriptive wording about the storm and how desperate the hour had become. The whole poem, for me, parallel's the panic on the sea when the storm was overtaking a certain fishing boat while a certain Savior slept. Once He woke, he taught a lesson in faith and prayer by calming the sea.
I love the meter and the rhythm. I love the rhymes. I love the message. You have some really good word choices, such as "ghastly." That's a great one! I also like that the poem can be tied together from first stanza, when this person was searching for a safe harbor or shelter, to the last stanza when God took control and became that safe harbor and shelter.
Excellent poem, my friend! Full of wonderful meaning.
Teresa
Comment Written 06-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Teresa, first, congrats on winning the short love poem contest that a bazillion people entered!! :-) Second, thank you for a thorough and thoughtful review :-) Brooke
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Brooke, I tell you, I got home at about 1:30 a.m. with Francesanne because she went to the ER with some abdominal pain. It's a gastric thing going around, so she's fine, but the closest hospital is 45 minutes through the hills. I opened the computer up at around 3 a.m. and saw the message and I literally sat staring at the screen with my mouth hanging open, and everyone was asleep so I couldn't even tell anybody! Okay, so I woke people up to tell them, but that's not the point...I was really shocked and felt very honored to win. Thanks!
Teresa
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A night of great contrasts, huh? It is very cool, even if you did wake your family out of sound sleep. LOL
Comment from LauraKatherine
Beautiful and thoughtful poem, Brooke.
One thing in particular struck a chord with me. In the third stanza, it appears the narrator turns to prayer as a last resort. I heard a radio DJ talking about how many times, she hits a hard time (or a frustrating time or whatever) and tries every other means of saving herself before finally remembering to pray and place her faith in God to get her through this trial.
Seems to me that this poem could describe a situation such as this, or, alternately, the situation a desperate unbeliever finds him/herself in before finally turning to God and being "found" and being at peace with God. (Hope that made sense.)
From a technical aspect, beautifully written. I like these lines in particular:
No bells were tolled to sound alarm (For some reason, the phrase "bells were tolled" always reminds me of Donne's poem about "ask not for whom the bell tolls/It tolls for thee"; good sense of irony that I would think of that quote in light of the meaning of your phrase)
whose waves conspired I be alone
each wave caressed me with support
Excellent work. LK
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Beautiful and thoughtful poem, Brooke.
One thing in particular struck a chord with me. In the third stanza, it appears the narrator turns to prayer as a last resort. I heard a radio DJ talking about how many times, she hits a hard time (or a frustrating time or whatever) and tries every other means of saving herself before finally remembering to pray and place her faith in God to get her through this trial.
Seems to me that this poem could describe a situation such as this, or, alternately, the situation a desperate unbeliever finds him/herself in before finally turning to God and being "found" and being at peace with God. (Hope that made sense.)
From a technical aspect, beautifully written. I like these lines in particular:
No bells were tolled to sound alarm (For some reason, the phrase "bells were tolled" always reminds me of Donne's poem about "ask not for whom the bell tolls/It tolls for thee"; good sense of irony that I would think of that quote in light of the meaning of your phrase)
whose waves conspired I be alone
each wave caressed me with support
Excellent work. LK
Comment Written 06-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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LK, your observations are most insightful. You're so right - many people only have a conversation with God when they are sending out an S.O.S - far fewer walk through a flowery field and thank Him. Brooke :-)
Comment from InHisownwrite
Beautiful.... Can't say enough about it... we have all be here before.. I can picture many instances in my life where I felt like this... but you say it so well for me..
And out in a storm at sea.... you can't top the last verse.... I love it! Bryan
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Beautiful.... Can't say enough about it... we have all be here before.. I can picture many instances in my life where I felt like this... but you say it so well for me..
And out in a storm at sea.... you can't top the last verse.... I love it! Bryan
Comment Written 06-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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You are most kind, Bryan - thank you :-) Brooke
Comment from rmdelta
Brooke,
beautifully written, as always, dear friend. You know me by now, so you know the last part confused me. Are you saying the character died, the boat sank or the wind and seas suddenly calmed and all were saved?
Reggie
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Brooke,
beautifully written, as always, dear friend. You know me by now, so you know the last part confused me. Are you saying the character died, the boat sank or the wind and seas suddenly calmed and all were saved?
Reggie
Comment Written 06-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Thank you, Reggie :-) I am saying either. LOL It is deliberately ambiguous - it can be read either way - God saved the speaker physically, or God welcomed the speaker "home." Brooke
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As Jack Benny used to say, "Now...Stop that."
