The Minute Poem
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "The Approaching Storm"minute poems
114 total reviews
Comment from MJMuraco
Thank you for the author notes again as they always educate me in my efforts to be a better writer. The presentation is great and I especially liked "Will gods who rule the surging sea
spare those who plea?
They long to know
as billows grow.
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
  |
Thank you for the author notes again as they always educate me in my efforts to be a better writer. The presentation is great and I especially liked "Will gods who rule the surging sea
spare those who plea?
They long to know
as billows grow.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
-
Thanks so much, Mary Jayne :-) Brooke
Comment from amel
I could feel wave that so powerful
echoing Poseidon's roar
rage toward the shore,
his dark command,
to storm the land.
All the stanzas are thrilling. I could feel in my heart the giant tremendous power of nature. Very well done, Brooke. Love, amel
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
|
I could feel wave that so powerful
echoing Poseidon's roar
rage toward the shore,
his dark command,
to storm the land.
All the stanzas are thrilling. I could feel in my heart the giant tremendous power of nature. Very well done, Brooke. Love, amel
Comment Written 03-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
-
thank you, Amel - I appreciate your kind review :-) Brooke
Comment from MizKat
Brooke - Your poetry for the minute poem prompt is beautiful. I'm glad you wrote author's notes about what some of the things are. I was wondering how a horse got in there and the only Poseidon I know about is the ship that sank. (It would have roared, too.) LOL Sorry for showing my ignorace. Kat
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
 |
Brooke - Your poetry for the minute poem prompt is beautiful. I'm glad you wrote author's notes about what some of the things are. I was wondering how a horse got in there and the only Poseidon I know about is the ship that sank. (It would have roared, too.) LOL Sorry for showing my ignorace. Kat
Comment Written 03-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
-
Thank you so much, Kat. Hey, there are lots of things I don't know about, which is why I often share information in my author's notes. I know there are many times I appreciate learning something new from a writer on topics where I'm less aware! Who says we all reached graduation and then knew everything there was to know about everything! LOL You are most generous, and I'm most appreciative :-) Brooke
Comment from Kashif Ali Abbas
Wow. brooke, I loved it and I really enjoyed it. What a beautiful minute poem.
The way you make the mind of the reader flow is awesome and great. The poetic excellence is depicted here. Great job done!
However, just one issue, as this is in 8/4/4/4 with rhyme and in iambic, I found line 2 of first stanza having more than 4 syllables.
rage toward the shore [ This line has 5 syllables.The word {toward} has 2 syllables making five for the line]
Best wishes
K
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
|
Wow. brooke, I loved it and I really enjoyed it. What a beautiful minute poem.
The way you make the mind of the reader flow is awesome and great. The poetic excellence is depicted here. Great job done!
However, just one issue, as this is in 8/4/4/4 with rhyme and in iambic, I found line 2 of first stanza having more than 4 syllables.
rage toward the shore [ This line has 5 syllables.The word {toward} has 2 syllables making five for the line]
Best wishes
K
Comment Written 03-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
-
Kashif, in my area people say tawrd, rhyming with chord and sword - the one syllable variety of tawrd is also the first listing in my Oxford Dictionary. Thanks so much for your thoughtful review. Brooke :-)
Comment from jamierose
This is a great poem, gives a very dramatic picture in my mind. The actual picture is very complimentary to the words. I don't know enough about poetry to comment on the technical stuff, I just review on how I enjoyed reading and I enjoyed this
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
|
This is a great poem, gives a very dramatic picture in my mind. The actual picture is very complimentary to the words. I don't know enough about poetry to comment on the technical stuff, I just review on how I enjoyed reading and I enjoyed this
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
-
Thanks so much, jamierose. I'm so glad you enjoyed reading this. Brooke :-)
Comment from samandlancelot
No mercy do white horses show
while wild winds blow
to toss their manes
as chaos reigns. (I like the white caps representing the mane of a horse).
Well done!
Patricia
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
|
No mercy do white horses show
while wild winds blow
to toss their manes
as chaos reigns. (I like the white caps representing the mane of a horse).
Well done!
Patricia
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
-
Thanks so much, Patricia. Glad you enjoyed this poem :-) Brooke
Comment from toni guerrero
I liked your poem because it had alot of
intensity. There was strong movement in the words.I could feel the action.I would reccomend it to others to read.
Good Luck and keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
|
I liked your poem because it had alot of
intensity. There was strong movement in the words.I could feel the action.I would reccomend it to others to read.
Good Luck and keep up the good work.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
-
Thank you, Toni. I truly appreciate your thoughtful response to my poem :-) Brooke
Comment from MissMerri
In the wake of the Chilean earthquakes and tsunami, this is such a timely poem, as well as being exceptionally well written. So often I learn something from your author notes that I hadn't known before. Today I learned that Poseidon was the god of earthquakes, as well as of the ocean. I did not know about the earthquake part. That was fascinating. The minute poem is an appealing form. Your rhymes are great but you've added allitertion and assonance which also add to the beauty of your verses.
This verse I especially loved:
No mercy do white horses show
while wild winds blow
to toss their manes
as chaos reigns.
All I can say is "WOW!"
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
|
In the wake of the Chilean earthquakes and tsunami, this is such a timely poem, as well as being exceptionally well written. So often I learn something from your author notes that I hadn't known before. Today I learned that Poseidon was the god of earthquakes, as well as of the ocean. I did not know about the earthquake part. That was fascinating. The minute poem is an appealing form. Your rhymes are great but you've added allitertion and assonance which also add to the beauty of your verses.
This verse I especially loved:
No mercy do white horses show
while wild winds blow
to toss their manes
as chaos reigns.
All I can say is "WOW!"
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
-
thank you so much, MissMerri - your comments are truly thoughtful and gracious and your rating very generous - I appreciate everything you've said. Brooke :-)
Comment from bohemiangeek
Your words captured what it would be like to witness such a storm. I was raised in Miami, and we do have wicked tropical storms more than hurricanes. The Atlantic ocean can be unforgiving and your poem reminded me of such. Your poem's expression was precise.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
|
Your words captured what it would be like to witness such a storm. I was raised in Miami, and we do have wicked tropical storms more than hurricanes. The Atlantic ocean can be unforgiving and your poem reminded me of such. Your poem's expression was precise.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
-
Thank you, bohemiangeek - I'm glad you could relate to this :-) Brooke
Comment from HAWordsmith
Very nice, a pleasure to read and see this through your eyes. I loved the image you create of the wild horses rushing forward, tossing their manes. Just lovely. The only line that threw me a little was S3L1...you specifically referred to Poseidon in the first stanza, but then say "gods" in this stanza. Nothing major though and it does not detract from the verse. Thank you for posting this one. Many blessings. Oh, almost forgot...nice use of alliteration as well.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
|
Very nice, a pleasure to read and see this through your eyes. I loved the image you create of the wild horses rushing forward, tossing their manes. Just lovely. The only line that threw me a little was S3L1...you specifically referred to Poseidon in the first stanza, but then say "gods" in this stanza. Nothing major though and it does not detract from the verse. Thank you for posting this one. Many blessings. Oh, almost forgot...nice use of alliteration as well.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2010
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2010
-
I will reread that line, my friend - thanks for your thoughtful review :-) Brooke
