Camp
A Fanstory social event goes wrong!22 total reviews
Comment from zeezeewriter
What a great script. You certainly know your genre. You even wrote camera shots.. most excellent. This was a very fun contest. I enjoyed reading the different takes. Good Luck, Zee
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2009
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What a great script. You certainly know your genre. You even wrote camera shots.. most excellent. This was a very fun contest. I enjoyed reading the different takes. Good Luck, Zee
Comment Written 17-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2009
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Thank you Zee :-). I'm told you've posted your entry now, and I'll be reading through the new additions shortly; looking forward to it! As you say, this has been a most amusing contest :-)
Mike
Comment from RapturedHeart
Ha! No one will ever want to go to summer camp after reading this one. Again, I've probably missed a lot of the humour as I never saw Saw, and not familiar at all with Barbara's stories, and have only seen a few poems by Hitch (he must also be a prose writer?)- noticed he seems to be getting brought on a lot of camping trips!
You really have Ray pegged, though.
Thought it was GREAT that you big, tough guys were rescued by the ladies! And, especially Brooke! What an interesting premise, here - Fanstory getting so big it becomes aware and gets greedy - you may be on to something.LOL
Clever twist at the end - guess you're leaving it open for the possibility of a sequel. Excellent.
All the best in the contest,
Heather
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2009
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Ha! No one will ever want to go to summer camp after reading this one. Again, I've probably missed a lot of the humour as I never saw Saw, and not familiar at all with Barbara's stories, and have only seen a few poems by Hitch (he must also be a prose writer?)- noticed he seems to be getting brought on a lot of camping trips!
You really have Ray pegged, though.
Thought it was GREAT that you big, tough guys were rescued by the ladies! And, especially Brooke! What an interesting premise, here - Fanstory getting so big it becomes aware and gets greedy - you may be on to something.LOL
Clever twist at the end - guess you're leaving it open for the possibility of a sequel. Excellent.
All the best in the contest,
Heather
Comment Written 13-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2009
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Thank you Heather :-). As you probably gathered, I had fun writing this one too; it's great trying to capture people you've only encountered by type (though I maintain that this way we get a far truer picture of who people actually are). Granted, if you've not seen Saw then a lot of the analogy won't be obvious, but I tried to get as much generic humour in there as possible. Thank you for the lovely comments :-)
Mike
Comment from K-Patrick
I am still laughing! It was as scary as it was funny. I was worried about what the girls might do with the shotguns, but you can't change the hero type can you.
Leave it to DOMINO to find the Absinthe.
It?s a synthetic humanoid, made from intelligent nano-machines and run by a consciousness downloaded from a computer! ---Just thinking of this means your imagination is stuck in overdrive.
It was Fanstory. It?s got so big, with so many personalities contained within it, that it?s become aware. -- and of coarse ADEWPEARL comes up with the answer. :o) and she's good with a scatter gun.
This was a well needed read. THANK YOU! And to the characters playing their respective parts, thank you for being who you are on FS.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2009
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I am still laughing! It was as scary as it was funny. I was worried about what the girls might do with the shotguns, but you can't change the hero type can you.
Leave it to DOMINO to find the Absinthe.
It?s a synthetic humanoid, made from intelligent nano-machines and run by a consciousness downloaded from a computer! ---Just thinking of this means your imagination is stuck in overdrive.
It was Fanstory. It?s got so big, with so many personalities contained within it, that it?s become aware. -- and of coarse ADEWPEARL comes up with the answer. :o) and she's good with a scatter gun.
This was a well needed read. THANK YOU! And to the characters playing their respective parts, thank you for being who you are on FS.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2009
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Lol, thanks K-Pat :-). I had a great laugh writing this and thankfully all the 'victims' have found it funny! As soon as I thought of doing it as a Saw-style piece, I was off, and it virtually wrote itself after that. Thanks for the great review :-)
Mike
Comment from Reverie
Hey Mike,. this is great! I enjoyed reading it from beginning to end. Lots of humor, great dialogue, suspense, and ripe description. Seems like this was fun to write. Raeally entertaining and well done. Best of luck in the contest! --Dana
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2009
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Hey Mike,. this is great! I enjoyed reading it from beginning to end. Lots of humor, great dialogue, suspense, and ripe description. Seems like this was fun to write. Raeally entertaining and well done. Best of luck in the contest! --Dana
Comment Written 04-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2009
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Thank you Dana :-). You;re right; this was huge fun to write, although I was aware or how esoteric it is, and how many of the jokes would be lost on anyone who didn;t know the characters. Of course, I tried to make it funny regardless :-). Thanks for the review!
Mike
Comment from Tellis
Oh Man this was sooo funny and I loved the way you worked so many wierd things into the story and the other fanstorians too. I've never seen the movie Saw but I get the idea. Please keep writing this story. The more fantastic you make the better.
Tellis
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2009
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Oh Man this was sooo funny and I loved the way you worked so many wierd things into the story and the other fanstorians too. I've never seen the movie Saw but I get the idea. Please keep writing this story. The more fantastic you make the better.
Tellis
Comment Written 04-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2009
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Now there's an idea; an extended script, maybe for a short film, starring various Fanstorians getting themselves into movie-inspired trouble :-). I'd be incredibly esoteric, but a lot of fun!
Thanks Tellis; glad you enjoyed the read :-)
Mike
Comment from jojosug
Yes, I really enjoyed this. It was so male, it made me laugh, even though the 'ladies' joined you much later. This is a very interesting concept and a pleasure to read.
Jo
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2009
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Yes, I really enjoyed this. It was so male, it made me laugh, even though the 'ladies' joined you much later. This is a very interesting concept and a pleasure to read.
Jo
Comment Written 03-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2009
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lol, thanks Jo :-). I had a great time writing this, and thankfully I've not offended anyone!
Mike
Comment from Roisin
Well, I don't think I've laughed so much since I joined Fanstory! Hilarious. Oh gosh, you've done such a brilliant job of this. I had been thinking of entering but my humble offering would be flat as a pancake compared to this. You got me going straight off with this:
Yeah, Mike, it's me. xx
You know, if you hadn't have mentioned his name, I still would have guessed it was Ray, with his little addition of 'xx'. And then when he said:
Typical! I was just convincing myself that my Willy was big enough to get me published!
I could barely see with the tears of laughter. How clever of you to use his beloved Willie in this context. Although I'm sure wizards everywhere may object, haha!
I don't know many of the other characters but thoroughly enjoyed the story nonetheless. I did laugh at the totally out of character picture of Brooke with a gun. Glad she didn't get hurt too. I loved that you made Fanstory the bad guy too. What a wonderful script. Now, when's the movie coming out??
Hugs
Roisin
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2009
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Well, I don't think I've laughed so much since I joined Fanstory! Hilarious. Oh gosh, you've done such a brilliant job of this. I had been thinking of entering but my humble offering would be flat as a pancake compared to this. You got me going straight off with this:
Yeah, Mike, it's me. xx
You know, if you hadn't have mentioned his name, I still would have guessed it was Ray, with his little addition of 'xx'. And then when he said:
Typical! I was just convincing myself that my Willy was big enough to get me published!
I could barely see with the tears of laughter. How clever of you to use his beloved Willie in this context. Although I'm sure wizards everywhere may object, haha!
I don't know many of the other characters but thoroughly enjoyed the story nonetheless. I did laugh at the totally out of character picture of Brooke with a gun. Glad she didn't get hurt too. I loved that you made Fanstory the bad guy too. What a wonderful script. Now, when's the movie coming out??
Hugs
Roisin
Comment Written 03-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2009
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Thanks Roisin :-). I've had one reviewer tell me to removed the "xx" and the "lol" because they aren't speech. Clearly they've somehow managed to not encounter Ray :-)
Hitcher and I are always swapping film references, which is where all the film nods come in. I loved the idea of Brooke blowing things away with a shotgun! A bit of obvious mis-representation to go with the caricatures.
I'm so glad people have enjoyed this, as I had enormous fun writing it. It'll be fun to see what the others come up with.
Mike
Comment from amada
Yes, I sure enjoyed this tirade about some of our famous writers here in fanstory. The story has lots of humor, I chuckled at Domino's rantlings while beein waken up. Great and different piece.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2009
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Yes, I sure enjoyed this tirade about some of our famous writers here in fanstory. The story has lots of humor, I chuckled at Domino's rantlings while beein waken up. Great and different piece.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2009
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Thanks amada :-). This was so much fun to write, and thankfully the people I picked on have all loved it :-)
Mike
Comment from rama devi
Whew. I cannot believe i just read through all of that, but it is amusing when you know the characters. Very clever and witty. entertaining and wittily written without nay spags,
LOL
Dare you see saw?
HA HA HA
Love, rd
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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Whew. I cannot believe i just read through all of that, but it is amusing when you know the characters. Very clever and witty. entertaining and wittily written without nay spags,
LOL
Dare you see saw?
HA HA HA
Love, rd
Comment Written 03-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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This was a lot of fun to write :-). Thank you Rama; glad I inspired a smile :-)
Mike
Comment from babylonia
mike,
this is great and i am not just saying that because i am one of the heroes. LOL the neverending challenge. just when you've managed to get away from one or conquer it then another pops up. really cool. you are right about saw. in the fifth one there is an explanation for why all the others are so campy. it actually has some meat to it. LOL
made me smile. made me giggle. made me laugh out loud. great job.
easy to read and follow. one possible spaggie.
of (change of to or) the other guys at the summer writing camp are having a laugh with us
imagery is excellent. now i have to come up with something ... hmmmm ...
good luck~
love,
barbara
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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mike,
this is great and i am not just saying that because i am one of the heroes. LOL the neverending challenge. just when you've managed to get away from one or conquer it then another pops up. really cool. you are right about saw. in the fifth one there is an explanation for why all the others are so campy. it actually has some meat to it. LOL
made me smile. made me giggle. made me laugh out loud. great job.
easy to read and follow. one possible spaggie.
of (change of to or) the other guys at the summer writing camp are having a laugh with us
imagery is excellent. now i have to come up with something ... hmmmm ...
good luck~
love,
barbara
Comment Written 03-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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thanks for the great review, Barbara, I'm so glad you enjoyed it :-). This was a great laugh to write; as soon as I had the idea of doing the Saw thing, I HAD NO CHOICE, lol :-)
Amusingly, the fifth is the only Saw film I haven't seen; I enjoyed the first immensely, and I thought the third was pretty good, but two and four were just a laugh really. I'm sure I'll get round to it.
I'm sure you'll conjure up something fantastic :-)
Mike
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mike,
i am sure i will. LOL listen to me.
yeah, i totally agree with the different saws. LOL sometimes i wish i could ask the writer or director ... hey, what were you thinking? then it's pretty obvious the only thing they are thinking is how much will i make and can i really afford that new trophy wife. LOL which obviously isn't going to be moi.
:P
love,
barbara
