Pieces of Butternut and Blue
An unlikely pairing22 total reviews
Comment from T B Botts
Hello John,
I see this was written over a month ago. I was checking out some of the contests, and ran across this story. It's well written. I didn't realize that the slang for blacks was butternut. It confuses me a bit that a black man would be fighting for the confederates, but I guess I'll get the answer to that in the next installment. Good luck in the contest.
Blessings,
Tom
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2023
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Hello John,
I see this was written over a month ago. I was checking out some of the contests, and ran across this story. It's well written. I didn't realize that the slang for blacks was butternut. It confuses me a bit that a black man would be fighting for the confederates, but I guess I'll get the answer to that in the next installment. Good luck in the contest.
Blessings,
Tom
Comment Written 05-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2023
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Hi Tom, thank you for this wonderful review and for returning to read.
In response to your confusion, "Butternut" was what the Union soldiers nicknamed the Confederate soldiers due to the light butternut color of their uniforms, and believe it or not, the Confederate side did have black soldiers. It was cool to learn that and is what prompted the story. Thanks again, Tom!
Comment from Liz O'Neill
This is very true to form. Your use of the regional dialect, clearly separates the characters and their loyalties. I think I was in the civil war in a past lifetime, so this interests me. This is great line: "What has no meaning to one man has plenty for another." I like you bits of wisdom: You can't cipher another man's life by lookin' into his eyes."
I am definitely coming back. I have to give you A+
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2023
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This is very true to form. Your use of the regional dialect, clearly separates the characters and their loyalties. I think I was in the civil war in a past lifetime, so this interests me. This is great line: "What has no meaning to one man has plenty for another." I like you bits of wisdom: You can't cipher another man's life by lookin' into his eyes."
I am definitely coming back. I have to give you A+
Comment Written 06-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2023
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Liz! Thank you so much for the six stars and the A+ I'm honored and so happy that you enjoyed it.
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I certainly did & have it down to continue
Comment from Terry Broxson
John, this is an outstanding historical fiction story. I like everything about it. The characters are engaging to your reader, and the setting and conflict seem genuine and interesting. The only problem I can see is keeping the story going at the high level you have created. But it is good hands. I am looking forward to the next installment. Terry.
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2023
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John, this is an outstanding historical fiction story. I like everything about it. The characters are engaging to your reader, and the setting and conflict seem genuine and interesting. The only problem I can see is keeping the story going at the high level you have created. But it is good hands. I am looking forward to the next installment. Terry.
Comment Written 05-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2023
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Terry, thank you so much for the six and the inspiring words. Yes, I always do that to myself with the intensity, and then I have to match it. It's a challenge, but it gives me that little push to make the next chapter better. Thank you again, Terry!
Comment from irishauthorme
This story, penetrating and surprisingly accurate for our times, deserved a 6.
Laser-sharp dialogue, and delivered in a life-or-death situation, was brought to reality, I can imagine that such an exchange actually occurred.
Your insight into a racial equality crisis that exists in our country is phenomenal.
This fiction has a direct bearing on the direction our country, the greatest country the world has ever seen, is obvious. Great work!
irish
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2023
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This story, penetrating and surprisingly accurate for our times, deserved a 6.
Laser-sharp dialogue, and delivered in a life-or-death situation, was brought to reality, I can imagine that such an exchange actually occurred.
Your insight into a racial equality crisis that exists in our country is phenomenal.
This fiction has a direct bearing on the direction our country, the greatest country the world has ever seen, is obvious. Great work!
irish
Comment Written 04-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2023
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Thank you, irish, for the great review, words of wisdom, and of course, for the six stars. I always look for your reviews and comments
Comment from Gloria ....
I think you did a fine job of your fictional account from the Civil War. The dialogue developed the setting as the sights were subtly taken in.
It is an interesting interaction between Ben and Hoop that does raise curiosity about where it will end.
The only part that I thought could use some pruning is the overuse of proper names. For example in the third paragraph Hoop is used three times in two sentences.
Also I think it's a typo in the subtitle? Not sure yet, because it might be paring with that blade, rather than pairing.
That said, this is exceptional writing that I much enjoyed. :)
Gloria
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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I think you did a fine job of your fictional account from the Civil War. The dialogue developed the setting as the sights were subtly taken in.
It is an interesting interaction between Ben and Hoop that does raise curiosity about where it will end.
The only part that I thought could use some pruning is the overuse of proper names. For example in the third paragraph Hoop is used three times in two sentences.
Also I think it's a typo in the subtitle? Not sure yet, because it might be paring with that blade, rather than pairing.
That said, this is exceptional writing that I much enjoyed. :)
Gloria
Comment Written 04-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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Gloria, Thank you so much for the critiques. I did make some changes in that third paragraph without confusing the reader as to who and what was doing what. Thank you for paring / pairing. I made that change as well. I also want to thank you for the six stars and inspirational words. They mean a lot!
Comment from Annmuma
I am eagerly waiting for the next chapter in this story! It is well written and allows the reader to feel a part of the scene. My first inclination was to just hit the high spots and move on -- then I found the entire story to be 'high spots'. Great writing. ann
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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I am eagerly waiting for the next chapter in this story! It is well written and allows the reader to feel a part of the scene. My first inclination was to just hit the high spots and move on -- then I found the entire story to be 'high spots'. Great writing. ann
Comment Written 04-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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Thank you, Ann, for the great review and the six stars. I'm happy you read through it.
Comment from BethShelby
I find it interesting that you say you're keeping it as accurate as possible that that it should be seen as a fictional story. I will say that you making me interested enough in this pair to be wanting more. It is good writing.
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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I find it interesting that you say you're keeping it as accurate as possible that that it should be seen as a fictional story. I will say that you making me interested enough in this pair to be wanting more. It is good writing.
Comment Written 04-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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Thank you, Beth for a great review!
Comment from Ric Myworld
I always enjoy whatever you write, but I have to say that this might be my favorite of your stories yet. I just wish I had a six to reward it properly. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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I always enjoy whatever you write, but I have to say that this might be my favorite of your stories yet. I just wish I had a six to reward it properly. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 04-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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Thank you, Ric, for the virtual six and the words of inspiration!
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It's always a pleasure!
Comment from Navada
This definitely left me wanting more. I'm curious about the respective backgrounds of both men and what their future connection will be. I'm also curious about Hoop's level of education and how he wasn't punished for educating himself. I will keep an out for the next installment.
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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This definitely left me wanting more. I'm curious about the respective backgrounds of both men and what their future connection will be. I'm also curious about Hoop's level of education and how he wasn't punished for educating himself. I will keep an out for the next installment.
Comment Written 04-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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Thank you so much for the great review, Navada!
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
"That's what war is all about, Yankee?" Remove the question mark.
"I have to say, you gotta a lot of spunk . . ." Remove "a"
"Looks like the fightin' moved further on down."
Should be farther as you're talking about distance
John, this seems like a different writing direction for you, and I like it a lot. I assume you've been reading Civil War books and this came to you through that? At first, I thought this was historical fiction, but you say it's fictional.
To stop time in the middle of such a war to give us the human side of death and lives interrupted is such an original and interesting idea. I'm looking forward to reading more. I imagine we'll get both sides of this story.
War . . . we do it a lot, don't we?
Very well told, John.
xo
Pam
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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"That's what war is all about, Yankee?" Remove the question mark.
"I have to say, you gotta a lot of spunk . . ." Remove "a"
"Looks like the fightin' moved further on down."
Should be farther as you're talking about distance
John, this seems like a different writing direction for you, and I like it a lot. I assume you've been reading Civil War books and this came to you through that? At first, I thought this was historical fiction, but you say it's fictional.
To stop time in the middle of such a war to give us the human side of death and lives interrupted is such an original and interesting idea. I'm looking forward to reading more. I imagine we'll get both sides of this story.
War . . . we do it a lot, don't we?
Very well told, John.
xo
Pam
Comment Written 04-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2023
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Hi, Pam! Thank you for the great review. The diction was purposely used to emulate the character's accent. I know further/ farther is a stretch, but farther didn't sound right for him. "a" was also purposely used. You always spend time with my work and I love you for that, my friend. Hugs
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Thanks for clarifying; makes sense. I really enjoyed this one; wish I had a six, but let me know when you're posting again and I'll save one.
