Battlefield Lament
reflective naani (for war series)87 total reviews
Comment from Jarlsbane
Lovely, lovely brooke-- I like the use of florid, definitely a good tie-in with the poppy reference... but you know I think the bloom of the flower symbolizes the hope and recovery that occurs after the war is over and the last soldier's blood is spilled... nice one. -Michael
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2010
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Lovely, lovely brooke-- I like the use of florid, definitely a good tie-in with the poppy reference... but you know I think the bloom of the flower symbolizes the hope and recovery that occurs after the war is over and the last soldier's blood is spilled... nice one. -Michael
Comment Written 10-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2010
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Thank you, Michael, and good day! I always appreciate your insights. Brooke
Comment from IndianaIrish
Such a passionate verse, Brooke. Indeed, it is the life blood of a soldier that gives our lives reason to bloom and the freedom to grow.
Karyn :>)
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Such a passionate verse, Brooke. Indeed, it is the life blood of a soldier that gives our lives reason to bloom and the freedom to grow.
Karyn :>)
Comment Written 08-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Thank you, Karyn. I appreciate your gracious response to this poem :-) Brooke
Comment from Gaye Hemsley
Hi Brooke A beautiful reflective poem. The mention of the poppies is particually significant to our part of the world. Australis & New Zealand lost so many soldiers in the first world war we remember it every year by having a public holiday on April 25th 'Anzac Day' We all wear a red poppy and not only do we remember service men and women lost in the first world war but all wars our young poeple have fought in. LOL Gaye
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2010
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Hi Brooke A beautiful reflective poem. The mention of the poppies is particually significant to our part of the world. Australis & New Zealand lost so many soldiers in the first world war we remember it every year by having a public holiday on April 25th 'Anzac Day' We all wear a red poppy and not only do we remember service men and women lost in the first world war but all wars our young poeple have fought in. LOL Gaye
Comment Written 08-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2010
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Thank you, Gaye. I'm so glad you found meaning in this poem. Brooke
Comment from babylonia
brooke,
the poppies in the field are red as blood. nicely done. sigh. all too true. easy to read and follow. imagery is excellent. good luck~
love,
barbara
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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brooke,
the poppies in the field are red as blood. nicely done. sigh. all too true. easy to read and follow. imagery is excellent. good luck~
love,
barbara
Comment Written 08-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Thank you, Barbara. I appreciate your thoughtful review. Brooke :-)
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brooke,
you are very welcome~
love,
barbara
Comment from LauraKatherine
What a sad poem. You've picked a good title for it; this sounds like a lament. (Duh, it is one.) The tone is mournful and ironic.
Good use of irony with the "florid blossoms": the fields have people's blood flowing on the ground...definitely an image of death, not of freshness or health. But the blood adorns the ground like poppies on a tomb...so there's no need for poppies (or other flowers) to be planted here... sad. It's a garden of death, in a way; death is the only thing present here, blood waters the ground...sad and ironic.
Gosh, what can I say about this poem that would do it justice?! It's a great poem! Good luck in the contest. LK
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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What a sad poem. You've picked a good title for it; this sounds like a lament. (Duh, it is one.) The tone is mournful and ironic.
Good use of irony with the "florid blossoms": the fields have people's blood flowing on the ground...definitely an image of death, not of freshness or health. But the blood adorns the ground like poppies on a tomb...so there's no need for poppies (or other flowers) to be planted here... sad. It's a garden of death, in a way; death is the only thing present here, blood waters the ground...sad and ironic.
Gosh, what can I say about this poem that would do it justice?! It's a great poem! Good luck in the contest. LK
Comment Written 08-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Thank you, LK - as always, you totally understand what is going on, and it is so good to get that kind of feedback. :-) Brooke
Comment from Calanatan
Every time I review one of your pieces, I learn a little more about me. What makes one poem better than another? What makes one adewpearl poem better than her last? What makes me react THIS WAY to one poem but not to that poem, though each seems the equal of the other? I'm almost sure I cannot define it, but I know it when I feel it. Each of these defining moments gather in my mind, and someday perhaps they will form a sum that I WILL be able to relate.
Even without the picture, this rubicund naani paints a starkly beautiful and terrible emotion, hidden under the flowers, spread across these fields and soaked into the earth's soul. Are we humans so preoccupied with RED that we must always find ways to spill it from our veins?
You poetry is always entertaining, but certain ones--like this one--resonate within my emotional center. Thank you for sharing.
Best Wishes,
Calanatan
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Every time I review one of your pieces, I learn a little more about me. What makes one poem better than another? What makes one adewpearl poem better than her last? What makes me react THIS WAY to one poem but not to that poem, though each seems the equal of the other? I'm almost sure I cannot define it, but I know it when I feel it. Each of these defining moments gather in my mind, and someday perhaps they will form a sum that I WILL be able to relate.
Even without the picture, this rubicund naani paints a starkly beautiful and terrible emotion, hidden under the flowers, spread across these fields and soaked into the earth's soul. Are we humans so preoccupied with RED that we must always find ways to spill it from our veins?
You poetry is always entertaining, but certain ones--like this one--resonate within my emotional center. Thank you for sharing.
Best Wishes,
Calanatan
Comment Written 08-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Calanatan, thank you for this most thoughtful review with its most interesting comments. I often feel that way about poetry, wondering what defining quality makes one poem affect me more than another though both were obviously well written - and I feel that way about all my favorite poets - not every Emily Dickinson poem or Poe poem or Cummings poem ranks the same in my mind. I truly appreciate your most generous response to this poem. Brooke
Comment from Kashif Ali Abbas
A naani with such specialty of topic and thought is rare and i am fortunate to read this one. Two thumbs up! The greatest to me was the last line,
Rage lowers to a simmer as thoughts achieve manifestation
Beautiful!!!
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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A naani with such specialty of topic and thought is rare and i am fortunate to read this one. Two thumbs up! The greatest to me was the last line,
Rage lowers to a simmer as thoughts achieve manifestation
Beautiful!!!
Comment Written 08-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Thank you, Kashif Ali Abbas. I appreciate your most thoughtful review. Brooke :-)
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My pleasure:)
and please do check my works too.
Comment from rama devi
Superb brevity lends power to this poppy-flavored and crimson colored naani. Excellent subtle reference and impressive presentation. beautiful bonus rhyming too! excellent word choice---florid. the emotional impact of this work is poignant and well conveyed.
With added bonus of alliteration and internal rhyming.
Accomplishing all this in four lines deserves hearty applause!
Bravo.
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Superb brevity lends power to this poppy-flavored and crimson colored naani. Excellent subtle reference and impressive presentation. beautiful bonus rhyming too! excellent word choice---florid. the emotional impact of this work is poignant and well conveyed.
With added bonus of alliteration and internal rhyming.
Accomplishing all this in four lines deserves hearty applause!
Bravo.
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 08-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Thank you, rama devi - I appreciate your thoughtful attention to both composition and message. Brooke :-)
Comment from fionageorge
Stunning and powerful short naani poem, Brooke. an the artwork complements these words, which stand by themselves.
Yes, to save the poppies for the tomb, is a sad, sad tale.
Warmest regards and hugs
Marijke
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Stunning and powerful short naani poem, Brooke. an the artwork complements these words, which stand by themselves.
Yes, to save the poppies for the tomb, is a sad, sad tale.
Warmest regards and hugs
Marijke
Comment Written 08-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2010
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Marijke, thanks so much. I'm so glad you found the meaning in this poem. Brooke :-)
Comment from Belinda
What an impressive naani. I had to read it, leave it, read it again, all the while imagining those young one who shed their blood and lie under the florid poppies. The similarity of the colors is juxtaposed with the contrast betweenb the poppies and the bodies. While the flowers are so alive and fresh, the bodies below are lifeless. So strong a naani, this is...
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2010
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What an impressive naani. I had to read it, leave it, read it again, all the while imagining those young one who shed their blood and lie under the florid poppies. The similarity of the colors is juxtaposed with the contrast betweenb the poppies and the bodies. While the flowers are so alive and fresh, the bodies below are lifeless. So strong a naani, this is...
Comment Written 07-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2010
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Thanks so much, Belinda, for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
