Comment from Nanette Mary

Excellent

Hullo Snodlander ....

In your writing of this work, whilst you have a pleasant rhythm, you have chosen not to include rhyming which I believe always enhances such a poem.
As this is a Contest entry, I wish you well.
With love from ..... Nanette Mary.

 Comment Written 21-Jul-2007

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reply by the author on 21-Jul-2007

Thanks. Most of my poems do rhyme, but this was a spoof of Beowulf, the original 8th Century English epic, which did not rhyme.

Comment from Kentucky Sweet Pea

Excellent

This is a very well constructed poem and an excellent contest entry. I could find no SPAG and why would I change anything? It's your wonderful poem! Good luck in the contest.

Penny

 Comment Written 21-Jul-2007

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reply by the author on 21-Jul-2007

You're very kind, thank you.

reply by Kentucky Sweet Pea on 21-Jul-2007

you're welcome!

Comment from Alice Farnsworth

Excellent

Snodlander, Hello! I loved your story. Very creative. Now, can I have Robert's business card. I hate doing my books! LOL

I saw nothing to correct. There was some roughness in the rhythm for me but I suspect that is because of differing syllabic emphasis. Okay, accents. You have one, I don't. LOL

Best of luck in the contest, you have a great entry. Alice

 Comment Written 13-Jul-2007

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reply by the author on 13-Jul-2007

Thank you very much. Yep, I'm a bit of rough, but that's where you find diamonds.

Comment from Jiggerella

Excellent

great poem flowed together very nicly and was very good and descriptive and left me with a clear picture of the event really enjoyed your poem good luck with more love to see more writing

 Comment Written 01-Jul-2007

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2007

Thank you for your kind review

Comment from SnowBound

Excellent

Oh I LIKE It!! This is a wonderful poem! Did you write it before I posted the contest or just now? I love the rhythm of it, the making a common man a hero, the dreary drudgery of a day turned bright by a worshiping kiss.

Great contest entry!
Suz

 Comment Written 01-Jul-2007

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reply by the author on 02-Jul-2007

I had already written some of it, and the competition inspired me to make an epic of it.

Comment from Susan E. Pennycuff

Excellent

great story poem here
I generally do not like long story poems
if I am in the mood for a short story I go to short stories
but this was the exception to the rule for me
you did a great job here and I loved it
well done!

Suzi

 Comment Written 01-Jul-2007

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reply by the author on 01-Jul-2007

I'm flattered you made the exception. Thank you