Right in the Eye
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Right in the Eye, pt 4"The adventures and reaches of people with a divine
11 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
This was a much more enjoyable chapter. I liked using the sense of smell to wake sleeping Slim. And suddenly he has to act like he's a citizen of the next century. There's a lot of trust he has in strangers...
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2024
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This was a much more enjoyable chapter. I liked using the sense of smell to wake sleeping Slim. And suddenly he has to act like he's a citizen of the next century. There's a lot of trust he has in strangers...
Comment Written 28-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2024
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Thank you. Slim has to go with his gut. He has nothing else.
We're still transitioning from Ben/Tony to Ben Paul.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Hi Wayne,
I love what's happening with your 130 year old Slim. He's guide a puzzle for the medical community, that want to send him off for tests to prove his age. With the help of Suzanne, his friend and confederate, he hopes to start living his life.
Great job,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2024
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Hi Wayne,
I love what's happening with your 130 year old Slim. He's guide a puzzle for the medical community, that want to send him off for tests to prove his age. With the help of Suzanne, his friend and confederate, he hopes to start living his life.
Great job,
Rhonda
Comment Written 27-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2024
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Thank you. I'm just glad that the story line works.
Comment from Ric Myworld
You have one of those imaginations that could probably dream up just about any kind of scam that you want to. LOL. And to think, the whole world is trying it with little success. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2024
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You have one of those imaginations that could probably dream up just about any kind of scam that you want to. LOL. And to think, the whole world is trying it with little success. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2024
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I'm laughing, but I don't know why, or whether I 'should' be!
Thank you for your fun review.
And thank you for the six stars!
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
It is interesting learning how the doctor was trying to make him less that one hundred twenty years old, especially as he looked like someone fifty or so. (FYI: My husband has a great aunt who mentally checked out at 30 and when she died in her seventies she looked about 40.) I can understand why he wants to escape any further medical care with Suzanne.
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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It is interesting learning how the doctor was trying to make him less that one hundred twenty years old, especially as he looked like someone fifty or so. (FYI: My husband has a great aunt who mentally checked out at 30 and when she died in her seventies she looked about 40.) I can understand why he wants to escape any further medical care with Suzanne.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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Thank you. You got it completely!
Comment from BethShelby
This is a different kind of story. This guy has listened and had conversations in his head for many years They think he just woke up but he's been concious all that time. I'm enjoying story. Ben Persons must have passed on by now. I wonder what he will do with $2000.
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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This is a different kind of story. This guy has listened and had conversations in his head for many years They think he just woke up but he's been concious all that time. I'm enjoying story. Ben Persons must have passed on by now. I wonder what he will do with $2000.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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Thank you for accepting the change in the Ben/Tony story line.
Yes, Ben died in Alaska within 2-3 years of placing Slim in the institution. Ben Paul and his mother, Beth, helped Tony about 70 years before this point in Slim's tale. Beth will have passed.
Thanks again for your very nice review.
Comment from Wendy G
Well, you are so very imaginative, which I should have known because of your previous stories. I know the sense of smell triggers memories more than any other sense, but this is very creatively intertwining past, present and future.
Well done. I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with this one, and I know there's no point in my trying to guess!!
Wendy
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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Well, you are so very imaginative, which I should have known because of your previous stories. I know the sense of smell triggers memories more than any other sense, but this is very creatively intertwining past, present and future.
Well done. I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with this one, and I know there's no point in my trying to guess!!
Wendy
Comment Written 25-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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Hah! (laughy face here)
Thank you for your very fun review.
Comment from Jim Wile
So Slim has come out of his coma and makes plans to escape. This was an exciting chapter, seeing the confusion of the doctor and the effect of the nurse on him as the smell of her brought him out of his coma.
What will a 120-year-old man do when he escapes? This ought to be interesting.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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So Slim has come out of his coma and makes plans to escape. This was an exciting chapter, seeing the confusion of the doctor and the effect of the nurse on him as the smell of her brought him out of his coma.
What will a 120-year-old man do when he escapes? This ought to be interesting.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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Thank you. I hope I can tie it together.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I though this was an enjoyable tale. Poor Slim! I'd hate to wake in a hospital with memory loss. I think with that you've put together quite the story. I like the investigation. The story has excellent use of dialogue. And I think there is a little dig at intuitional control which I liked. Well done.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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I though this was an enjoyable tale. Poor Slim! I'd hate to wake in a hospital with memory loss. I think with that you've put together quite the story. I like the investigation. The story has excellent use of dialogue. And I think there is a little dig at intuitional control which I liked. Well done.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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Thank you. I appreciate your review very much.
Comment from royowen
Of course we know that Abraham lived till he was 175, and Moses 120 when buried by an angel, he's destined to be one of the two witnesses in the end times, I'm glad he is being rescued, he will escape all sorts of indignities now. Beautifully written Wayne, blessings Roy
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reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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Of course we know that Abraham lived till he was 175, and Moses 120 when buried by an angel, he's destined to be one of the two witnesses in the end times, I'm glad he is being rescued, he will escape all sorts of indignities now. Beautifully written Wayne, blessings Roy
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Comment Written 24-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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Thank you for your very nice review.
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Welcome
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
I'm not so sure about Suzanne here. Is she a good-deeder who is really trying to help Slim, or is she gonna get her mits on that nearly $2,000 and dump him by the side of the road. She seems way to nice and has too good a plan for my taste.
We'll see soon, won't we?
Not sure about the age difference either. What's really going on here?
You've got us in a whirl just like ol' Slim!
Good post, Wayne.
xo
Pam
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reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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I'm not so sure about Suzanne here. Is she a good-deeder who is really trying to help Slim, or is she gonna get her mits on that nearly $2,000 and dump him by the side of the road. She seems way to nice and has too good a plan for my taste.
We'll see soon, won't we?
Not sure about the age difference either. What's really going on here?
You've got us in a whirl just like ol' Slim!
Good post, Wayne.
xo
Pam
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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smiley face here
Thank you.
I could have added a bit more of Suzanne, but you have exactly described why this way might be better.
So you bought the scent/aroma waking him? I've read that the sense of smell is far more intellectually stimulating than given proper credit.
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Yes, especially since it reminded him of the one special person in his life. For a moment, I thought he was confused about the time he was in and it was LuAnn but she had changed her name to begin a new life.
