Dear Lexi
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Variety""Let the little children come unto me." ~ Jesus
18 total reviews
Comment from Nicnac
LOL
This is adorable, Jan.
Funny how those toes always find their way to the mouth, eh? haha.
I liked the way this was worded. The repetition was fun and gave it a playful feel.
Great job. I enjoyed it.
Smiling Nic
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2009
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LOL
This is adorable, Jan.
Funny how those toes always find their way to the mouth, eh? haha.
I liked the way this was worded. The repetition was fun and gave it a playful feel.
Great job. I enjoyed it.
Smiling Nic
Comment Written 08-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2009
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hey, Nic, I wish I could share the picture I got of her today when Cindy & I got back from shopping. She was holding one end of her keyring with one hand and had the end of her foot caught in the other. The look on her face was priceless. Her mom came into the house as I was on the floor LMAO. It was too, too funny. love, jan
Comment from luisestable
This poem does not own so much the sing-song quality that other verses I`v read from you, dedicated to your grndchild, have, but it is well-written. It is suitable for children, but the language is not silly or so baby-like, and by baby-like I mean; lowering the intelligence that children have.
Stanza four strays from the morn of the poem. Each stamza has three lines, four has four lines. This spoils a little bit the structure of the poem, but its effetiveness is not completely distroyed.
I particularly like the first and last stanzas.
Good job.
luis
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reply by the author on 11-Jun-2009
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This poem does not own so much the sing-song quality that other verses I`v read from you, dedicated to your grndchild, have, but it is well-written. It is suitable for children, but the language is not silly or so baby-like, and by baby-like I mean; lowering the intelligence that children have.
Stanza four strays from the morn of the poem. Each stamza has three lines, four has four lines. This spoils a little bit the structure of the poem, but its effetiveness is not completely distroyed.
I particularly like the first and last stanzas.
Good job.
luis
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2009
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luis, I'm not sure what you mean about the fourth verse as they all have three lines as senryus and haikus are required to have:
you found little toes
just where your fingers can reach
irresistible
irresistible
watching you uncover feet
to get to those toes
to get to those toes
socks just have to be removed
New skill for Lexi
new skill for Lexi
leading to delicacy
filet of young toes
filet of young toes
in lieu of fingers and thumbs
ahhh, variety
at any rate, thanks for your comments
Comment from pixiemillie
Love this little poem about your Lexi. The photo of the chubby little hands addressing the chubby little toes, priceless. The repetition of the last line transitioning the next verse pulls this together wonderfully well. First off come the socks, some giggles at finding and fingering the toes. Next milestone- -toes to mouth.
Thank you, this is delightful. No flaws that I can see.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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Love this little poem about your Lexi. The photo of the chubby little hands addressing the chubby little toes, priceless. The repetition of the last line transitioning the next verse pulls this together wonderfully well. First off come the socks, some giggles at finding and fingering the toes. Next milestone- -toes to mouth.
Thank you, this is delightful. No flaws that I can see.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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when I saw the picture, it was too perfect -- thanks for sharing this wonderful review -- love, jan
Comment from Pen&Ink
Hello Rdfrdmom2,
This one is also quite a good read. I liked the way you repeated an ending line by beginning the next verse with it. These stories deal with tiny steps, but they are so important! These will make your memories.
Ray
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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Hello Rdfrdmom2,
This one is also quite a good read. I liked the way you repeated an ending line by beginning the next verse with it. These stories deal with tiny steps, but they are so important! These will make your memories.
Ray
Comment Written 02-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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I've not done that before in this setting but it just seemed to work this time -- thanks -- love, jan
Comment from rmdelta
Jan,
sorry if I've missed a lot of your writing, my friend. Have recently had lots of serious health issues and am still trying to catch up. I deleted over 400 postings without reading them because there was just no way to get to all of them. Probably, some were your and if so, I'm sorry for that.
This was a clever and humorous writing which really does take us directly there, watching Lexi trying to get those dratted socks off. Feet--well, they just don't taste the same with socks on, do they?
Great work, Jan.
Reggie
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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Jan,
sorry if I've missed a lot of your writing, my friend. Have recently had lots of serious health issues and am still trying to catch up. I deleted over 400 postings without reading them because there was just no way to get to all of them. Probably, some were your and if so, I'm sorry for that.
This was a clever and humorous writing which really does take us directly there, watching Lexi trying to get those dratted socks off. Feet--well, they just don't taste the same with socks on, do they?
Great work, Jan.
Reggie
Comment Written 01-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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I'm so sorry you've been ill--my fibromyalgia has been kicking my butt of late so I've been on and off a lot myself -- we'll get caught up together -- glad you are better--love, jan
Comment from fictionwriter
Isn't is so fun when they discover new things. I love to watch the children grow, I missed most of that with my own because I had to work. I guess that's what Grandkids are for. Love it.
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2009
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Isn't is so fun when they discover new things. I love to watch the children grow, I missed most of that with my own because I had to work. I guess that's what Grandkids are for. Love it.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2009
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2009
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yes, I did, too, which is why I'm having so much fun chronicling this for my only child's daughter--thanks. love, jan
Comment from joan marie
I can't wait for the one where she discovers her belly button. The amazement on my friends baby's face was priceless. joan marie
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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I can't wait for the one where she discovers her belly button. The amazement on my friends baby's face was priceless. joan marie
Comment Written 31-May-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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I don't remember that with Cindy -- I'll keep my eyes open for that. love, jan
Comment from Joan E.
Ah, another day shared with Lexi--my, my, she's already four months old. I liked the cascading effect with the last line of each stanza becoming the first of the next--I'm sure the form has a name. The "Filet of young toes" line and the picture you chose are just perfect.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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Ah, another day shared with Lexi--my, my, she's already four months old. I liked the cascading effect with the last line of each stanza becoming the first of the next--I'm sure the form has a name. The "Filet of young toes" line and the picture you chose are just perfect.
Comment Written 31-May-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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if it has a name, I don't know -- it just sort of happened -- I rarely have a plan -- LOL -- love, jan
Comment from Loyd C. Taylor, Sr
Hi Jna. We had the privilage of watching a friend's new baby and your words are so true. This will be a great gift to her in the future. Great read! Loyd
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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Hi Jna. We had the privilage of watching a friend's new baby and your words are so true. This will be a great gift to her in the future. Great read! Loyd
Comment Written 31-May-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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I think her mom is enjoying it too, thanks, Loyd. love, jan
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My pleasure
Comment from Lady & Louis
Too right you got the better of this deal ... school trips! Argh!
Like the image of her working so hard at getting those socks off, Baroness. The yen to eat those toes reminds me of a cat determined to catch its tail!
Love,
Louise
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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Too right you got the better of this deal ... school trips! Argh!
Like the image of her working so hard at getting those socks off, Baroness. The yen to eat those toes reminds me of a cat determined to catch its tail!
Love,
Louise
Comment Written 31-May-2009
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2009
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I spent 19 years of going on school trips plus a few extra with Cindy -- it's okay if I don't take any others -- except with Lexi, of course. LOL -- love, jan
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My view of school trips is jaundiced by having to deal with school groups when I worked at the Museum, and seeing them on the trains. Little kids are one thing, but teenagers ... !
