rispettos
Viewing comments for Chapter 29 "Who Breathes the Air?"rispetto poetry
107 total reviews
Comment from perunest
I really enjoyed how you asked the
question in the first stanza and answer
it in the second. The juxtaposition of
two sides of reality really gets your point
across. Carolyn
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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I really enjoyed how you asked the
question in the first stanza and answer
it in the second. The juxtaposition of
two sides of reality really gets your point
across. Carolyn
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Thanks, Carolyn. I appreciate your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from AnnaLinda
Brooke,
Your rispetto reads like a proverb. I like your
use of the question in your first stanza and I found
your second stanza very strong and very well written
with fantastic rhymes:
"Tis he who chokes on fetid smog
as forests fall and highways clog
and shrugs his shoulders as if dumb
when asking what our world's become."
Linda
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Brooke,
Your rispetto reads like a proverb. I like your
use of the question in your first stanza and I found
your second stanza very strong and very well written
with fantastic rhymes:
"Tis he who chokes on fetid smog
as forests fall and highways clog
and shrugs his shoulders as if dumb
when asking what our world's become."
Linda
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
Comment from Nicnac
We should be grateful for all that we have been given. We are given a beautiful world to live in and we destroy it daily with carelessness and greed.
Your poem is very inspiring. I love the turn in the second stanza - it wakes one up to the damage we are doing to our children's world.
Very moving poetry. Nice flow and fabulous message.
A great kick in the butt - our nation needs it.
Preach on, sistah!! Love it.
Nic
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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We should be grateful for all that we have been given. We are given a beautiful world to live in and we destroy it daily with carelessness and greed.
Your poem is very inspiring. I love the turn in the second stanza - it wakes one up to the damage we are doing to our children's world.
Very moving poetry. Nice flow and fabulous message.
A great kick in the butt - our nation needs it.
Preach on, sistah!! Love it.
Nic
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Thank you, Nic. Sometimes I fear we need much more than a kick! Brooke :-)
Comment from Quire's Gal
I liked this one Brooke. I liked the fact that you choose something more satiric than you usually do. Liked the lines ..."place of pure beatitude". I haven't seen that word yet used on this site. Also loved "fetid smog"...nicely descriptive.
I wish more people would write about this theme, and then get it published. I'd love to see you put together a book of 'save the Earth' related poems for middle and high school-aged children to read and eventually write. I'm going to try to write a write a tutorial on how to write Haiku. What better way to get the message across than through poetry!
Have a great Sunday,
Katherine
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2010
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I liked this one Brooke. I liked the fact that you choose something more satiric than you usually do. Liked the lines ..."place of pure beatitude". I haven't seen that word yet used on this site. Also loved "fetid smog"...nicely descriptive.
I wish more people would write about this theme, and then get it published. I'd love to see you put together a book of 'save the Earth' related poems for middle and high school-aged children to read and eventually write. I'm going to try to write a write a tutorial on how to write Haiku. What better way to get the message across than through poetry!
Have a great Sunday,
Katherine
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2010
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Thank you, Katherine - glad you enjoyed the satire :-) You're right - using our writing for the greater good is something we should all be doing. Brooke
Comment from honeytree
So true and we hear about people smoking and throwing the butt anywhere that can start a fire.
I feel smoking anything should be banned, to cut the fire risk that can kill us.
Great Writing
Honeytree.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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So true and we hear about people smoking and throwing the butt anywhere that can start a fire.
I feel smoking anything should be banned, to cut the fire risk that can kill us.
Great Writing
Honeytree.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Thank you, Annie. I appreciate your kind review. Brooke :-)
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I always enjoy reading your words.
Annie
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I always enjoy reading your writing Brooke
love Annie
Comment from rhymelord
Dear Brooke,
You say it so well. Just been listening to a recording of Satchmo singing "Wonderful World", but that was written when the grass was greener and the air fresher. Ah, me!
Regards
Reg
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Dear Brooke,
You say it so well. Just been listening to a recording of Satchmo singing "Wonderful World", but that was written when the grass was greener and the air fresher. Ah, me!
Regards
Reg
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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I love that song, Reggie. Hopefully people will smarten up while some of us can still breathe. Brooke :-)
Comment from misscookie
I love the artwork it tells ie all
Your words are so powreful, its filled with outrage,pain and little hope foe the people will not listen or make a change
there is a atrong story within this poem . WE ARE KILLING OURSELVES.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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I love the artwork it tells ie all
Your words are so powreful, its filled with outrage,pain and little hope foe the people will not listen or make a change
there is a atrong story within this poem . WE ARE KILLING OURSELVES.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Thank you, Misscookie. Your insightful comments are most appreciated. Brooke
Comment from jack silver
people these days... We, humankind will never learn. if we don't do something now to protect the now it will be the future that is lost.
enjoyed reading. look forward to more.
from
Jack
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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people these days... We, humankind will never learn. if we don't do something now to protect the now it will be the future that is lost.
enjoyed reading. look forward to more.
from
Jack
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Thank you, Jack, and good morning. I truly appreciate this generous rating and your thoughtful comments - I'm so pleased you found the meaning in this poem. Brooke :-)
Comment from BlaccJacc
I feel like your talking about me in this one. Makes me feel guilty and I like that. Not the guilt so much as the feeling it inspires period. Good piece, very enjoyable.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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I feel like your talking about me in this one. Makes me feel guilty and I like that. Not the guilt so much as the feeling it inspires period. Good piece, very enjoyable.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Thank you, my friend - I don't think many of us are doing all we could yet :-) Brooke
Comment from L.lora
Such an excellently crafted
poem Brooke. Definitely one
that causes the reader to
stop and ponder though it is
a satire. How many really give
thought to what is happening in
the world or to our earth? no nits
or spags. Lora
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Such an excellently crafted
poem Brooke. Definitely one
that causes the reader to
stop and ponder though it is
a satire. How many really give
thought to what is happening in
the world or to our earth? no nits
or spags. Lora
Comment Written 13-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2010
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Thanks so much, Lora, for your thoughtful review. Be sure to read my review of your double tetractys as I want you to have a fair shot in that contest :-) Brooke
