Whispers in the Wind
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "The Deaf Dog --by BROOK ANNE"Brook's best lead dog is struck deaf
12 total reviews
Comment from stephonavich
I liked how you got immediately to the conflict with James. It makes me think he liiikkkkeeeessss her - even though she says different. We shall see. The emotion she has invested in her dogs is shown very well and gets you into the story. Great start! My only comment is maybe playing with the hook a little to make it stronger. But, for dog lovers (like me) it did get me interested. It just might not be enough for those who are "iffy" on dogs. Still, it's enjoyable!
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reply by the author on 09-Mar-2010
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I liked how you got immediately to the conflict with James. It makes me think he liiikkkkeeeessss her - even though she says different. We shall see. The emotion she has invested in her dogs is shown very well and gets you into the story. Great start! My only comment is maybe playing with the hook a little to make it stronger. But, for dog lovers (like me) it did get me interested. It just might not be enough for those who are "iffy" on dogs. Still, it's enjoyable!
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Comment Written 09-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2010
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Thanks so much for your comments, especially about the hook. I'll see if I can come up with more.
Comment from Jay Squires
May I take your name from "Spirit Basket" and call you Marie? I like the first chapter of your novel. You've established the plot question, have a strong heroine (with enough disdain for the antagonist that a romance is sure to develop), and a dog with plenty of spirit.
You know sled racing intimately, or have researched it a great deal. The reader feels the immediacy.
I am reminded by your story of a NBC story (I believe during the Olympic Games) about a blind sled dog who amazed everyone by still competing. Obviously not the lead dog! But, still ....
You've angled your novel to a good age group. I predict it will do well.
Blessings,
Jay
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reply by the author on 09-Mar-2010
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May I take your name from "Spirit Basket" and call you Marie? I like the first chapter of your novel. You've established the plot question, have a strong heroine (with enough disdain for the antagonist that a romance is sure to develop), and a dog with plenty of spirit.
You know sled racing intimately, or have researched it a great deal. The reader feels the immediacy.
I am reminded by your story of a NBC story (I believe during the Olympic Games) about a blind sled dog who amazed everyone by still competing. Obviously not the lead dog! But, still ....
You've angled your novel to a good age group. I predict it will do well.
Blessings,
Jay
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 08-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2010
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Sure you may call me by my real name. Thanks for checking out my published novel. I appreciate your comments about the first chapter of "Whispers in the Wind". I recall that blurb about the blind sled dog too. Thanks so much for your time and interest.
