Comment from nadanewstar

Excellent

The first lineset thr poem well. Who doesn't wonder what lurks inside the fog? And like your last line says who would want to know. Your words makes the whole poem sound mysterious.

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 30-Oct-2009

Thank you for your positive comments - since on this site a 4 rating indicates something is wrong and in need of fixing, I would appreciate your clarifying what problem you found with the poem. Brooke

reply by nadanewstar on 30-Oct-2009

your poem was written correctly in the form prpvided by the contest, I will see aboutchanging the grade. the problem with this site that someof us are here tolrarn from other writers and not have to beconstantly questionrd as to whycertain things are graded, One even hastolearn to review as well its evident that somewritersarebetterthanoyhersbut thesesites are forenjoyment regardlesss of the author's talent at it. I will see about changing your grade.

reply by the author on 30-Oct-2009

I appreciate your taking the time to revise your rating. All you need to do is go back to the poem and put the new number in.

Comment from becky7777

Excellent

I agree with you I dont think I would want to know but you are so right the fog can hide everything. great poem. good luck in the contest.
Becky

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 30-Oct-2009

Thanks so much, Becky - glad you enjoyed :-) Brooke

Comment from Blue Danube

Excellent

adewpearl:
I simply love reading "What does the fog conceal?" because of how you form the poem and what I find in these words.
Fog appeals to my senses unless it happens to be what I call blinding fog making driving a car difficult and dangerous.
The images I see while reading this poem are both the literal fog as caused by weather, the fog of mind and the fog around a person's feelings.
Very nice work, Brooke.

Blue

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 30-Oct-2009

Thank you, Blue - I'm so glad this one resonates with you. Brooke :-)

Comment from whizpurr ^-^

Excellent

Hi Pearly One,
You certainly are a master at the O.R. form of poetry. This is an appealing poem and it stirs the imagination. Fogs always are kind of mysterious and the picture you picked shouts mystery and intrigue. Well done!
Cheers,

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 30-Oct-2009

Thank you, Whizpurr - I appreciate your gracious comments :-) Brooke

Comment from Nicnac

Excellent

Some find a foggy morning spooky - but I find it beautiful. :) I love the calm and mysterious feel of this poem, Brooke. The idea of the fog hiding secrets we may not want to know is unique and interesting.

what melancholy voice reveal its fate? <--nice!

I enjoyed this piece.
Great descriptions.
No suggestions.
I really like the ottava rima form.
Nic

 Comment Written 21-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 21-Oct-2009

Thank you for liking that line - I've had a few people not understand its construction :-) I see snow angels is doing well in the essence poetry contest - good luck maintaining your lead :-) Brooke

Comment from MizKat

Excellent

A beautiful poem with a beautiful picture to go with it. They compliment each other. I enjoyed both and await your next contribution. Kat

 Comment Written 21-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 21-Oct-2009

Kat, thank you. You are most gracious :-) Brooke

Comment from Just2Write

Excellent

Hi Brooke - Another nice Ottava Rima that puts us in the mood for the big Boo day. Fog is kind of creepy - I guess because of the muted sounds, clamy feeling, and the fact that you can't see that which is crowding in on you. Still, I miss the fog. We used to get it for days on end at this time of year, and now it rarely makes an appearance. Rose.

 Comment Written 21-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 21-Oct-2009

Valley Forge National Park is 3 miles from me - I used to take the bridge over the Schuylkill River right next to the park to work, and some mornings the fog over the park was the most beautiful sight you could ever hope to see. Thanks so much, Rose. Brooke :-)

Comment from EllieKaye

Excellent

Hi Brooke,
Oh, what a beautiful poem. I agree. I am not so sure I want to know either. What surprises must lay in wait!

I found a small editing job and am not in here as often as I like. I sure wish we had more than three days! If I miss any of yours, please know it is not intentional. :)

 Comment Written 21-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 21-Oct-2009

I'm happy you have the job :-) And you can always look through my portfolio - consider it an open invitation :-) Thanks so much, my friend. Brooke

Comment from Annmuma

Excellent

This poem has that Halloween feel to it, and I love it. The artwork reminded me of the South Louisiana cypress trees --even though there was no moss hanging. Great poem. ann

 Comment Written 21-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 21-Oct-2009

Thank you, Ann - oh, cypress trees with moss, that DOES sound Halloweeny :-) Brooke

Comment from rhymelord

Excellent

Another goody from the local master (oops, sorry, mistress) of this genre. Should be easily good enough to give the lead a shake.
Regards
Reg

 Comment Written 21-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 21-Oct-2009

Thank you, Reg - this one was fun to write :-) Brooke