The First Snowfall
How a Fairy with Faith caused the First Snowfall89 total reviews
Comment from Marathonwriter
hi Brooke,
Once again I have sqandered all of my 6's before I looked at your poetry! This is truely a beautiful read. I love how you brought a fairy story complete with characters to explain the wonders of winter. Is there a bottom to your vast imagination?
Love,
Chris
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2008
hi Brooke,
Once again I have sqandered all of my 6's before I looked at your poetry! This is truely a beautiful read. I love how you brought a fairy story complete with characters to explain the wonders of winter. Is there a bottom to your vast imagination?
Love,
Chris
Comment Written 25-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2008
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Well, if there is a bottom, I hope I haven't reached it yet!
Thanks so much, Brooke :-)
Comment from Allezw2
Lady adewpearl,
A charming little tale. One to enhance the wonder after that first snowfall. The pristine mantle lain over most of anything on the ground, gives a new dimension to any landscape.
To those who can enjoy the esthetics, wonderful indeed. To those who must acknowledge it as an impediment, my best wishes.
Fantasist
For your consideration:
- and [feel an] overpow'ring [sense] of gall.
Perhaps:
- and [taste of] overpow'ring [bitter] gall.
- Before the Queen of Fairyland [she bowed]
Perhaps:
- [To] the Queen of Fairyland she [did bow]
- This winter wonderland from gloom had grown
Perhaps:
- A wonderland from gloom to light had grown
- Icicles glisten [when] the wind has blown
Perhaps:
- Icicles glisten [where] the wind has blown
- and hang from branches when they bear no leaf.
Perhaps:
- [They] hang from [bare] branches that bear no leaf.
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2008
Lady adewpearl,
A charming little tale. One to enhance the wonder after that first snowfall. The pristine mantle lain over most of anything on the ground, gives a new dimension to any landscape.
To those who can enjoy the esthetics, wonderful indeed. To those who must acknowledge it as an impediment, my best wishes.
Fantasist
For your consideration:
- and [feel an] overpow'ring [sense] of gall.
Perhaps:
- and [taste of] overpow'ring [bitter] gall.
- Before the Queen of Fairyland [she bowed]
Perhaps:
- [To] the Queen of Fairyland she [did bow]
- This winter wonderland from gloom had grown
Perhaps:
- A wonderland from gloom to light had grown
- Icicles glisten [when] the wind has blown
Perhaps:
- Icicles glisten [where] the wind has blown
- and hang from branches when they bear no leaf.
Perhaps:
- [They] hang from [bare] branches that bear no leaf.
Comment Written 25-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2008
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thank you so much for your thoughtful input and you kind review, Brooke
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The pleasure was mine.
Comment from jmyron
As usual, you're imagry is crisp, and in this case very cool. True to the fairy world that you are building, it has a sense of - wonder. . .
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2008
As usual, you're imagry is crisp, and in this case very cool. True to the fairy world that you are building, it has a sense of - wonder. . .
Comment Written 24-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2008
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Thank you so much, Brooke
Comment from redrider6612
What a beautiful, fanciful 'explanation' of a winter wonderland. You have quite an imagination. Nice flow and form, natural rhymes, overall a very enjoyable poem. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2008
What a beautiful, fanciful 'explanation' of a winter wonderland. You have quite an imagination. Nice flow and form, natural rhymes, overall a very enjoyable poem. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 24-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2008
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thanks so much for your positive review, Brooke
Comment from rama devi
Oh, now charming and delightful!~
Love this. So imaginative and splendid.
Well presented.
I have only praises for it, no nits.
Nicely vivid and so well worded:
Her sparkling fairy dust chilled by the cold
formed into flakes of six-fold symmetry.
Their crystal whiteness one could not behold
without a sense of marveled mystery.
Each fern-like flake was peerlessly unique,
with radiating patterns nonpareil,
until they landed on the ground so deep
they formed a dazzling mantle where they fell.
Favorite lines:Each fern-like flake was peerlessly unique,
with radiating patterns nonpareil,
Simply superb,
Warm Regards,
rama devi
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
Oh, now charming and delightful!~
Love this. So imaginative and splendid.
Well presented.
I have only praises for it, no nits.
Nicely vivid and so well worded:
Her sparkling fairy dust chilled by the cold
formed into flakes of six-fold symmetry.
Their crystal whiteness one could not behold
without a sense of marveled mystery.
Each fern-like flake was peerlessly unique,
with radiating patterns nonpareil,
until they landed on the ground so deep
they formed a dazzling mantle where they fell.
Favorite lines:Each fern-like flake was peerlessly unique,
with radiating patterns nonpareil,
Simply superb,
Warm Regards,
rama devi
Comment Written 24-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
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rama devi - you've singled out one of the lines I was most pleased with after writing it! I actually googled snowflakes and read sites about scientists who categorize all the flake types in order to come up with that description :-) thanks, Brooke
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Happy Christmas to you deAr Brooke!~
Comment from Juleeann
Very moving and appropriate for my area of the world. We've had more snow before Christmas than the past 43 years. Your words seemed to hit home! Carry on and God bless,
Juleeann
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
Very moving and appropriate for my area of the world. We've had more snow before Christmas than the past 43 years. Your words seemed to hit home! Carry on and God bless,
Juleeann
Comment Written 24-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
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Juleeann, we just keep getting more and more rain, including tonight, pouring and gray - not a holiday kind of weather. Thanks so much for your lovely review, Brooke
Comment from c_lucas
Very well written with a a very unique rhyming scheme making for a very smooth read. It has very good imagery and descriptive scheme.
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
Very well written with a a very unique rhyming scheme making for a very smooth read. It has very good imagery and descriptive scheme.
Comment Written 24-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
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Charlie, thank you! Brooke
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You're welocme, Brooke. Charllie
Comment from Aussie
I loved your beautiful, fanciful, fairy tale. You really have put quite some thought into a story/poem. Whilst you post on FS we will never be without fairies! Thanks for sharing your love of nature.
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
I loved your beautiful, fanciful, fairy tale. You really have put quite some thought into a story/poem. Whilst you post on FS we will never be without fairies! Thanks for sharing your love of nature.
Comment Written 24-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
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I'm so glad you like the legend I made up for my daughter. Thank you so much, Brooke
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Brooke a nice quatrain poem How did you know it's like this in Vermont-
Loved the story about the Fairy who had faith
thank you for sharing your poetic thoughts
Gert
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
Hello Brooke a nice quatrain poem How did you know it's like this in Vermont-
Loved the story about the Fairy who had faith
thank you for sharing your poetic thoughts
Gert
Comment Written 24-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
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Vermont is quite close to Northampton, MA where I went to college - some of my professors even lived in VT, and my husband and I traveled to VT several times - I love the Bennington area. We also went grave rubbing a couple times in VT, which has fantastic old cemeteries. My poem could very well take place in VT!! Thanks, Brooke
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Hello Brooke, so nice to chat with somone who is famalir with Vermont
smiles
Gert
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Bennington College was one of the colleges I applied to because Bernard Malamud taught there at the time, but I ended up going to Smith - I've always had a soft spot in my heart for your gorgeous state and for Western MA.
Comment from Loyd C. Taylor, Sr
Hello again there poet friend. Oh, how this poem made me shiver. It was very delightful and sounds like a true fairy tell of old. Good work and good luck. Loyd
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
Hello again there poet friend. Oh, how this poem made me shiver. It was very delightful and sounds like a true fairy tell of old. Good work and good luck. Loyd
Comment Written 24-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2008
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Loyd, thank you for enjoying the legend I created - you are most kind, Brooke
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Merry CHRISTmas on the beautiful morning!
You are very welcome poet. poetfriendloyd