freshly fallen flakes
a poem in 17 syllables90 total reviews
Comment from JeJo
This is a lovely poem in 5/6/6 and to me, it seems like a haiku, regardless of the syllable count, for it still has 17.
freshly fallen flakes - beautiful alliteration! fresh snowflakes are so pretty...
spread silence on the earth - I like how this describes the figurative meaning of the flakes, not only the physical aspect
ambassadors of peace - wonderful satori line and a great metaphor. I think colder weather/Christmas time does bring people closer together, even strangers. I know when a huge ice storm hit or when the power went out, all the neighbors try to help each other.
Lovely work... All the best, Jen
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2010
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This is a lovely poem in 5/6/6 and to me, it seems like a haiku, regardless of the syllable count, for it still has 17.
freshly fallen flakes - beautiful alliteration! fresh snowflakes are so pretty...
spread silence on the earth - I like how this describes the figurative meaning of the flakes, not only the physical aspect
ambassadors of peace - wonderful satori line and a great metaphor. I think colder weather/Christmas time does bring people closer together, even strangers. I know when a huge ice storm hit or when the power went out, all the neighbors try to help each other.
Lovely work... All the best, Jen
Comment Written 21-Oct-2010
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2010
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how delightful that you're reading a work from last year :-) Yes, despite our site contest's antiquated rules about 5/7/5, haiku do not need to be 5/7/5. :-) Thanks so much, Jen :-) Brooke
Comment from Colette
Hi Brooke,
This brings an absolutely beautiful picture to mind. If I may say
you don't need to use a picture your poetry creates it's own picture.
Truly wonderful!
Thank you for your lovely poetry through the year.
Colette.
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Hi Brooke,
This brings an absolutely beautiful picture to mind. If I may say
you don't need to use a picture your poetry creates it's own picture.
Truly wonderful!
Thank you for your lovely poetry through the year.
Colette.
Comment Written 24-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Thank you, Colette - I hope you're having a lovely Christmas Eve :-) Brooke
Comment from LauraKatherine
I have no inkling whether this is a haiku, either, Brooke. I'm not sure it matters in this case; the poem is well written. :)
I like the idea of the snowflakes covering the earth with silence, and how they are personified as "ambassadors of peace." The white blanket of snow over the earth seems like a covering over of differences (between the colors of nature, or more metaphorically, the differences between people) and thus tries to bring people together, bring peace to the warring peoples of our earth.
(Of course, in Alabama, when we get snow, there is grass and foliage, etc., stick up out of the "snowfall." We got snow one morning recently and could barely make a tiny snowman!)
Timely message. LK
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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I have no inkling whether this is a haiku, either, Brooke. I'm not sure it matters in this case; the poem is well written. :)
I like the idea of the snowflakes covering the earth with silence, and how they are personified as "ambassadors of peace." The white blanket of snow over the earth seems like a covering over of differences (between the colors of nature, or more metaphorically, the differences between people) and thus tries to bring people together, bring peace to the warring peoples of our earth.
(Of course, in Alabama, when we get snow, there is grass and foliage, etc., stick up out of the "snowfall." We got snow one morning recently and could barely make a tiny snowman!)
Timely message. LK
Comment Written 24-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Thank you, LK - a few people well-read on haiku have told me they would call it one, but I'm like you, I don't really care what it's called. We can make snowmen that scrape the clouds when we get a big storm. LOL Brooke :-)
Comment from mountainwriter49
Brooke, you could call it Brooksonian-ku. It works, whatever it is called. :) There is nothing more stunning than the profound silence during a snow storm and its quiet aftermath. Well done. I do have a question. Should the e in earth be capitalized since you're referring to the planet? Thanks for crafting and sharing your poetry. -ray
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Brooke, you could call it Brooksonian-ku. It works, whatever it is called. :) There is nothing more stunning than the profound silence during a snow storm and its quiet aftermath. Well done. I do have a question. Should the e in earth be capitalized since you're referring to the planet? Thanks for crafting and sharing your poetry. -ray
Comment Written 24-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Thanks so much, Ray, for your kind review. I usually do capitalize Earth when meaning the planet, but since this is a haiku and so many people question my use of capital E in other poems, I figured for the haiku I would just leave it lower case :-) Brooke
Comment from patmedium
Brooke ... as usual... beautiful brevity! The more I read the more I learn and the more I admire, frustratedly... as I have said before (and probably will ad nauseam) I AM FAR TOO VERBOSE!
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Brooke ... as usual... beautiful brevity! The more I read the more I learn and the more I admire, frustratedly... as I have said before (and probably will ad nauseam) I AM FAR TOO VERBOSE!
Comment Written 24-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Thanks, Pat - I'm unbelievably verbose, which is why I love to work in short forms - it shuts me up! LOL Brooke :-)
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if you think I'm taken in by that excuse... you're correct! bye for now
Comment from unbridledspirit
Marvelous. What a visualization and feeling of peace that comes over one who reads your poem. It evokes the right emotion that I think you were trying to achieve. Great job!
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Marvelous. What a visualization and feeling of peace that comes over one who reads your poem. It evokes the right emotion that I think you were trying to achieve. Great job!
Comment Written 24-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Thank you, unbridledspirit. I appreciate your kind review :-) Brooke
Comment from Julia.
Hi Brooke,
I don't know either if you could call this a haiku, but it still works for me. Nice little bit of imagery evoking the silence the often falls after fresh snow.
Merry Christmas!
Julia
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Hi Brooke,
I don't know either if you could call this a haiku, but it still works for me. Nice little bit of imagery evoking the silence the often falls after fresh snow.
Merry Christmas!
Julia
Comment Written 24-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Thank you, Julia - I have most of the people who read a lot about haiku telling me I can call it one. I don't care what it is called. :-) Thanks so much! Brooke
Comment from pugdogy
good job here!!!
I really enjoyed reading this piece of work.
I found this poem depicts the snow so well, with the word of peace used, as when standing in the snow it is soo peaceful. keep up the great work!!!!
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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good job here!!!
I really enjoyed reading this piece of work.
I found this poem depicts the snow so well, with the word of peace used, as when standing in the snow it is soo peaceful. keep up the great work!!!!
Comment Written 24-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2009
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Thank you, Pugdogy. I appreciate your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
Comment from nora arjuna
freshly fallen flakes
spread silence on the earth
ambassadors of peace
simply wonderful brooke. excellent imagery even without the presence of the picture.
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2009
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freshly fallen flakes
spread silence on the earth
ambassadors of peace
simply wonderful brooke. excellent imagery even without the presence of the picture.
Comment Written 23-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2009
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Thank you, Nora. I'm so pleased you enjoyed :-) Brooke
Comment from mstad55
When you talk of Flakes being Ambassadors, I would agree whole heartedly with you, however I don't know if they bring silence to earth. They tend to stir up the mix and create controversy. Mike
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2009
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When you talk of Flakes being Ambassadors, I would agree whole heartedly with you, however I don't know if they bring silence to earth. They tend to stir up the mix and create controversy. Mike
Comment Written 23-Dec-2009
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2009
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Mike, it is so good to see you, my flaky friend!!! You do so make me laugh :-) Brooke
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Well, I hope you have yourself a Merry Little Christmas. We will be going to my Mother-in-laws tonight for the big dinner after five o'clock mass. It's tradition. We eat to much and then sit around and groan and tell stories that we've all heard so many times, we can lip sync them all. Mike
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Ah yes, those stories, and remarkably enough, those stories in my family probably sound a lot like the stories in your family. LOL I'm so glad you will be with family, Mike, and enjoying traditions. Merry Christmas to you! Brooke :)
