Do No Harm
For anyone who has contemplated self-harm43 total reviews
Comment from rama devi
Bravo. This is a powerfully effective poem and I do think it would touch someone who is in such a wretched state as to consider self harm. It is well written and clearly has the inspiration of good intentions that lend power to the pen.
Good artwork choice and well presented without any flaws.
Only one tiny typo in the comments, in the last sentence, the word 'out' has one too many 'o's.
Warm Regards,
rama devi
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2008
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Bravo. This is a powerfully effective poem and I do think it would touch someone who is in such a wretched state as to consider self harm. It is well written and clearly has the inspiration of good intentions that lend power to the pen.
Good artwork choice and well presented without any flaws.
Only one tiny typo in the comments, in the last sentence, the word 'out' has one too many 'o's.
Warm Regards,
rama devi
Comment Written 26-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2008
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thanks, rama devi. I'd been wanting to do a piece on this ever since a friend of mind committed suicide in May but hadn't been able to do so until this contest. love, jan
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I am sorry for your loss. It must have been quite painful for everyone who knew your friend. May that person soon find peace. It may be difficult to revover from the shock of that incident. HUGS
Warm Regards,
rama devi
Comment from Norzah
A pursuasive and convincing poem to dissuade suicide-prone individuals from pursuing that line of thought and turn his or her attention to something more worthwhile and meaningful. At least talk to someone first - but certainly not someone who'd challenge your courage to do it, even as a prank. Obviously it's not easy to tell someone you don't know: 'Hey, I plan to commit suicide.' The question is how to get the right ear to listen. The poem satisfies the contest requirement but leaves that issue open.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2008
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A pursuasive and convincing poem to dissuade suicide-prone individuals from pursuing that line of thought and turn his or her attention to something more worthwhile and meaningful. At least talk to someone first - but certainly not someone who'd challenge your courage to do it, even as a prank. Obviously it's not easy to tell someone you don't know: 'Hey, I plan to commit suicide.' The question is how to get the right ear to listen. The poem satisfies the contest requirement but leaves that issue open.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2008
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thanks, Norzah. You are correct in that some people tend to think the way to handle this is to challenge the person to do it and get it over with. Wish I knew how to always get the right ear to listen or to have the person chose to tell always as I'd have several close friends still with me today. love, jan
Comment from fayesh
Nicely done verse. The topic is tragic, but you managed to be removed from emotional involvement to produce a poem that is didactic in nature.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2008
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Nicely done verse. The topic is tragic, but you managed to be removed from emotional involvement to produce a poem that is didactic in nature.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2008
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thanks, fayesh.
Comment from storymama
Your poem is beautifully written. I pray it touches people's hearts when they need it the most. The problem is, a lot of the time when someone is contemplating ending it all they aren't even sure if people would care or be relieved, especially if those people remind them of what a failure and disappointment they are. Seeking help is sound advice. God bless you.
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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Your poem is beautifully written. I pray it touches people's hearts when they need it the most. The problem is, a lot of the time when someone is contemplating ending it all they aren't even sure if people would care or be relieved, especially if those people remind them of what a failure and disappointment they are. Seeking help is sound advice. God bless you.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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you are right, storymama. that's even been proven on this site by some people's reaction to poems about possible suicide attempts. love, jan
Comment from jeslaf
Angel hearts WOULD shatter, as would many earthly ones. I love this line. What a great message piece this is, and I also like the "final mile" warning to remember the trail left behind such an act. Well done!
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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Angel hearts WOULD shatter, as would many earthly ones. I love this line. What a great message piece this is, and I also like the "final mile" warning to remember the trail left behind such an act. Well done!
Comment Written 25-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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thanks, jeslaf. Ever since someone close to me committed suicide in May, I've wanted to write a piece but had not been able to do so. Then when I saw these words, I knew the opportunity had presented itself. love, jan
Comment from sldream
I thought your double, double, single rhyme scheme was grand. It definitely made your poem more impactful. This poem is a great action plan even to those who are thinking of commiting suicide. It tells them why they should not do it, then it tells them how to handle their pain. I think it's brilliant and job well done. I have a couple friends who have recently tried to kill themselves, one who spent five days in ICU. I will definitely share this poem with them. Thank you for writing and sharing.
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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I thought your double, double, single rhyme scheme was grand. It definitely made your poem more impactful. This poem is a great action plan even to those who are thinking of commiting suicide. It tells them why they should not do it, then it tells them how to handle their pain. I think it's brilliant and job well done. I have a couple friends who have recently tried to kill themselves, one who spent five days in ICU. I will definitely share this poem with them. Thank you for writing and sharing.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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thanks, sldream. Godspeed to your friends and you. love, jan
Comment from ExperiencingLiphe
Almost 3 years. I don't know what I'm going to do yet but for some reason I still feel compelled to do something to celebrate or something. Anyways good luck in the contest
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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Almost 3 years. I don't know what I'm going to do yet but for some reason I still feel compelled to do something to celebrate or something. Anyways good luck in the contest
Comment Written 25-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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you should do something to celebrate, my young friend. It's an important anniversary. love, jan
Comment from amadan01
Very good use of the required words to illustrate a sensitive and difficult subject. It is so hard to understand when this happens and so much justification, judging, bewilderment, confusion, grief and pain happens, sometimes in combinations of several things at once. I really like how you have laid this out. Best of luck to you in the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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Very good use of the required words to illustrate a sensitive and difficult subject. It is so hard to understand when this happens and so much justification, judging, bewilderment, confusion, grief and pain happens, sometimes in combinations of several things at once. I really like how you have laid this out. Best of luck to you in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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thanks, amadan01. love, jan
Comment from wierdgrace
I hope you send this to every outreach place there is. I well have my son read it. He was on meth for a few years, and had the hardest time, and death was his way out. We did our best and he is still here. I will print this for him. Structure was easy to read, images were very strong, excellent point of view. No revisions.
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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I hope you send this to every outreach place there is. I well have my son read it. He was on meth for a few years, and had the hardest time, and death was his way out. We did our best and he is still here. I will print this for him. Structure was easy to read, images were very strong, excellent point of view. No revisions.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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thanks, wierdgrace. I'm glad your son is still here. Feel free to share it as you will. Godspeed to your family. love, jan
Comment from nora arjuna
Hello Jan. You adressed the emotions concerning the subject of suicide well here in your poem. It was well-written with finely chosen words. I wish you all the best in the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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Hello Jan. You adressed the emotions concerning the subject of suicide well here in your poem. It was well-written with finely chosen words. I wish you all the best in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2008
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thanks, arjuna. It's one of those issues driving me a little batty just now. love, jan
