Quaterns: Observations on Life
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "I Cast a Bottle in the Sea"Assorted Reflections
82 total reviews
Comment from RG Hamilton
Brilliant quatrain! This one really moved me. Alas, my sixes are squandered. I am so glad that I got to read this. This was spiritual for me. Way to paint with words, Brooke. You rock!
Rob
reply by the author on 04-May-2009
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Brilliant quatrain! This one really moved me. Alas, my sixes are squandered. I am so glad that I got to read this. This was spiritual for me. Way to paint with words, Brooke. You rock!
Rob
Comment Written 03-May-2009
reply by the author on 04-May-2009
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Well, you squanderer, I just don't know what to say to that! LOL Thanks so much, Brooke
Comment from Gaye Hemsley
Hi Brooke Choosen artwork couldn't have been better for you poem, which has lots of movement and the repetition of the same line is interesting. Is this the idea of a quatern poem. Cheers Gaye
reply by the author on 03-May-2009
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Hi Brooke Choosen artwork couldn't have been better for you poem, which has lots of movement and the repetition of the same line is interesting. Is this the idea of a quatern poem. Cheers Gaye
Comment Written 03-May-2009
reply by the author on 03-May-2009
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Yes, the movement of that line from first to second to third to fourth line is the defining characteristic of the quatern. Thanks so much, Brooke :-)
Comment from Arkine
Wouldn't it be nice if we could do this with all our troubles? A bottle in the sea is often seen as a desperate cry for help, but how many of us have considered doing that? Maybe not our troubles but just a simple "Hi". And people across seas think the same thing, I wonder why our differences keep us appart when the ocean can't?
reply by the author on 02-May-2009
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Wouldn't it be nice if we could do this with all our troubles? A bottle in the sea is often seen as a desperate cry for help, but how many of us have considered doing that? Maybe not our troubles but just a simple "Hi". And people across seas think the same thing, I wonder why our differences keep us appart when the ocean can't?
Comment Written 02-May-2009
reply by the author on 02-May-2009
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You are so right - if we were all just penpals, we'd think far longer about shooting each other and sending missiles into the air. Thanks so much, Brooke
Comment from Phil Kitom
I found this bottle on the shore, And read a note in ink and pen. I'll place another inside once more, and send it back to them again.
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I received this message and it was so well balanced with a great verse and cadence that it flowed so freely. Well Done
reply by the author on 02-May-2009
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I found this bottle on the shore, And read a note in ink and pen. I'll place another inside once more, and send it back to them again.
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I received this message and it was so well balanced with a great verse and cadence that it flowed so freely. Well Done
Comment Written 02-May-2009
reply by the author on 02-May-2009
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Phil, thanks so much for your lovely rhyming response :-) Brooke
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it was richly deserved Brooke.
Comment from mstad55
From Sea to shining Sea. Traveling to destinations unknown in a bottle. I suppose that's one way to save the cost of a cruise or plane ticket. Wouldn't it be great to bounce around from Island to Island and see who would come to the rescue and open the bottle. Then throw you back for your next destination. Great Poem. Mike
reply by the author on 02-May-2009
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From Sea to shining Sea. Traveling to destinations unknown in a bottle. I suppose that's one way to save the cost of a cruise or plane ticket. Wouldn't it be great to bounce around from Island to Island and see who would come to the rescue and open the bottle. Then throw you back for your next destination. Great Poem. Mike
Comment Written 02-May-2009
reply by the author on 02-May-2009
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Mike, I like your idea of the bottle relay. :-) And if anyone wants to buy me the round the world cruise ticket, I'll smash the damn bottle without a second thought! LOL Thanks, Brooke
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Find two tickets and I'll carry your baggage.
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any clues on where to look???
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I wouldn't start on Craigs List, you might be answering an add for illegal activities. Maybe call the cruise line and tell them you're a big gambler and that if they were to give you a free ticket, you would make it worth their while in the on board casino's. If you're going to tell a lie, it might as well be a good one.
Comment from Helen Tan
Again the theme of casting a bottle with outwards movement of the bottle to sea is well portrayed in this quatern. I enjoyed the descriptions and flow.
and hoped my vessel would be bound
to lands alive with mystery.
This is ironic. I think for the people who finds your bottle or any other bottles with a message, their first thought would be that the message came from some mysterious, exotic island. Maybe it's just me.
I love the last 2 verses, they hold romantic thoughts. To cast our hopes out to sea. The next time I do my beach cleaning I will look out for your bottle. I hope you didn't put an address in your message - the government here will probably fine you! I hope you caught the pun.
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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Again the theme of casting a bottle with outwards movement of the bottle to sea is well portrayed in this quatern. I enjoyed the descriptions and flow.
and hoped my vessel would be bound
to lands alive with mystery.
This is ironic. I think for the people who finds your bottle or any other bottles with a message, their first thought would be that the message came from some mysterious, exotic island. Maybe it's just me.
I love the last 2 verses, they hold romantic thoughts. To cast our hopes out to sea. The next time I do my beach cleaning I will look out for your bottle. I hope you didn't put an address in your message - the government here will probably fine you! I hope you caught the pun.
Comment Written 01-May-2009
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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I think you're right about people in both directions of the throw assuming the other end of its journey is more exotic :-)
Thanks so much, Brooke :-)
Comment from Comanche
I really like the refrain of the line I cast a bottle in the sea... It's hypnotic and sedate and hopeful and rueful all at once... The self-reliance of the persona is also a nice touch....
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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I really like the refrain of the line I cast a bottle in the sea... It's hypnotic and sedate and hopeful and rueful all at once... The self-reliance of the persona is also a nice touch....
Comment Written 01-May-2009
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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Thank you for your thoughtful review, Brooke
Comment from Just2Write
Somes we do feel that we are stranded on a deserted island, and cast our messages of hope into the sea. We wish for someone to find them and send their messages back to us. Nicely said, I enjoyed this well written quatern.
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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Somes we do feel that we are stranded on a deserted island, and cast our messages of hope into the sea. We wish for someone to find them and send their messages back to us. Nicely said, I enjoyed this well written quatern.
Comment Written 01-May-2009
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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Thank you - I, as always, appreciate your reviews and comments :-) Brooke
Comment from Oatmeal
adewpearl,
This was a nice poem. There was only one problem. A bottle will not float. It cannot ride the waves. Everything else was fine. The first stanza just threw me for a loop.
There was no SPAG.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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adewpearl,
This was a nice poem. There was only one problem. A bottle will not float. It cannot ride the waves. Everything else was fine. The first stanza just threw me for a loop.
There was no SPAG.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
Comment Written 01-May-2009
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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The popular culture concept of sending a message in a bottle is centuries old - I honestly did not think anyone would approach this poem using scientific principles. Thanks so much, Brooke
Comment from stormwolf2
Nice poem full of mystique. I used to look for bottles on the beach when I was younger, hoping to find a message inside of it...Never did!
Nice flow with good rhyme and rhythm.
Best wishes,
Malcolm
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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Nice poem full of mystique. I used to look for bottles on the beach when I was younger, hoping to find a message inside of it...Never did!
Nice flow with good rhyme and rhythm.
Best wishes,
Malcolm
Comment Written 30-Apr-2009
reply by the author on 01-May-2009
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Malcolm, thank you for your thoughtful comments. Happy May Day. Brooke :-)
