No S.A.S.E.
What we put out, doesn't always come back.9 total reviews
Comment from Twomoon
Mike, this is so beautifully written, and somewhat true. however I do believe that always we get something back, if not just a brush of air, a flash of eyes that glit..sometimes we are not ready or not looking. The return is always there, maybe not in the way we expected or hoped, but something always comes back around! smile, but I love your voice always and your beautiful thoughts, much love twomoon, have a grand day!
reply by the author on 05-May-2008
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Mike, this is so beautifully written, and somewhat true. however I do believe that always we get something back, if not just a brush of air, a flash of eyes that glit..sometimes we are not ready or not looking. The return is always there, maybe not in the way we expected or hoped, but something always comes back around! smile, but I love your voice always and your beautiful thoughts, much love twomoon, have a grand day!
Comment Written 04-May-2008
reply by the author on 05-May-2008
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Sadly that has been so in my life, but I can not change me because I truely feel that it is the way things should be. It makes for some very good poetry. lol Thank you very much for your compliments and this review, I miss that brand of poetry that you put out, Two. Mike
Comment from bard owl
There is an old African saying, "Plant a tree with no expectation of ever sitting it it's shade." Doing something without looking for a return reveals a truly loving heart. Your poem says this with warmth. It is such a heartwarming feeling to know that you are doing the right thing. Everyone should read this poem and think about the wise words. Excellent. Blessings, Linda
reply by the author on 03-May-2008
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There is an old African saying, "Plant a tree with no expectation of ever sitting it it's shade." Doing something without looking for a return reveals a truly loving heart. Your poem says this with warmth. It is such a heartwarming feeling to know that you are doing the right thing. Everyone should read this poem and think about the wise words. Excellent. Blessings, Linda
Comment Written 03-May-2008
reply by the author on 03-May-2008
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Thank you, today I needed this. I really enjoyed what you had to say about the poem and thank you for this lovely review and the compliments. Mike
Comment from sueseagull
Very well done! WHen I read the poem the first time, I was not thinking unrequited love. I had the idea of sending poems out to publishers or posting them here on Fanstory.com.Then I read it a second time and out pops your true theme! I see no corrections needed.
Sue
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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Very well done! WHen I read the poem the first time, I was not thinking unrequited love. I had the idea of sending poems out to publishers or posting them here on Fanstory.com.Then I read it a second time and out pops your true theme! I see no corrections needed.
Sue
Comment Written 01-May-2008
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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Thank you very much for the compliments and this review. I think it works with publishers too. lol
Comment from 6422
Enjoyed this poem
Having been in an Unrequited Love relationship for 20 years I am proof that one person loving in a relationship can muddle it through. Not much reward though, but then again the alternative of not being with her is worse.
Regards,
John
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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Enjoyed this poem
Having been in an Unrequited Love relationship for 20 years I am proof that one person loving in a relationship can muddle it through. Not much reward though, but then again the alternative of not being with her is worse.
Regards,
John
Comment Written 01-May-2008
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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this was interesting to read, I feel that there must be something there. My love was not only unrequited, but it was like I was being sucked into the wind tunnel, I am seperated awaiting divorce. I unfortunately came to the conclusion that my love was something that would never be accepted as it was treated like an entitlement. Thank you very much for the compliments and this review.
Comment from iamwrite
Hi, I like this quite a lot, and I think it is a sentiment that resonates with most everyone.
This stanza seemed a bit clunky to me (although I have no suggestions for changing it!):
Whether a simple, "hi," a
little conversation or some of
my poetry.
It comes from the person that I feel
the most comfortable being and I
feel this is way it should be
This stanza is my favorite:
Maybe in the end it wasn't meant for
you anyway, and my words of love to
be thrown on the ground.
To be picked up by someone else, for
them to enjoy and pass around.
(second favorite is the one with SASE in it)
Good job!
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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Hi, I like this quite a lot, and I think it is a sentiment that resonates with most everyone.
This stanza seemed a bit clunky to me (although I have no suggestions for changing it!):
Whether a simple, "hi," a
little conversation or some of
my poetry.
It comes from the person that I feel
the most comfortable being and I
feel this is way it should be
This stanza is my favorite:
Maybe in the end it wasn't meant for
you anyway, and my words of love to
be thrown on the ground.
To be picked up by someone else, for
them to enjoy and pass around.
(second favorite is the one with SASE in it)
Good job!
Comment Written 01-May-2008
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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There are those out there that always send out their love with strings attached. I will love you but I expect... More like a business deal. Thank you very much for your review and compliments.
Comment from Wendyanne
HI Mike. You need to read this through carefully and put in any missing words and I will then review it again. I like the premise of your poem though
Second review. There are still some problems with this Mike. For a start, I wonder if you mean deplored not implored as implored means to be asked, deplored means to be disapproved of. "I think this is THE way it should be." "Few kind smiles that come back TO me." "AN SASE"
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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HI Mike. You need to read this through carefully and put in any missing words and I will then review it again. I like the premise of your poem though
Second review. There are still some problems with this Mike. For a start, I wonder if you mean deplored not implored as implored means to be asked, deplored means to be disapproved of. "I think this is THE way it should be." "Few kind smiles that come back TO me." "AN SASE"
Comment Written 01-May-2008
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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Wendy, my apologies, I have been suffering from extreme sleep deprivation as my step-son was over and I haven't been able to recoup. Your right in your review and I have went back and added a few words, also changed a few lines. Feel free to read again. That why I love this site and will always post hear before anything else. Thank you very much for this review.
Comment from LovnPeace
back me,continues to make the case.......i think a word is missing here
And your thoughts are wonderful Mike. They match mine and probably many other people who read them...I think people are very disconnected anymore. Afraid to feel. Blessings. L&P*
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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back me,continues to make the case.......i think a word is missing here
And your thoughts are wonderful Mike. They match mine and probably many other people who read them...I think people are very disconnected anymore. Afraid to feel. Blessings. L&P*
Comment Written 01-May-2008
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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I believe your are right, I have experienced so much pain that I believe that I am numb to it and what comes forth powerfully is the joy when it can be found. I did have to make some canges and it should read a lot better. Thank you for your compliments and this review.
Comment from S.T.A
Are you going to resent me? According to your bio I would think not! lol...I loved your NOTES...they seemed more "poetic" than this piece!....:0....
Ugg!.... I will be "slaughtered" by this!!!!....
But it was GOOD!!!! Better than, "average!"...
Nite Nite. :)
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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Are you going to resent me? According to your bio I would think not! lol...I loved your NOTES...they seemed more "poetic" than this piece!....:0....
Ugg!.... I will be "slaughtered" by this!!!!....
But it was GOOD!!!! Better than, "average!"...
Nite Nite. :)
Comment Written 01-May-2008
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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My bone white fingures are clutching my claymore, words are usless to respond to this affront. LOL Seriously, I do see your point and have reworked this, so it should read better. You may go back if you wish and re-review it to see if it is more deserved of a better rating. What I think I will do in the future is to cut and past the old version and PM it the reviewer, so it can be printed out and used side by side for comparison. Thank you very much to alert me that things weren't up to snuff. Mike
Comment from Foster
I liked this very much, sensitive yet a feel of independence. I also enjoyed the author?s notes. They were almost as poetic as the piece.
Foster
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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I liked this very much, sensitive yet a feel of independence. I also enjoyed the author?s notes. They were almost as poetic as the piece.
Foster
Comment Written 01-May-2008
reply by the author on 01-May-2008
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Thank you very much for your compliments and this review. Mike
