Flags Of Prayer
A haiku! A painted desire too!11 total reviews
Comment from nora arjuna
Hi there Mike. This is a wonderful haiku. I especially like the third line - around you they bound - a complete and perfect conclusion. Only that I thought haiku shouldn't have punctuations?
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2008
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Hi there Mike. This is a wonderful haiku. I especially like the third line - around you they bound - a complete and perfect conclusion. Only that I thought haiku shouldn't have punctuations?
Comment Written 01-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2008
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I am not technically proficient in the form, but I say no rules against it and felt that from my poem, punctuation was the best for this. This might be my opener for, "My Little Book of Prayers." Not really prayers at all but the various prayer methods of various religions that predominate though out the world. To me, "God," is a non descript generic term and I feel that the only prayer that is acceptable to Him is one that is from the heart, not selfish, honest and apealing. So why this minagerie of prayer methods. I think that He understands that we need various meditations to suit our needs to keep Him in our hearts. To our benifit. That is why I am so accepting of different religions. It just strikes me that He actually had thoughts of what would be best for us. At that time in our history, we were all fairly isolated from each other.
I thank you so much for your approval and complients in this review. Have a great week ahead.
With love, from Mike K too.
Comment from Dawn of Tomorrow
I think you have something worthy of giving thought to here. Haiku are very restrictive in a sense part of that restriction limits it from rhyme which in that short of a space you probably don't want it to as it would somehow take away from the image you could create. You have abound/around and bound all right there. You don't have to use bound in that last line, you could use prance or something that gives the same image you are trying to convey and make for a stronger read, in my mind's eye anyway. I'm no haiku expert that's for sure but I think it would be stronger for the contest judges if you changed that last line just a tad.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2008
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I think you have something worthy of giving thought to here. Haiku are very restrictive in a sense part of that restriction limits it from rhyme which in that short of a space you probably don't want it to as it would somehow take away from the image you could create. You have abound/around and bound all right there. You don't have to use bound in that last line, you could use prance or something that gives the same image you are trying to convey and make for a stronger read, in my mind's eye anyway. I'm no haiku expert that's for sure but I think it would be stronger for the contest judges if you changed that last line just a tad.
Comment Written 01-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2008
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My regrets about this review. In my life, I tend to get it figured out and God has a way of grabbing me by the nap of my head and saying, "Oh Yea? Guess again?" The same holds true of poetry.
Believe me all of your reasons for questioning this Haiku came to mind. But I had to decide on this one. It says exactly what this Hiaku intends to create. Actually I thought of using the prayer flags for another poem, yet this contest presented itself. The image that sticks in my mind came from a documentry on Hillary's first Everest expedition. The treck to the mountian was just as much portraid and I saw the sight of the prayer flags. This not only amazed me, but him as well and from my knowledge, a glimps of life to the people that led him there. That was what I wanted to convey. I can not change the last line and have thought of doing so. The reason is this poem is coyingly, a "Tickey Dick," one. If instead of the flags, you think of the prayers instead of the flags, you then have a Senyru.
Considering the contest, I can not consider what the judges think. If I did, then in my mind and spirit, I haven't done my best. With photography I have been both. I have won photography contests and whether participant or judge, I have walked away saying that I have done my best. What is acceptable is left to them. To be honest with one I recieved failing grades for Photo school. Though the teachers felt that I had the most technically acomplished work. The people that one were the last minute procrastinators who basically stuck a mirror in from of themselves and clicked the picture. The reason was that that contest was judged by photojournalists. To them, what I did fell within thier everyday. But they never learned the basics of portrature, which is actually, much easier.
I do appreciate your comments and thank you for taking the time to express your opinion.
Comment from justmade
I like the depth of this poem. Lovely haiku Mike.
What I love the most about it is the clear picture it painted in my mind.
Much love,
Justmade.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2008
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I like the depth of this poem. Lovely haiku Mike.
What I love the most about it is the clear picture it painted in my mind.
Much love,
Justmade.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2008
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2008
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Thank you very much for your compliments and this review. I was thinking about prayer flags for another poem and this contest just popped up. With my imagery fresh, I really thought it would be great to convey it and the Haiku form really lent itself.
Take care, Mike
Comment from Twomoon
Mike, I enjoyed this very much, a very powerful verse with so few words, these can sometimes, like quotes be more powerful if done correctly and thought out...I love the thought..love you painted it..very nice, much love twomoon...hey..............thanks........for the teaaaaaaaa!!!
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2008
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Mike, I enjoyed this very much, a very powerful verse with so few words, these can sometimes, like quotes be more powerful if done correctly and thought out...I love the thought..love you painted it..very nice, much love twomoon...hey..............thanks........for the teaaaaaaaa!!!
Comment Written 30-Nov-2008
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2008
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I actually have another more romantic posts about prayer flags, that I will include a photograph on. It ballooned into a concept of, "My Little Prayer Book." Not a collection of prayers, but using various methods of prayers to convey my thoughts and ideas, in a sense honoring all religions. The Haiku contest just popped up and I had that image in my mind. I admit that there is a bit of michieviousness about this Haiku. In the last last line, if you think about the prayers instead of the flags themselves, it become a Senyru! I call it a Tricky Dick poem.
I thank you so much for stiopping by and not only enjoying this one, but the compliments and the review itself.
Much love, Mike
Oh, I noticed that I didn't have too many reviewers on my prior post. Those few reviews were trips. lol
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I do not think I got there yet!! smile...well thanks Mike, and I love your title! lol..have a nice day, hugs two
Comment from Seraphim Delphinium
Mike, I adore this haiku. It seems like your clear "nature voice" is writing. I know how you love mountains and it shows in this poem.
As an aside, thank you so much for the pictures. They were grand. I'm still trying to figure out how to print them though. Sorry I shook the camera on you and Lea. All of your shots were excellent though. I love the one of Ruby. My favorite is the moon over the truck. If you haven't already, you should join FanArt here and post that there. I know it will get incredible reviews.
So back to your poem. It is superb!
Hugs, Sara ~
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2008
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Mike, I adore this haiku. It seems like your clear "nature voice" is writing. I know how you love mountains and it shows in this poem.
As an aside, thank you so much for the pictures. They were grand. I'm still trying to figure out how to print them though. Sorry I shook the camera on you and Lea. All of your shots were excellent though. I love the one of Ruby. My favorite is the moon over the truck. If you haven't already, you should join FanArt here and post that there. I know it will get incredible reviews.
So back to your poem. It is superb!
Hugs, Sara ~
Comment Written 30-Nov-2008
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2008
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Well, there are more. I would try to right click on them and there should be a way to download the complet file. Then you can put them on a CD or send them to a photofinisher. Warning, this week there are more to come, time appears to be my biggest advesary. I had to take a picture of my arranged date! I will never forget the looks on your and Lea Ann's face when I said, if only I could get the sounds out of women like she makes. SD was not only a blast, but cherished.
Thank you so much for your compliments and this review.
Comment from Moira's Amethyst
I've never seen a haiku with rhyme. It just doesn't work here but that's all you and I'm sure you'll do well. I have no reason to deduct. Please, take care.
Poetry's Protege
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2008
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I've never seen a haiku with rhyme. It just doesn't work here but that's all you and I'm sure you'll do well. I have no reason to deduct. Please, take care.
Poetry's Protege
Comment Written 30-Nov-2008
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2008
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You rarely comment on my works, but when you do, I know that there was something that captured you about it. In a sense, I use it to help judge the quality.
The funny thing about your review is that for the same reason, this poem was down graded for it as I was accused of using the same work twice. What irks me is when that is leveled, it occurs on words that I went to the dictionary over. Everytime! The rhyme was unintention and I explored other words, but non conveyed the exact image that I wanted to and felt it wasn't a good idea to sacrifice that image.
I regret that I don't have too much time to devote to study, but what makes me proud of this one is that if you think of the prayers instead of the flags, you have a Senyru. I call it a Tricky Dick poem. I have another one planned that is a rhyming poem, called, "Love Has No Rhyme." That one will most likely take a year to create.
"Flags of Prayer," came up spontainiously as I was thinking about prayer flags for use with another poem and book concept, "My little Book Of Prayers." Not actual prayers, but using mention various prayer methods to convey my ideas and feelings.
I thank you very much for the compliments and this review.
Please, take care and have a great week ahead, too. Mike
I just have to mention that the greatest thing about this site is that there is always a member out there that wishes me well. It really keeps me going. God bless!
Comment from RJ
A well written haiku poem. In just a few words the visulization of flags flowing is there. Good luck in the contest. RJ
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2008
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A well written haiku poem. In just a few words the visulization of flags flowing is there. Good luck in the contest. RJ
Comment Written 29-Nov-2008
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2008
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Wow! I thank you very much for your encouragement, blessings and the compliments that are contained in this review. Mike
Comment from MJMuraco
I know that you are limited with Haiku but the word bound was in there twice in three lines. I liked your message though.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
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reply by the author on 29-Nov-2008
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I know that you are limited with Haiku but the word bound was in there twice in three lines. I liked your message though.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2008
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2008
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I disagree, the first use is abound. I purposely used the would bound on the latter to denote the motion. I do thank you for taking the time to review this. I don't want to change that word as, if you think of prayers instead of the flags, it become Senyru like. I call it a tricky dick poem. lol No hard feelings! Mike
Comment from Helen Tan
This is like a scene which I experienced in Nepal where they hang up small pieces of cloth to convey their prayers and wishes to the Gods.
I'm glad that you did not use a picture to accompany your haiku, I find it distracting. Well done, I still managed to get a complete mental picture.
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2008
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This is like a scene which I experienced in Nepal where they hang up small pieces of cloth to convey their prayers and wishes to the Gods.
I'm glad that you did not use a picture to accompany your haiku, I find it distracting. Well done, I still managed to get a complete mental picture.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2008
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2008
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Well, God bless you, I am very envious as I wished that I had the ability to visit there and climb. I'm afraid that age and resources are catching up to me.
I do have a photograph, but that is intened for another poem called, "My Prayer Flag." I thought it would be best for the contest to keep this as it was stated. The next poem on the subject will have notes and a photo.
I thank you very much for sharing your experience, the compliments and this review. I call this one a Trickey Dick poem as if in the last line you think of the prayers, it then becomes a Senyru.
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I went to Nepal before they had the royal shooting case. Having travelled a fair bit, I still maintain that the mountains in Nepal are amazing. The skies are so clear and it felt as if the Heavens had descended upon me when I looked up at the skies from the mountain side.
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Absolutely, most of what I know and came to admire came from the documentary on Hillar's expedition. It was amazingly complete and though in Black and White, it still was a color experience. The imensity, including the sounds, was incrediable to me. With mountainous regions, each one is so unique. Thanks!
Have a great week ahead, Mike
Comment from LadyMary
Good imagery in this very concise Haiku format. The fact that the flags "abound" allows the visualization of flags as far as the eye can see. Well done. LadyMary
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2008
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Good imagery in this very concise Haiku format. The fact that the flags "abound" allows the visualization of flags as far as the eye can see. Well done. LadyMary
Comment Written 29-Nov-2008
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2008
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This was actually note my prayer flag poem as I thought about a small book not containing prayers specifically, but thoughts using the various forms of praying. That is a wonderful visualization as it is common for this to occur. The photograph that I have will display the flags from one mountain top, going to another.
I thank you very much for the compliments and this review. I call this one a Tricky Dick poem as if in the last line you think of the prayers, it then becomes a Senyru.
