Short Stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "The Killer Is --"A book of a mixture of stories
47 total reviews
Comment from Mrs Jones
She passed out in the lift? LOL I so enjoyed reading this. All these entries are so delightful. Well written Carol. The ending is classic. Good luck in the contest.
Cheers
Rose
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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She passed out in the lift? LOL I so enjoyed reading this. All these entries are so delightful. Well written Carol. The ending is classic. Good luck in the contest.
Cheers
Rose
Comment Written 05-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Rose,
The other writers really dug into this one too. The stories are excellent. Thank you for the kind review. Smiles, Carol
Comment from CKLA
I hope you had as much fun writing that as I did reading it. My guess would be that you made yourself the killer. Excellent entry. I wish you luck.
Collette
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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I hope you had as much fun writing that as I did reading it. My guess would be that you made yourself the killer. Excellent entry. I wish you luck.
Collette
Comment Written 04-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2010
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Collette,
Thanks so much for reading and enjoying. Everyone wrote fantastic ones, didn't they? Smiles, CArol
Comment from wierdgrace
I have to admit this is excellent, and what a great contest to be in, I bet you had fun writing this, and using the fan storians, great work, good luck in the contes.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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I have to admit this is excellent, and what a great contest to be in, I bet you had fun writing this, and using the fan storians, great work, good luck in the contes.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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wierdgrace,
Thank you so much for the kind review. Everyone did a fantastic job with this one. Smiles, Carol
Comment from chaswriter
Carol - We know it's not John or Lola. That leaves us with BeginAgain, the maid, and Adina. But I assume the comment of "the makings of a new best seller" must mean it's a writer, so the maid is out. Adina's earring was found in Malone's suite. And other evidence point to Lola and John. But there is no evidence on BeginAgain, so it must be her.
One comment:
size 6 stiletto = size six stiletto
Charlie
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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Carol - We know it's not John or Lola. That leaves us with BeginAgain, the maid, and Adina. But I assume the comment of "the makings of a new best seller" must mean it's a writer, so the maid is out. Adina's earring was found in Malone's suite. And other evidence point to Lola and John. But there is no evidence on BeginAgain, so it must be her.
One comment:
size 6 stiletto = size six stiletto
Charlie
Comment Written 04-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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Charlie...
Nice deduction my friend...Thanks for the great review and I truly appreciate you taking time time to read my little mystery. smiles to you..Carol
Comment from MercyWrites
I love your cosy mystery, and I like that you use your Fanstory's name. Good humor throughout the story. My only nitpick, I spotted the same word use very close together. Her teary eyes met the detective's before she lowered "them," dabbing "them" with a Kleenex. I was thinking maybe taking one of the words out and using something more specific. Her teary eyes met the detective before she lowered her eyelashes, dabbing them with a Kleenex.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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I love your cosy mystery, and I like that you use your Fanstory's name. Good humor throughout the story. My only nitpick, I spotted the same word use very close together. Her teary eyes met the detective's before she lowered "them," dabbing "them" with a Kleenex. I was thinking maybe taking one of the words out and using something more specific. Her teary eyes met the detective before she lowered her eyelashes, dabbing them with a Kleenex.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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Mercy,
Nice catch! You are so right about that and I shall adjust it asap. Thanks for the kind review and suggestions. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Judian James
OH, what fun. You left us hanging. I'm on the poetry side, so I only know a few of the top ten in prose. This was so much fun. Well written and Thesis is a devil in disguise, I guess ... excellent
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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OH, what fun. You left us hanging. I'm on the poetry side, so I only know a few of the top ten in prose. This was so much fun. Well written and Thesis is a devil in disguise, I guess ... excellent
Comment Written 04-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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Jude,
I am thrilled you enjoyed the story and thank you for the kind comments. It was definitely fun to write. Smiles, Carol
Comment from flygirl254
This is a very cute little story, and nicely put together. It has a good flow, with paragraph breaks and line lengths that allow the reader to have a nice rhythm that keeps them going through to the end. I like that you use dialogue to keep things moving along, so that you are showing us what's happening through action rather than telling us what's happening through narration. You've given us a very funny conclusion as well. Great work! Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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This is a very cute little story, and nicely put together. It has a good flow, with paragraph breaks and line lengths that allow the reader to have a nice rhythm that keeps them going through to the end. I like that you use dialogue to keep things moving along, so that you are showing us what's happening through action rather than telling us what's happening through narration. You've given us a very funny conclusion as well. Great work! Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 04-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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flygirl,
Wow...and I thought I just put words on paper. LOL You made me sound like there's a chance I know a little about what I'm doing...Wonders will never cease...HAHAHAH I needed a pick me up this morning..THANK YOU. SMILES, CAROL
Comment from sgalletti
Hi Carol! Reminds me of my recent six days on a jury in a criminal trial (for real!) about a man who assaulted two others with a semi-automatic weapon. But, this was much more fun! Extremely well written with a great punch line. Sue
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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Hi Carol! Reminds me of my recent six days on a jury in a criminal trial (for real!) about a man who assaulted two others with a semi-automatic weapon. But, this was much more fun! Extremely well written with a great punch line. Sue
Comment Written 03-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
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Sue,
Oh, that would have been a bit frightening I think...I'll stick to killers on paper if allowed. Smiles to you, Carol
Comment from Trybuck
The maid in the broom closet with a machette, just waiting around for her boss.
Who dunnit? I'm guessing it was Ms BeginAgain and again and again..
Well done as usual, Buck
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
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The maid in the broom closet with a machette, just waiting around for her boss.
Who dunnit? I'm guessing it was Ms BeginAgain and again and again..
Well done as usual, Buck
Comment Written 03-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
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Buck,
How come you aren't writing any of these little ditties? I know you can do a great job of it...Smiles to you, Carol
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Someone has to do the reading..:) Actually, I've been too busy on the farm to do much writing lately, maybe in a couple of weeks I'll have a little more time. Until then, I'll just enjoy yours :)
Comment from barbara.wilkey
You are becoming one fantastic author. I am loved your shor story. This was vey good. My dinner is beeping at me so I better get it from the oven, before my boys do bodily harm.
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
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You are becoming one fantastic author. I am loved your shor story. This was vey good. My dinner is beeping at me so I better get it from the oven, before my boys do bodily harm.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
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Barbara,
Thank you so much for the compliment and heavens to betsy don't let the dinner burn! Smiles to you, Carol
