Reviews from

Return To Concorde Valley

Viewing comments for Chapter 30 "The Tunnel's End"
Fantasy based on the intersection of two worlds.

20 total reviews 
Comment from EeanBlack
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Fan fiction is a "you're either in or you're out" genre. I'm going to like this, I think. I love the character break down at the end, it does help a newbie.

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 Comment Written 18-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 18-Apr-2024
    Hi, Eean,
    Glad you reviewed my work. It's not Fan Fiction, but fantasy. Since you gave me 4 stars, do you have any suggestions on how I can improve it?
    Thank you,
    Rhonda
Comment from Daylily
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You have ended in a very intense spot leaving readers eager to find out what is going to happen next. Also, I always like that you have different animals in your chapters that help move the plot along. It is a good strategy.

 Comment Written 04-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 04-Apr-2024
    Hi Lily,
    Thank you for your time and effort on the review. I'm glad you like the animals. I often have animals in my books. Like you said, it moves the plot, and it gives a little emotional support, lol.
    Hugs,
    Rhonda
Comment from Faith Williams
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

An excellent chapter, Rhonda. Your closing line made me chuckle!

Suggestion to consider:
'Echo softly agreed as (the) trudged onward.' I think it should be 'they'.

I imagine if Echo is caught in Hades' web, it will be difficult for her to resist him. He may use her against Theo. Looking forward to the next chapter!


 Comment Written 04-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 04-Apr-2024
    Faith, thank you so much for the six stars and for the wonderful support.
    Echo is about to confront Hades, for sure, but she may have a little more strength then he foresees.

    Take care,
    and thank you ever so much,
    Rhonda
Comment from rspoet
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Rhonda,
Another excellent, interesting chapter in the book.
It appears that Hades is gathering a Zombie army of the dead
to attack Concorde Valley. I've never been sure how one "kills"
a Zombie, since they are already dead? Where do they go, back to Hades?

Phillip and Echo make a good team, though wounding Hades may not
bodes well for Phillip. If Hades dies, where does he go? To Hades?

Hopefully the rabbits will be able to save Hannah in all the confusion.
And it seems Echo will take her place. Theo will not be happy.

Well done.
Best wishes.
Robert






 Comment Written 04-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 04-Apr-2024
    Robert, thank you so much for the lovely 6 stars and 6 star review.
    Hades has lots of baddies on his side, Zombies and otherwise. Interesting question about where the dead dead go... will have to work that in, lol.

    As for Hades, he only has to worry about Thanatos, the true ruler of the dead!!

    Echo for Hannah. Fair trade? Hades may find he's bitten off more than he can chew.

    Thanks for reading and reviewing,
    Rhonda
Comment from BethShelby
Excellent
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Your story is certainly treadings on what sound like extremely dangerous ground. I hate to see Echo in the hand of Hades but I don't want to see Hannah sacrificed, so I sure what you have planned will work.

 Comment Written 04-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
    Hi Beth, yes, they are treading on dangerous ground, and yes, they took off half-cocked, but they are young and youngsters make mistakes. I definitely don't plan for Hannah to get sacrificed. Heads up, he won't want to kill Echo, either. He was doing just what Hermes told Theo, setting a distraction.

    Thanks so much for hanging in there with me.
    Take care,
    Rhonda
Comment from Ulla
Excellent
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Hi Rhonda, I was spellbound throughout this chapter. They are up against a formidable enemy and charismatic one as well. Now, I don't like Echo's idea of trading herself for Hannah. I sure hope it won't come to that. This was very well written, but no sixes left. A hug, Ulla xcx

 Comment Written 04-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 04-Apr-2024
    I'll take the hug over the six stars, Ulla!
    Thank you for reviewing. I'm afraid Echo's die is cast, but there will be mitigating factors.
    Hugs back,
    Rhonda
Comment from nomi338
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Desperate times require desperate actions. When our hands are forced, we can surprise everyone, ourselves included by our actions and the courage that comes to the fore, sometimes in surprising measure. I do believe that there just may be a successful outcome to the current struggles they are encountering.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 04-Apr-2024
    Thank you so much for the review, my friend. Indeed, desperate times breed desperate measures. Also, necessity is the mother of invention. Stay tuned.
    Take care,
    Rhonda
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Excellent
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Echo has come up with a good plan, not a perfect one, but one that will slow down the attack. At seventeen, I can understand why Phillip doesn't like Echo calling him a "child". It's great he can call upon his little army of rabbits.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
    Hi Carol, thank you so much for your review and comments. I think I'm going to edit out the child comment. I had forgotten he was 17, and put 14, then another reviewer pointed out his age from the author's notes. I should have changed that part at the same time. Good call.
    Thank you,
    Rhonda
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
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Oh, Rhonda, I haven't a six left, I realised I'd used them all by lunch time Sunday! I've never done that before!
This was such a fabulous, gripping chapter and I can't wait to find out what happens! You will definitel get the six next time, but you must post on Sunday!! That is not an order, it's sort of a kind of mild ... suggestion? Lol, honestly, Rhonda, this is an exceptional chapter and I loved it. Well done, my friend. I'm really worried about Echo, though. :( Love and hugs, my friend. Sandra xxx

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
    Hi Sandra,
    You're right about the Sunday posting. I waited until Monday because it was Easter, lol. I will be punctual this next Sunday. I ran out of 6's super early, too. It's so easy to do, and so hard to hold onto them.
    I am satisfied with the virtual 6!!

    Hugs,
    Rhonda
reply by Sandra Stoner-Mitchell on 03-Apr-2024
    I will make sure you get your well deserved six next time. 🥰 There aren't many who deserve them, but you are one who does. xxxx
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2024
    Awwww, Sandra, you are too sweet!! I feel the same about your work, and am desperate for you to start another novel! I know you've been through a lot, but I do love your books. I love your poetry, too, and Flossie is a dear.
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It's good that Phillip is good at knife throwing but is he 14 years old as in the text or 17 as in the cast of characters in the notes?
I'm curious about that prophecy and hope Echo gets to do her part.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
    Hi Helen, thank you so much for the review!!
    Thank you for noting the age discrepancy. He should be 17. I'll change it in the story.

    Hugs,
    Rhonda