The Plan
A married woman settles the score.80 total reviews
Comment from raw form
Well Bob it is a good start and I like the way you show the different sides of the main character in so few words I can only hope to write on point like this, it does happen just not often enough. Good Stuff I'd definitely turn the page to read more.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
  |
Well Bob it is a good start and I like the way you show the different sides of the main character in so few words I can only hope to write on point like this, it does happen just not often enough. Good Stuff I'd definitely turn the page to read more.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
-
Thank you, Stephen. I appreciate your input as ususal..Bob
Comment from Judian James
Good Morning Bob! "The inventory included his annoying table manners, his rudeness to her friends and relatives, his poo-pooing her religious beliefs, his violent jealousy, his cheap and repeated adulteries, his premature ejaculation and of course his rotten choice of after-shave" Oh, what a list. Thanks for the wonderful laugh out loud moment. "and at no time had He specifically counseled her to start an affair with a limo driver from Oyster Bay." A great start to a novel. Excellent piece of writing. Thanks!
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
|
Good Morning Bob! "The inventory included his annoying table manners, his rudeness to her friends and relatives, his poo-pooing her religious beliefs, his violent jealousy, his cheap and repeated adulteries, his premature ejaculation and of course his rotten choice of after-shave" Oh, what a list. Thanks for the wonderful laugh out loud moment. "and at no time had He specifically counseled her to start an affair with a limo driver from Oyster Bay." A great start to a novel. Excellent piece of writing. Thanks!
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
-
And thank you, Judian...I appreciate your fantastic review....Bob
-
I thought you and I had become fans, but I never received a PM for this and then realized (too many fans) that I never get PM's for your work. I find you in bonus reviewing or if you hit the front page,as you did this morning. I'm becoming a fan. It makes it so much easier. Then, even if I can't review everything you post, at least I will know when you do and not miss anything. Thanks Bob, Jude
-
Hi, Jude. That was my whole point in asking you if you intended to review my work...LOl...I weeded out people who just weren't...Imdon't care how long it takes to review my work, as long as people do...especially if i consistently try to review all of theirs...you understand, I'm sure. I have noticed recently that you are reviewing my work and I believe i should do the same. If you are not getting PMs you should resign me as a fan as will I..If there is still a problem...ask tom about it. thanks again, Jude...You are always so sweet and a great poet...Bob (PS I post only about once every ten days and I always pay well. Never expect somebody to read my work for 2 cents...LOL..Bob
-
So I'm not crazy. At one time, we were or you were, fans? Well, I'm glad we got that settled!!
Comment from patmedium
Wonderful... I could see the bottom approaching with concern because I had not learned enough! This would do well to be continued. Pat.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
|
Wonderful... I could see the bottom approaching with concern because I had not learned enough! This would do well to be continued. Pat.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
-
Thanks Pat..LOL...I'm glad you liked it...Bob
-
xxx
Comment from LovnPeace
probably did not intend for her to have torrid reckless sex with the first ... she ...I think a word is missing here.
Your writing really is impressive to me in it's reality Bob. Luck in the contest. Blessings. Barbara
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
|
probably did not intend for her to have torrid reckless sex with the first ... she ...I think a word is missing here.
Your writing really is impressive to me in it's reality Bob. Luck in the contest. Blessings. Barbara
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
-
Thanks so much, barb...Yes, a word is recovered now....LOL...Bob
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
great start....got my attnetion, Bob, and kept it to the end. Would love to read more....good luc in the contest Hugs and smiles, Susanne
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
|
great start....got my attnetion, Bob, and kept it to the end. Would love to read more....good luc in the contest Hugs and smiles, Susanne
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
-
Thanks, Susanne. I sincerely appreciate that...Bob
Comment from jwlee211
I like this work. Reordering priorities would be a great idea for Renee. I am not sure the list of positives truly outweigh his faults. Good work
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
|
I like this work. Reordering priorities would be a great idea for Renee. I am not sure the list of positives truly outweigh his faults. Good work
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
-
Thank you so much, Jwlee. Bob
Comment from btruax
Wow, this will be one heck of a book. Get to work on it NOW! I want to read it. I think you have a great beginning and a heroine who may not be a heroine. Good luck on the contest.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2010
|
Wow, this will be one heck of a book. Get to work on it NOW! I want to read it. I think you have a great beginning and a heroine who may not be a heroine. Good luck on the contest.
Comment Written 28-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2010
-
Thank you so much for your enthusiasm, bt. I plan to do something with it...However I have to finish the my "falling Up the Stairs" which I'm presently writing hewre on line. I would be honored if you would check out chapter one. Bless you and welcome aboard Fanstory! Bob
Comment from RazberryBullet
This is faultless! The characters and actions are perfect and presented with sly humor ;p
Loved these lines: his premature ejaculation and of course his rotten choice of after-shave.LOL!!!..Many Sundays she'd gone to church and asked God what to do, and at no time had He specifically counseled her to start an affair with a limo driver from Oyster Bay. But that's what happened. hahaha!...Blair had to go. :)
Beautiful!
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2010
 |
This is faultless! The characters and actions are perfect and presented with sly humor ;p
Loved these lines: his premature ejaculation and of course his rotten choice of after-shave.LOL!!!..Many Sundays she'd gone to church and asked God what to do, and at no time had He specifically counseled her to start an affair with a limo driver from Oyster Bay. But that's what happened. hahaha!...Blair had to go. :)
Beautiful!
Comment Written 28-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2010
-
Thanks so much, Razz. I sincerely appreciate your generous review nd the sixer is icing on the cake! Bob
Comment from MizKat
Bob - I love how you use words so magnificently. This is well written, besides being a interesting read. This beginning has piqued my interest. It sounds like Renee will 'off' her husband or hire someone to do it. I hope there will be more of this. Kat
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2010
|
Bob - I love how you use words so magnificently. This is well written, besides being a interesting read. This beginning has piqued my interest. It sounds like Renee will 'off' her husband or hire someone to do it. I hope there will be more of this. Kat
Comment Written 28-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2010
-
Thanks so much, Kat. I appreciate you as usual with your fine insights and reviews...Bob
Comment from Alison Williams
Bob, you have such a talent for writing characters, I love your descriptions and I think this would certainly be an idea that you need to stop kicking around in your head, and get down on paper (or screen, whichever the case may be).
I would love to read further if you develop it.
The conversational way you introduce the story of Renee, the great opening with a list of Blair's faults, and her cons list, heh, grabbed my attention. I love the reasoning and again we see a slight touch of humour in her reasonings about God and what He would think. Heh. It made me chuckle,
"Many Sundays she'd gone to church and asked God what to do, and at no time had He specifically counseled her to start an affair with a limo driver from Oyster Bay. " A wonderful line.
Again, you get us completely on side with Renee, despite a perceived shallowness from her initial thoughts, with a list of Blair's philandering ways and domineering nature, and that was with just a few short sketches of your pen. Nicely done.
I like the way you've sketched the principal characters so neatly and as a seamless part of the introduction, without belabouring them and still keeping some mystery, very skillfull woven.
Can't help thinking the chauffeur driver may end up being a means to an end for her emancipation and growth as a character. I also got the sense, though can't define exactly what narrative you've used to achieve it, that she may even do away with Blair, get the insurance and will money and make off into the sunset with the limo driver. LOL!
It's quite telling that Craig is knocking the idea to her, perhaps he has ulterior motives as well? That would be worth exploring. Perhaps he makes a living out of conning rich widows and bored and lonely wives.
Heh. the possibilities are endless.
I really enjoyed it. I do hope you develop it later on.
Cheers, Ali x
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2010
|
Bob, you have such a talent for writing characters, I love your descriptions and I think this would certainly be an idea that you need to stop kicking around in your head, and get down on paper (or screen, whichever the case may be).
I would love to read further if you develop it.
The conversational way you introduce the story of Renee, the great opening with a list of Blair's faults, and her cons list, heh, grabbed my attention. I love the reasoning and again we see a slight touch of humour in her reasonings about God and what He would think. Heh. It made me chuckle,
"Many Sundays she'd gone to church and asked God what to do, and at no time had He specifically counseled her to start an affair with a limo driver from Oyster Bay. " A wonderful line.
Again, you get us completely on side with Renee, despite a perceived shallowness from her initial thoughts, with a list of Blair's philandering ways and domineering nature, and that was with just a few short sketches of your pen. Nicely done.
I like the way you've sketched the principal characters so neatly and as a seamless part of the introduction, without belabouring them and still keeping some mystery, very skillfull woven.
Can't help thinking the chauffeur driver may end up being a means to an end for her emancipation and growth as a character. I also got the sense, though can't define exactly what narrative you've used to achieve it, that she may even do away with Blair, get the insurance and will money and make off into the sunset with the limo driver. LOL!
It's quite telling that Craig is knocking the idea to her, perhaps he has ulterior motives as well? That would be worth exploring. Perhaps he makes a living out of conning rich widows and bored and lonely wives.
Heh. the possibilities are endless.
I really enjoyed it. I do hope you develop it later on.
Cheers, Ali x
Comment Written 28-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2010
-
Thanks so much, Ali. Coming from a fine writer like you I am encouraged. first i have to finish my "Falling Up the Stairs book....LOL...Bob
-
Congratulations on a very well deserved win! It's a great one, can't wait to read more when you decided to develop it.
