The Listener
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "The Listening Post"Telepathy makes business trust easy. Or should.
5 total reviews
Comment from WRITER1
That's another good chapter for your book, I liked the interaction of the people. Judy is the perfect dippy headed little twit.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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That's another good chapter for your book, I liked the interaction of the people. Judy is the perfect dippy headed little twit.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2009
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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Thank you. I'm not sure I wrote her that way to start, but if the dippy cap fits her dippy head, she'll have to lump it..
Comment from Adri7enne
Starting to get the characters straight. And that's a feat when you're trying to read 5-6 books, all at the same time. Interesting, different kind of story. I'm still following your story line. Strong narrative voice, good dialogue. Am still a fan,
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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Starting to get the characters straight. And that's a feat when you're trying to read 5-6 books, all at the same time. Interesting, different kind of story. I'm still following your story line. Strong narrative voice, good dialogue. Am still a fan,
Comment Written 02-Mar-2009
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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Thank you. I'm flattered
Comment from dmjones
A good chapter. A lot of natural dialogue that makes it easy to read and enjoy. I'm sure I read another chapter because the characters sound familier.
I believe you need to make this two sentences or use a semi colon or dash instead of a comma. "Ted had been right, it was a nice day."
For a moment(,) it looked
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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A good chapter. A lot of natural dialogue that makes it easy to read and enjoy. I'm sure I read another chapter because the characters sound familier.
I believe you need to make this two sentences or use a semi colon or dash instead of a comma. "Ted had been right, it was a nice day."
For a moment(,) it looked
Comment Written 02-Mar-2009
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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Thank you for your review and comments. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from despiser
Hi snodlander
Good choice of words. I had some difficulty following the story and could not find the significance of laura having tea with ted the killer. Perhaps you need to tie up the end a little. Otherwise, you have a natural flow to your style that will help you if combined with more clarity.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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Hi snodlander
Good choice of words. I had some difficulty following the story and could not find the significance of laura having tea with ted the killer. Perhaps you need to tie up the end a little. Otherwise, you have a natural flow to your style that will help you if combined with more clarity.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2009
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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Thank you. This is chapter 13, so a fair amount has happened. Ted isn't the killer she had tea with. Thanks for your hensty and your comments
Comment from tkmartin
I think this chapter gives us good insight into Laura as a person. Flowed beautifully as always.
One edit for you:
Judy was grinning like (a) lotto winner
cheers
TK
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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I think this chapter gives us good insight into Laura as a person. Flowed beautifully as always.
One edit for you:
Judy was grinning like (a) lotto winner
cheers
TK
Comment Written 02-Mar-2009
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2009
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Oops, thanks for that. Thanks for the encouragement
